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Nestorian · Apr 20, 2009, 04:14 PM

Originally Posted by theresbeautyinu

i play the violin... i love it... but he says i can do better and everything. =\

Do you find this happens during the winter/fall seasons? You sound like something is going on in your head. (No offence, I 'm bipolar and I often felt as you do, only when I was depressed. I was more depressive than manic.) Do you ever get really really big boosts of energy, become talkative, excited, agitated easily, overly aggressive, fell extreamly anxious like you should be some where else?

I'm going to suggest you talk to a Doctor, or counseler. I know you may not like them, niether did I, but I know better now. They are tools that you use to get info for what "maybe" going on. They may help you out and make you feel a lot better. But you do have to give it time, and go through trial and errors. Better to fight for a chance at being at peace than always suffering eh? I did that for 10years before I finnaly worked hard enough on it to get better. You may not even need meds.
But that's just a suggestion.

Violin is hard to play, I like that kind of stuff, but I am trying to learn guitar. I call it my Guitfiddle. Haha.

theresbeautyinu · Apr 20, 2009, 04:18 PM

=) I do experience some of those things... I'm so afraid to talk to other people about it... I feel like... no one will ever understand me completely no matter who I talk to... and I don't want medication or feel like I'm crazy... I just... I'm scared.

theresbeautyinu · Apr 20, 2009, 04:38 PM

And it is worse in the fall/winter seasons... but it stared in the mid late summer of 08.

Nestorian · Apr 20, 2009, 04:38 PM

Originally Posted by theresbeautyinu

=) i do experience some of those things... im so afraid to talk to other people about it... i feel like.... no one will ever understand me completely no matter who i talk to... and i dont want medication or feel like im crazy... i just... im scared.

You may be Bipolar too. You are not crazy, your brain actually funtions at an excelerated rate, some times, then it crashes some times. That's how I describe it when people ask me, if it means I'm crazy or hearing things, which if you don't be careful you can halucinate.

If you are Bipolar, your brain chemistry is a little off, whether it's genetic, they figure people with certain traits are more likely to be bipolar but they do not cause it; Or, due to diet, or chamical induced nuero cahnges, it is manageble.

Yes you may have to take medication, but if you work hard at it, you won't be catatonic nor lethargic nor comatos, but rather you will feel "level". I'd use the word normal but its' too hard to define what is normal. Your emotions will settle and stablize on a more even plain. That inture means your brain is not sending chemicals through your neurons, which give us the feelings of Euphoria, love, anger, fear, anxiety, and much more, and leaves us struggling in a sea of madness. One minute we feel very low and like we have simply drowned, or raise us up to the very highest peek of a wave, even rather calm and unconcerned for things going one way or the other way. Apathetic.

Don't be scared of it, it's actually quite harmless once you get some help, yes I mean counselers/Psychiatrists, "that you believe/trust".

If you want I'll give you a bunch of info as I've got quite a lot on it since, I am bipolar then you can at least talk to some one you are comfortable with..?

Nestorian · Apr 20, 2009, 04:41 PM

Originally Posted by theresbeautyinu

and it is worse in the fall/winter seasons... but it stared in the mid late summer of 08.

You do feel the mania too right? You get really aggitated, anxious, happy talkative, excited, etc.

And the depressive we know for sure. I asure you you are not crazy, but may just need to be more aware of your feelings. LIke me, I do get a little carried away. :rolleyes:

theresbeautyinu · Apr 20, 2009, 04:55 PM

Sometimes I get the mania, I guess... and I'm really not comfortable talking to people about this... but could you give some information please?

guitarlicks · Apr 26, 2009, 02:12 AM

Hey, I didn't have time to read all of the replies so I don't know EXACTLY what is going on. But I am 15 and I've kind of gone through what it sounds like your experiancing.

My best friend of 5 years decided to, well, for lack of a better term, decided to "leave" me also. No doubt this took a big toll on me and I was depressed for a few weeks and I still haven't heard from him in half a year but then I started playing GUITAR. It has been like a drug for me and I never feel alone while I'm playing it. I can't say that this is for everyone because obviously some people just don't want to play, but music has helped me get through a lot of hard times (suspended from school for a year, lost 4 family members within months of each other, drug abuse, etc.)
This is just a suggestion and if it doesn't work for you then at least you gave it a try which means you at least WANT to get better, but if it does work then GREAT :)

theresbeautyinu · Apr 26, 2009, 07:11 AM

I got a new best friend, that was my best friend from the start and I didn't realize it... but now I do... so I think I'm OK letting go of my ex best friend =)

Clough · Apr 26, 2009, 05:16 PM

Originally Posted by theresbeautyinu

what do you mean? are you mad at me?

One of the instruments that I teach is the violin. And no, I wasn't mad at you.

Thanks!

theresbeautyinu · Apr 26, 2009, 06:05 PM

mmk =) viiolins getting hard! The teacher don't NOT like me!!

Clough · Apr 26, 2009, 06:29 PM

What's getting hard about playing the violin, please? Maybe I can help you?

Thanks!

theresbeautyinu · Apr 26, 2009, 06:41 PM

the teacher! He pushes us to hard! And he just discourages me and it makes me play worse! =(

Clough · Apr 26, 2009, 06:57 PM

Okay, I could see pushing students to excel. I do that. Somebody's got to light the "flame" under the students. How is it that he discourages you, please?

Thanks!

theresbeautyinu · Apr 27, 2009, 12:02 PM

Because he tells us we're horrible and then he splits us up by who's better and who sucks.

Clough · Apr 27, 2009, 07:28 PM

If he actually tells you that some of you are horrible, I don't think that type of wording is appropriate. If this is in a school that has a principal or administrator, I would suggest reporting how he words things to some of you.

Do you want to continue playing the violin?

Thanks!

theresbeautyinu · Apr 28, 2009, 01:43 PM

Yes I do... and I'm going to have this teacher till I graduate.

Clough · Apr 28, 2009, 10:22 PM

Have you tried telling the teacher that what he says is hurtful or makes you feel badly?

Thanks!

theresbeautyinu · Apr 29, 2009, 02:59 PM

No, I'm afraid of him

Clough · Apr 30, 2009, 01:12 AM

I'm really sorry that you're afraid of him! However, if you let him know how you feel, then things might change.

What's the worst thing that could happen? Please think about that...

Thanks!

Clough · Apr 30, 2009, 01:15 AM

I would like to add that, if you would like some words and sentences to use in dealing with confronting him positively, proactively and constructively, I'm sure that we can come up with some ways to do and approach that here.

Thanks!