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UCFMiss · Jul 8, 2007, 04:33 PM

Ok... first let me introduce myself. I am a 21 year old senior college student studying criminal justice, criminal profiling and crime scene investigation.

My story: 2 years ago, during a class, I met the most amazing person I've ever imagined. We hit it off on the first day and remained close ever since. I knew from the second I spoke to him, he was the person I wanted to be with. Unfortunately, at the time, we both were in other relationships. After several months of being friends our connection became more and more apparent. I finally got the guts to tell him how I felt, and to my surprise, he'd had feeling for me all along as well... We immediately started dating and eventually became a "couple." Almost 10 months later, we're more in love than ever.

I can honestly say, I am more than 100% certain he is the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. We've talked about it a lot and we both feel the same way. I've also expressed how I DON'T want to live with him or anything like that until we're at least engaged... My first question is, is that unreasonable? I mean, it's something I want to save. I want him to be the FIRST and LAST guy I ever move in with.

Secondly, if we were to get engaged in the next year, I'd be almost 22, he'd be 23... putting a marriage age around 23-24. Is this too young?

We both are interested in the same career path, and want to pursue further education after college this winter... are we doing the right thing? I really want to marry this man, I just want to make sure I'm not being crazy, wanting to get married at 23-24.

nauticalstar420 · Jul 8, 2007, 04:39 PM

23 or 24 isn't too young to get married if you love each other. I got married at 20! :) It isn't unreasonable to move in until you are at least engaged. Most people that haven't decided to marry, and move in together anyway, sometimes get on eachother's nerves and either fight non stop or break up. It is great that you want to further your education, that is the best thing anyone can do! Also, that job that comes from that education will make you more financially prepared for a house, cars, children, etc.

beingteri · Jul 19, 2007, 07:55 PM

Wow, 21. You may be young, but it sounds like you have a pretty good head on your shoulders. It sounds like you are a pretty driven person that knows what she wants and goes after it with confidence... until now. I believe, that when you know... you know. If you are asking if this is too much too fast at such a young age, it may be that you want someone to validate your insecurity or talk you out of it. As far as being the engaged before moving in... WHY? You posted, "first and last person to move in with", so I'll assume you didn't save anything else. That's okay! One usually saves these things as a hold out position. If he feels the same way you do & the way you describe it, then that won't matter... he's on the same page as you. What difference will a pretty ring make? The commitment is either there or it's not. No paper marriage certificate, or ring, or big expensive party will make your commitment to each other any stronger, nor will it provide you security, or guaranty marital success. IF you are having doubts of ANY kind, it may be your subconsious intuition trying to tell you something... I'd say, follow it. I've found my best relationships are the ones I have no expectations. No expectation-No disappointment. But have Fun!

talaniman · Jul 19, 2007, 10:18 PM

I just want to make sure I'm not being crazy, wanting to get married at 23-24.

It is very reasonable, but 10 months is not a long time to know some one and your still getting to know each other, but by not moving in right now, and you both keeping with the goals you have set in life, I can see that you are going about this in a healthy and mature way, and I do hope it works as planned.