[rol]

Can I rewind 8 months and do this instead!!

[Welsh lass]

Thank you for this advice, I rang him and he was upset that I didn't want to see him he said he really loved me, missed me but still wants to be on his own and he said you never know what will happen after the summer! (blimey how long does he think I will wait for him to sort his head out?? ) I felt bad so agreed in the end to meet up with him! A few hours later and I have sent him a text saying: to be honest I don't feel ready to meet up with you yet, I need more time to work on myself! (he hasn't replied) but I feel I would have been back to the start again if I see him! I feel I do have some power back now cause I'm not going to run to him when he calls!
One more thing he was telling me that he has had a piercing and sent a pic! (cause he knows I wouldn't like it!) is he trying to be rebellious?? I don't get it!

[talaniman]

Don't fret over a small thing and stay focused on you.

[rol]

<< he said he really loved me, missed me but still wants to be on his own and he said you never know what will happen after the summer! >>

What does he think he is?!
Good girl , do not meet him!!
Let him worry now he may be losing you. Best way in this circumstance is to get back to uncertaintly yourself.

[Welsh lass]

Guys I'm really having a down day! I have been doing well keeping busy, but went on to the myspace and saw that a girls been chatting to my ex (I know he's my ex but, its driving me crazy I want him back so much!) the relationship ended in the wierdest way ever and I can't get my head around it! (especially as he says he still loves me, misses me and that you never know what will happen in a few months etc. do you think he is just saying it, to lead me on, and to keep me hoping! Do you think he has moved on? Any advice on what I can do? I really need so much help!! Thanks

[RubyPitbull]

Okay W.L. I have stayed quiet for a while but I have been watching the postings. When you mentioned the piercing and "let's see what happens after the summer...", the way he broke it all off,. I didn't want to say anything because I didn't want you to be hurting. I thought that if you kept yourself busy and didn't have any contact, you would start feeling better, be able to move on and date other people. But, I guess this needs to be said. I hate for you to be so unhappy and down.

He has been showing signs of dating other people from the beginning. He is actively looking around. He may very well be in a relationship now. His telling you that he loves you.. and you never know what will happen in a few months,. is because he wants to keep you available if things don't work out on his end with whoever he is seeing. He is an incredibly selfish and immature guy. His maintaining limited contact with you is to feel around to see if you have figured it out. Since you hadn't, it keeps his options open. He can keep you dangling, while he goes out and has a good time. He is figuring if he meets someone better, great. If he doesn't, he can come back to you for a shag when he needs it. I suspect that when you broke up with him, it was a set up. He was being a jerk, getting you angry with him, so that you would break it off, and he wouldn't have to be the "bad" guy. He was dating other people at that time.

I know you are hurting. I know you want him back. I am so sorry. I don't normally do this. Especially since you are hurting so much today. But, you need to pull yourself together and push him out of your head! Go out with your friends. Keep busy. When you are ready, you will meet someone else. You need to forget about this guy.

Please do the things I suggested at the beginning of this posting. In the meantime, I am sure others will stop by and give you their thoughts, opinions, insights, and advice to help you move on.

[talaniman]

Lass, I hope you have been listening, as he has proven by his actions that he has no real feelings for what he is putting you through and I honestly feel you should have no contact with him no matter what. You have spent so much time effort and emotion on him, you are neglecting you and your life. I urge you to close that chapter in your life and move on to a happier place without him. In your own words You can't love some one if you don't love your self first. Put your self first, and leave him alone.

[RubyPitbull]

Tal, sorry I have to spread the love,. (Lass please ignore this, has nothing to do with you)

Lass, please listen to Tal. He is a very insightful person. He is right on target.

[Welsh lass]

Thanks for the advice guys! I really am taking it all in, and I am feeling stronger day by day! I am not contacting him and I don't think I want to be friends with him, well not yet and probably not for a long time! I am happy and finding myself again! Yay! Obviousy I will have down days but I really feel like I'm getting back on track! Thanks

[Welsh lass]

Hello, well just thought I would fill you all in! Not been contacting him (the ex) at all, had a text off him today asking to come visit me I said yes cause I feel much happier and stronger now (yay!) everything was cool, chatted like mates, I think a friendship mite come out of this! I have no hope anymore of us getting back. I think I'm sorting myself out! Wahey! (he still says he loves me, he doesn't have a girl friend, he wants a single life! -typical man! Sorry no being prejudice). :)

[RubyPitbull]

Thanks for updating us WL. Keep up the good work and the good spirits! :)