[Awesomeness616]

Ok so anyway I may be 12 but I'm in middle school and even in 6th grade the kids there had girlfriends/boyfriends. Don't say I'm too young cause like I said a lot of kids my age have gf/bf these days. Anyway so in 6th grade I had a friend that was a girl. We didn't really talk but we had a relationship where we usually argue against each other even though we don't really mean it and we both know we don't mean it. We go to different middle schools but we still see each other and we text each other almost every day. Anyway usually when a girl and a boy argue with each other or say they hate each other it means that they like each other. A kid even started a rumor that I liked her. Before I wasn't sure if I liked her and I wasn't so sure of my feelings but now it's clear to me. Also one more thing. Since I used to have the fake hate relationship before she thought it was annoying to me when we are together somewhere to say hey and then my name in a flirty kind of way even though I liked it and also for some reason the teacher used to pair us up together several times and during kickball practice she wasn't there so I was relived but was kind of sad. I was the last one in line to kick when she arrived after a doctors appointment and since the teacher said the pattern in the line had to be boy girl boy girl she was right next to me and I couldn't switch spots cause I was at the back.
Last thing. She may be in love with me but I'm not sure. Here are signs that I think show she is in love with me

1. During the kickball game 6th graders vs teachers I was the last to kick and she kept cheering me on and was one of only ones cheering cause the other times I was kicking I didn't do good. When I kicked I kicked really far and I ran the bases and scored a point.

2. The last day on school I was a little shy to ask her to sign my yearbook cause I didn't ask many of the girls in class to sign my yearbook and if she was one of the few she may think she was special and that I was in love with her. Reason I didn't want that is because she was surrounded by all her friends. So finally when she left her friends to go inside for dodgeball I asked her. Later during the dodgeball game I was looking in the yearbook while on sidelines and noticed that she had put a big red heart under her name.

3. When we wer leaving she went through a catwalk to a neighborhood and I went the opposite way toward the buses and we looked back at each other and she smiled and winked at me

4. When she sat at the seat across from me everyday during math I wouldn't talk to anybody while at my seat cause I was surrounded by somebody in my class I didn't talk to, my old crush, my best friends annoying friend, and somebody else that I forgot. So to make me smile she used to play with my feet under the table to try and tickle me. I couldn't resist smiling and quietly laughing

So I'm just wondering if you could answer these questions

1. What should I do now? Continue to talk to her over text and be her friend. Make my move and ask her to be my girlfriend. Or just keep texting her and every once in a while post more questions

2. Using the things I told u, does she like me? I'm not sure if that's just things a friend does or what cause I have only had one girlfriend in 2nd grade and that was not official but we dessik ( the last word is backwards ) but she was a grade above me and the reason we knew each other because she was my best friends sister. I also had a crush last year but me and friend Adam both liked her but Adam let me have her and then told her that I liked her. So does she like me?

That's it and please answer the questions soon please
Thanks you to whoever is going to answer and help me.
Also if you are helpful then tell me if there's some kind of subscribe or like and I will like/subscribe or whatever your page.
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[Fr_Chuck]

Just talk to her and be friends, please understand, when adults tell you "you are too young" we are talking about, adult or even high school level dating, and more. Most girlfriend/boyfriend in 6 grade is just saying you are, and maybe saying it on Facebook, and perhaps being together a little,

Real dating, has a long way to go.

It is best at this time, just be friends and let things happen natural, if they are to happen.

[Homegirl 50]

Just continue to talk to her, be friends. At your ages, she may like you may have a crush. You are both too young for anything else.

[Awesomeness616]

Ok people my age are together and the girls gossip all day so when I my desk was surrounded by girls I had nothing else to do but listen and do work. But I couldn't concentrate so I listened. My best friend Damian had a girlfriend. So anyway they weren't just calling themselves a couple. They held hands, always talked together and hung out after school, even at the movies. Yes they put it on Facebook. I don't mean like high school dating like kissing and going out to dinner and stuff. Just hanging out sometimes,always texting each other, it being official and sometimes being a little romantic. Besides we are in 7th grade and we are in middle school. Almost everybody has a girlfriend. 3/4 of the school is dating somebody. Just answer questions like I'm older and I'm not just some little kid

[Homegirl 50]

You are a 12 year old kid and you both likely have a crush on each other. You talk to each other, text or whatever kids your age do. Relax and enjoy these years.

[talaniman]

Being awkward and not knowing what to do is but the beginning of your learning experience. So learn by talking to her and you both decide how you will handle whatever it is you are playing around with. You want a title, and to be an official couple like everyone else is, then have the guts to say so, but make sure that's what YOU want.

No telling what she wants, but only ONE way to find out, and that's by asking. So talk to her. At your age, probably doesn't matter if it's in person, or through texts, or phone.

[joypulv]

I was 12 in 1958. Nothing new except for the electronics. My parents were 12 in 1930. Nothing new there either. Boy-girl angst takes a million forms, and you are doing fine.

