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    88sunflower's Avatar
    88sunflower Posts: 1,207, Reputation: 462
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    #41

    Apr 20, 2009, 12:30 PM
    Being gay shouldn't be compared to a disability. Its totally different. You can be attracted to the same sex and have a normal functioning life. Unlike most disabilities. I agree on both sides. I do think its born in you with out choice. But I think you have that choice of letting it show or not. I am sure there are thousands of people in the world with gay tendencies that have fought it off because of society. Although its more accepted today you have to be a strong person to come out to the world your gay.
    sGt HarDKorE's Avatar
    sGt HarDKorE Posts: 656, Reputation: 98
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    #42

    Apr 20, 2009, 08:33 PM

    I can't imagine people "choosing" to be gay. There is no benefits, and actually you lose rights compared being married to a woman. I have 2 beliefs on this topic. I feel that no matter what a person does NOT choose to be gay, but I feel that people are either born that way, and then some are made gay through tramatic experiences or somehow. Though there was something on the news once where there were 2 identical twins. I think they were around 7ish or so. One was your normal everyday boy who loves action and fghting and such. The other boy loved making his room all pink and having a girly room. He even painted his nails and loved playing with barbies and more girly things. When I saw this, I figured it couldn't be a choice, especially since the boy is so young. Obviously, there is a chance he isn't gay but I can't imagine he isn't. I don't think this young boy ever once ever decided to have girly tendencies or anything
    lighty's Avatar
    lighty Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #43

    Apr 21, 2009, 02:57 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by shazamataz View Post
    Sorry, I just had to add this...
    Are you gay or straight?

    Would you just sleep with another girl because you felt like it?
    I agree with turtle girl. It is personal and not one has the right to be judgemental under the garb of advice. Your mother is right to some extent and so are you. There is a genetic connection which give you the tendency but environment and circumstances do plays a big role. This is scientific and undisputable. Cheers!
    turtlegirl16's Avatar
    turtlegirl16 Posts: 177, Reputation: 1
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    #44

    Apr 21, 2009, 05:10 PM

    Thank you so much, lighty! That is the answer I wanted to hear that puts it all together!!
    turtlegirl16's Avatar
    turtlegirl16 Posts: 177, Reputation: 1
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    #45

    Apr 21, 2009, 05:15 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by artlady View Post
    Why aren't you asking them?
    These are your friends? If most of your friends are gay that is a good indication you are as well.People tend to hang with people who are like them.It's all good.You have to be with people who *get you* :)

    I suspect from your posts that you are struggling with some issue about your own orientation.

    I also sense a lot of anger in you.From a virtual point only but I do.

    For example,you have been told that you give out reddies for factually incorrect information. You continue to give them out whenever someone disagrees with your opinion.

    You are angry and I think you are in some sort of a issue about your own sexual preference and please know that we will help you to the best of ability.

    Being angry about things doesn't do much to change things.

    You need to be nicer to people around here if you want anyone to be nice back.




    The reason I don't ask my friends is because if I did, I probably wouldn't get the most sensible answer. And I wouldn't be able to put this site to good use. And we already settled the angry issue.
    Unknown008's Avatar
    Unknown008 Posts: 8,076, Reputation: 723
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    #46

    Jun 8, 2009, 11:43 AM

    Well, in tuition the past Friday, a group made a presentation on Gay Rights, and the issue turned out asking if gay depended on one's choice. The answer was that being gay or lesbian depends on two main factors, namely genetics and the environment where one lives. On the genetics side, say a mother have 7 girls. They said that studies showed that the 7th girl is more probably to be a lesbian. Of course, that's only a number, it could be any number, for the scientists do not know when do certain substances produced by the mother's body will 'convert' the fetus into a lesbian. I'm not telling you that being the 7th child of a family will be gay, but consecutive babies with the same sex tend to go towards being gay.

    Also,they said that if you had a gay child, there's 50% chance that the next child will be gay.

    Hope I helped clarified some things. (just saw lighty's post, which I find to fit with my answer as well.)
    griffers90's Avatar
    griffers90 Posts: 57, Reputation: 12
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    #47

    Jun 8, 2009, 11:55 AM
    I am bisexual and I did not choose to be this way I promise you. The day I became interested in physical and emotional relationships I realised I desired a physical relationship with either a man or a woman. There are however some people at the moment who view being gy or bisexual as being cool and pretend to be bisexual or gay. These people make a choice to wear a label but are not truly homosexual or bisexual.

    Whilst there is no scientific research to back up my opinion this has been my experience.

    Hope that helped...

    Griffers x
    hheath541's Avatar
    hheath541 Posts: 2,762, Reputation: 584
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    #48

    Jun 8, 2009, 11:57 AM

    Both of you are right. Most of my friends, and I, are either gay or bu and we've discussed the subject extensively. Some have known since they were very young that they were attracted to members of the same sex. Some didn't discover the attraction until around puberty, when most people start developing their sexuality. Some made a conscious decision to be gay, although not to the extent of going against the very grain of their personality. Some even admit that it was an event in their childhood that 'turned' them gay.

    Basically, every situation is unique. Even the lgbt community doesn't have a difinitive answer to that question.
    DrJ's Avatar
    DrJ Posts: 1,328, Reputation: 339
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    #49

    Jun 8, 2009, 11:58 AM

    I am quite surprised that someone on page 1 compared being gay to having downs syndrome or MS... and no one said anything.

    Wow...

    Anyway, did you, or anyone here, CHOOSE to be attracted to whatever gender you are attracted to? Was there a day in your life that you thought to yourself "hmmm.. should I like girls... or guys.. hmmm... I think.. I... will go with... ah hell, I'll just flip a coin!"

