[mmn]

I clearly agree! Apparently you have never had to deal with a spouse in prison. My husband has been in for 3 yrs and still has 4 to 7 yrs more. I love him and have stood by him with my kids but damn do you understand the loneliness that follows with this life. We did not ask them to make those choices to go. So why in the world should we be criticized for wanting to be happy and move on with our life. THey should have realized what they had before they made the choices they did to get locked up. YOu know what you also do not understand the financial strain and the constant visits and what the kids deal with. SO to the one who wrote this post go for it girl. I wish I had the balls to do it. Please be happy for us who won't!

[joanie820]

My name is Joan, and my husband is sentenced to 85 percent of 3 years in prison. It is a hard struggle, and I don't like the way I have been there for him and he acts like a child and its all everyone else's fault. I have done and said everything to him to show my devotion, but its like he doesn't see it or he is so busy feeling sorry for himself that he is pushing my help away. Have only been recently thinking of divorce and that's only because I don't trust his motives once he is released, and Im scared he will try to get everything I have been working for while he was away. Im hoping he is learning from the courses he is offered while in there and is able to grow as a person, or he will just be like the magority of prisoners in the fact when the get out follow the same old patterns. Oh well, thanks for the ear, take care. Joan New Jersey

[MinisterKatina]

Wow, this is very good. This is where I was in 2004 when I so called thought the grass was greener getting involved with another inmate who was on his way home. I left my marriage for another man and was wrong. God started dealing with me very severely for leaving my husband incarcerated for some other man who to be honest did not have my best interest at heart. I remember going down to the prison and telling my husband that I am gone. In all the time he had been in prison, he never went on lock up. That day he was so devastated when I told him bye. I was selfish-senseless and crazy. Do you know God said this to me, Someone being in prison does not give me or anyone a right to treat them any type of way, and I needed to apologize and ask for his forgiveness. It is for better or worse no matter where he or she is. God's words does not change based on our ignorance. It is not easy having a relationship with someone incarcerated however that is the road you chose to take. They are human too and it does not give no one the right to treat them as if they are nothing especially when we did marry them. I agree our character is on the line and it is not right. I paid a heavy price for leaving him and that was 2004, 2006 I was back down there looking like death because that other man almost put me in prison. Nothing was right for me until I decided to go make it right. I will say this, count the cost of a thing before doing it. There are consequences one will pay if you do not follow through whether you knew or not. Right is right and wrong is wrong no matter who it is or who is doing it. God does not change his word, his mind or his character based on us as humans. I have not and let me repeat this September 2012 ad I divorced him 2004, NO relationships have worked since then. God closes the door. However my ex husband and I are the best of friends! He still loves me just as he did when we met in Aug 2001.. he still says to me I am still his wife. He still wants to remarry me. What man you know does that? Whether he is prison or out... men can move on very quickly however he says he still loves me and in love with me. We have an awesome relationship. I say all of this to say that we have to PRAY first, wait for the answer.. and do not think you will treat incarcerated men any type of way because you are so called on the outside. You may have to go back for your life to be restored by him or her!