You think this is confusing? Your next 10 years will be even more confusing, and then the next 10 in different ways, and maybe when you are about 40 or 50 you might start to understand about other people.

I have friends who love to argue, and friends who can't stand it. I like it, as long as it's intelligent and not personal and mean.

[ScottGem]

Have you talked to your parents about this? Having a romantic relationship, a dating relationship has to be under your parents approval. If they don't think you are ready then wait.

[Oliver2011]

I have to say that you have done a nice job organizing your thoughts into words. Very impressive. A lot of the adults on here could learn from your writing skills.

[Awesomeness616]

Thank u Oliver and talaniman u wer the only helpful answer on this post. Also my friends and other people that I know don't tell their parents. They just keep it a secret for a while and then when they are older and when parents are OK with them to start dating then you can let them know. Besides my mom is fine with it. She asks me all the time if I have a girlfriend. I say no cause I don't have one yet and that's why I posted this question. My dad doesn't ask about my love life or anything and has never mentioned it. So just answer the questions please
😃
Also is there some kind of subscribe or like to accounts cause I want to do that to some helpful people

[ScottGem]

Thank u Oliver and talaniman u wer the only helpful answer on this post. Also my friends and other people that I know don't tell their parents. They just keep it a secret for a while and then when they are older and when parents are OK with them to start dating then you can let them know. Besides my mom is fine with it. She asks me all the time if I have a girlfriend. I say no cause I don't have one yet and that's why I posted this question. My dad doesn't ask about my love life or anything and has never mentioned it. So just answer the questions please
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Also is there some kind of subscribe or like to accounts cause I want to do that to some helpful people

Wrong, all your answers were helpful. Just because you didn't like them, doesn't mean they weren't valid, helpful responses.

You don't dictate how people can respond to your posts. As long as the responses don't violate our rules, they are valid. You are free to ignore them, but don't tell people how to answer.

There is a star in the lower left corner of a post that you can use to add to a person's reputation.

But the thing that really bothers me is that you (or at least your friends) are keeping secrets from your parents. Parents do find out and this damages the relationships. And just because your mom asks you doesn't mean she is OK with it. More likely she is concerned and wants to know about your friendships so she can help you through a confusing time. Your dad is probably leaving her to do this. Your whole attitude expressed in this response, while typical of a 12 yr old, is worrisome about your future relationship with your parents and with the opposite sex.

[Awesomeness616]

All the answers wer helpful but I'm just sayer talaminan had the most helpful. Sometimes I say things in the wrong way. So the secret thing is that they aren't really secrets. Besides when my mom asks me that sometimes she can completely tell whether I like somebody or not just by the way I say it. A lot of people have a sign that shows when people are lying or telling the truth. Besides if it wer a secret then parents would get mad for keeping it to ourselves. From what I've seen from how parents reacte to finding out their son/daughter is in a relationship is that they are surprised by proud that they found a boyfriend/girlfriend. My moms friends came over once and saw that her son posted something on Facebook that he was dating someone and she got excited and was happy. She asked me if it was true and when I said it was she was happy. Besides when kids tell there parents they say that they just started dating. Parents would be mad if they find that the kids has been dating for a long time or caught them talking about their relationship. Ok it may bother u but some kids do tell their parents strait away. Besides I can't tell my mom that I have a girlfriend cause I don't have one yet that's why I'm asking this question.

[DoulaLC]

What a girlfriend is to a 12 year old will be quite different from what a girlfriend will be to a 16 year old. Many kids have "girlfriends" or "boyfriends". It is simply a label that you give to someone you like, who you talk to, who you might meet up with at the movies when your parent drops you off, etc.

Continue to talk to her. If you feel she is interested, you can ask her if she will be your girlfriend, so that you can say you have a girlfriend. I know it makes kids feel more grown up and part of the crowd. Just don't ever feel that you have to do something just because "everyone else" does. No one will look at you differently if you didn't have a girlfriend at this age... at least they shouldn't. And that isn't just for the girlfriend issue... that goes for anything your friends or other kids at school do.

[Awesomeness616]

Thank u DoulaLC. That is helpful. I just want to say one more thing. I like this girl a lot and I think that we may have a future together. Prabodly not since it takes a lot of dating until u find the right person. I can sometimes imagine a future with her. So I think this question is answered except for this quick question
1. I am a little shy so if I do ask her if she wants to be my girlfriend soon I would need advice of what to say so can u tell me advice so I don't say the wrong thing? Also how long do u think I should wait until I should ask her?

[Alty]

I didn't read all the answers.

I will say this.

I have a 12 year old daughter, and a 16 year old son. Neither of them has ever had a boyfriend or a girlfriend. Why are you in such a hurry?

My son is allowed to date. He likes a few girls at his school, but he's in no hurry. No reason to be, according to him. It's not like having a girlfriend means anything at his age. He doesn't want to be tied to one person either. Girls and guys today make dating too big a deal, in his opinion. When I told him you're 12 he said "Dude, why? Seriously dude, you're a kid. Where can you take your girlfriend, to the playground?"