    Being truly homosexual or truly heterosexual is not just a choice. There are many things in your life and in your biochemistry that make you prone to one or the other.

    The reason I used the word "truly" is because there are heterosexual people pretending to be gay and there are homosexual pretending to be straight. And this has nothing to do with them.
    dreamingartist's Avatar
    dreamingartist Posts: 104, Reputation: 54
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    #50

    Jun 8, 2009, 02:36 PM
    I know I will get flamed for this but its my opinion and I stand up for what I believe in.

    Being a christian you follow what God says in the bible. In the bible SEX before marriage is refrenced to sin. So is stealing, cheating, lying, you name it. A sin is a sin. Everyone sins in this world. I lie, I drive too fast. In Gods eyes, me lying is just as bad as me having sex with a man or a woman. If you aren't religious, then hey, go for it, live your life and be as gay as you want or as straight as you want and think what you want. If you ARE religious, then know that you will never truly have a happy and meaningful relationship with God when you are not able to fully commit to his word and to him. JUST LIKE if you are addicted to drugs or pornography and straight as a blade, you may BE a christian and many Gay people are christians, but you have a sin in your life that you have to deal with and it makes religion very difficult if not impossible. Yes, I think Gay people will absolutely be in heaven! But I think that they have struggles they have to deal with and church sure doesn't make them feel better.

    Yes I think pornographers will be in heaven... but they have struggles and issues that make fully committing to Gods will difficult or impossible.

    God also says NOT to have sex before marriage, PERIOD. Regardless of being gay or not. So being gay isn't the issue, its.. are the Gay / or straight people having sex out of marriage, and living for themselves. Yes..

    So I wouldn't worry too much about Gay or Straight, but I'd worry about who are you living for, what are you living for, are you pleasing yourself? Or pleasing God.
    Unknown008's Avatar
    Unknown008 Posts: 8,076, Reputation: 723
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    #51

    Jun 9, 2009, 08:21 AM

    Ok... thanks Shazzy.

    Griffers90, I did not mention that people choose to be gay, but they can be made so if they get influenced by their surroundings. That is not a choice.

    Dr. Drizzle (:D) Some people say that the down's syndrome is linked with a person being gay in a certain way... I don't know if that's true :confused:
    Unknown008's Avatar
    Unknown008 Posts: 8,076, Reputation: 723
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    #52

    Jun 9, 2009, 08:22 AM

    Ok... thanks Shazzy.

    Griffers90, I did not mention that people choose to be gay, but they can be made so if they get influenced by their surroundings. That is not a choice.

    Dr. Drizzle (:D) Some people say that the down's syndrome is linked with a person being gay in a certain way... I don't know if that's true :confused:
    griffers90's Avatar
    griffers90 Posts: 57, Reputation: 12
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    #53

    Jun 9, 2009, 10:31 AM

    Hiya Unknown008 I wasn't suggesting you were wrong hun I understood your point exactly and agree with you! I just added my experience in to back you up :) You made a good point I don't know what influenced my sexuality but I never made a choice. I could have been genetically predisposed to being bisexual or influenced by my environment either are very likely. Either way I don't think that which view turtlegirl16 or her Mum takes matters as long as they do not become predjudiced against someone because of their sexuality.
    In short I agree with your point no one has a choice over the environment they are in so therefore it only makes sense they didn't choose their sexuality. :)
    Hope that cleared some stuff up. X
    Unknown008's Avatar
    Unknown008 Posts: 8,076, Reputation: 723
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    #54

    Jun 9, 2009, 11:00 AM

    Okay, now it's clear griffers90! :)
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #55

    Jun 9, 2009, 06:46 PM

    I believe that some people are born gay and some choose it.
    Kagan88's Avatar
    Kagan88 Posts: 70, Reputation: 9
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    #56

    Jun 23, 2009, 02:57 PM

    Sometimes I see this as and impossible question that seeks an impossible answer... In a world that is science vs religion what are we to think?
    jenniepepsi's Avatar
    jenniepepsi Posts: 4,042, Reputation: 533
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    #57

    Jun 23, 2009, 03:13 PM

    This should be in the discussions boards not the advise board really...


    I am of 2 minds. I believe that you are born predisposed to being homosexual.
    However, you can make the CHOICE to follow that lifestyle or not.
    jlove09's Avatar
    jlove09 Posts: 73, Reputation: 5
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    #58

    Jun 23, 2009, 09:52 PM

    I am a lesbian. No, I despise that word. I don't refer myself as a girl. All my exs are straight girls and they refer and see me was a guy.
    But, let me tell you. Its not genetic or a choice, you were born with it. Seriously, Ive tried being straight, trust me. I know Im very pretty as a girl and can date any guys I want but Im just not attracted to them. I feel comfortable being a guy and talking to them like brothers.
    hheath541's Avatar
    hheath541 Posts: 2,762, Reputation: 584
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    #59

    Jun 23, 2009, 10:30 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by jlove09 View Post
    I am a lesbian. No, i despise that word. I don't refer myself as a girl. All my exs are straight girls and they refer and see me was a guy.
    But, let me tell you. Its not genetic or a choice, you were born with it. Seriously, Ive tried being straight, trust me. I know Im very pretty as a girl and can date any guys I want but Im just not attracted to them. I feel comfortable being a guy and talkin to them like brothers.
    I know this has nothing to do with the original post, I'm just curious; are you planning on undergoing gender reassignment surgery?

    I'm not trying to be offensive. I know several people who are either planning on or in the process of transitioning. I think it takes a level of courage and determination that very few people can understand.
    AManWithNoName's Avatar
    AManWithNoName Posts: 424, Reputation: 9
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    #60

    Jun 23, 2009, 10:40 PM
    Why would any one choose to be gay!

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