My daughter, the 12 year old, your age, is not allowed to date. Even if she were, she doesn't want to. In her words, and she's reading this as I write it, it's stupid. Holding hands with someone just so you can say you have a boyfriend? It's all about fitting in. It has nothing to do with actually wanting to date. She doesn't want to "date" anyone when it's not really dating, and at 12, she's too young to date. She told me "A lot of the kids in my class are "dating" someone. It's so funny. They hold hands sometimes, but most of the time they don't even see each other, they text, and that's it. My best friend dated a guy for 2 weeks. She didn't even really like him, she just wanted to say she dated someone. Me, I don't care. I don't want to date anyone now."

I asked my 12 year old daughter to answer your questions. So here are her answers. She's your age, so she knows the best way to answer, especially since she's a girl too.

1. If you like her just tell her. If she likes you she'll tell you. Say the wrong thing? Isn't she your friend now? If she is, she's your friend. You can't say the wrong thing to a friend. Do you even talk to this girl?

2. Wait? If you like her, ask her. Ask her now. But you want a time. Um... wait 2 weeks. I don't know why, but you wanted to know how long you should wait, so I say you should wait 2 weeks. But I don't know why it would matter how long you wait. Waiting won't make her like you more.

[Cat1864]

If your parents allow you to 'date' that is fine, but we cannot give you advice that goes against your parents' rules. Sneaking and lying are definitely not allowed by most parents so be honest with your parents. They may be happy. They may give you a few lectures. But that is part of the parent/child relationship.

Time for a reality check. In a different thread you mention your mother and you may (probably will) be moving after Christmas to a city three hours away from your current location.

Pets and girlfriends need to wait until you are settled into your new living arrangements or your mother changes her mind. Become friends, but do not encourage anything more at this time.

[Awesomeness616]

Ok nvm the moving thing. He found a job 20 minutes away from where we live. Also for the pet thing I will be getting one but my mom had to work that day and I have school so I went there with my dad and he said that he doesn't have money for the bird bit he's trying to find it cheaper on craiglist. That part is for cat1864

And for alty I'm just providing more info
I have known her for 5 years since 3rd grade and the fake argue relationship started in 6th grade which is the beginning of the 4th year and now we aren't doing the fake argue thing anymore. We are friends now and we talk to each other on kik messenger and she's getting a skype so we will start to have video chats and we sometimes see each other at the movies and her friend from school owns the house behind mine so when she comes over to her friends me and my friend Adam meet them outside. Also for the how long you have to wait question you would have to be friends and have known each other for a while. If u just meet a girl and you ask her then that would be a bad idea. I don't mean waiting would make her like me more cause you would have to get to know each other.
Also one other thing. Before when we wer in 6th grade I didn't hang out with her much in the beginning of the year because I was shy to talk to her face to face when it's just us. I'm still a little shy and I want to how I could be more confident when talking to her

[Alty]

Boy are you showing how young you are, and why kids shouldn't date.

But I'll play along.

Okay, you've known her for 5 years, and you fake argue and fake fight, and fake everything else with each other. So why not ask her to fake be your girlfriend? At 12, dating is fake. It's not real. It can't be! That's what you don't get.

Sad that you mentioned messaging each other, and skying, and sometimes seeing each other in person. Very sad.

You said in another post that you're pretty sure she's in love with you. So what's the problem?

Here are the facts. If mommy and daddy say you're too young to date, and won't allow it, then you can't date. So ask mommy and daddy now. Don't ask after you ask this girl to occasionally hold hands at school and text and skype each other. Ask now, so you know if you're allowed to date. Because at 12, what mommy and daddy say, that's the law. If they say no, you can't date. Guess what, same goes for her. If her mommy and daddy say no, that she can't date, then she can't. That's the law!

So tackle that part first, then worry about asking out the girl that you're very sure already loves you, that you can see a future with, when you're both kids!

Sigh. Makes me want to just smack my head against a wall. One day you'll be grown up and you'll look back and realize how very silly this all is. Until then, nothing any adult that knows better, says, will matter. So really, do what you want, because that's what you'll do anyway. No real need to ask for advice because you're not going to follow it anyway.

[Homegirl 50]

You're 12. Just get to know her. At 12 you would be shy so be friends. You shouldn't be more than that at your age anyway.

[talaniman]

My young friend, until you have found your courage to express yourself, you are going to drive yourself crazy, worrying about everything you are just afraid to do. And that's only half the battle. What if she doesn't want a title, or spend time with JUST you? Or her crush has faded for you and gone for someone else.

Not trying to add to your fear, but at some point you have to take some action, at least try, and get yourself over this hump. You are thoughtful, smart and articulate, very well written for a fellow your age, so put it together and take a chance, succeed or fail, but you have to try, and that's the life lesson here to be learned, if you don't at least try, you will NEVER succeed.

The real question is how long will she wait for you to find some courage to express yourself? Worse another fellow with confidence takes her attention from you. Then you will kick yourself for not acting. A whole new set of problems besides you being afraid. You said you are ready for this, then do something about it.