[ka1]

Kctiger, this is simple. 1. If I don't have love, or lost my love because utltimately she says she can't give me or the relationship the simple time or work that would make us work, because of some of the stuff said, like she does not have the time to put into, and I reject that premise. Because that is false. She has time. You have time. This is the same thing that parents or married couples say so often and then people wonder why they divorce or their kids can't stand them. You just used an excuse that dumpers use, “I can't because I'm busy.” Well, IF and I stress the IF the girl is as good as you say, then you should buck up and carve up the time. Becaue it's there.

I'm hurt, but make no mistake, my ex F%&^CKED up. That's easy to know when everyone in her life tells her that. That's not just my opinion, she did. And you're telling me that you are not going to get with this girl because you think you don't have time?? Again, poor excuse because its not true. You have it. Now why you won't give it. That's another thing, but don't sit and give me the excuse that so many dumpers use, man. Com on.

[ka1]

Some opinions are right. Some are wrong. It's that simple. You other commitments are not the problem. You have the time.

[kctiger]

Ka I am doing all I can not get to absolutely pissed at your mode of thinking right now. I am done with this. I DO NOT care what you think of my response, or of me for that matter. Think what you want. Good luck to you! Been a plessure, as always. I would truly appreciate you not lumping me into the same mold you have for everyone else who uses a "lame excuse."

I guess, if I didn't value sleeping and exercising, and eating healthy, then yes, I do have time to have a full on relationship. Man, you are right! Thanks for showing me the error in my ways, and thanks for letting me know my opinion is wrong. You should be an expert.

In the end, it comes down to prioritizing. Right now, being in a romantic relationship with someone is just not one of my higher priorities. Good enough for you?

[UnluckyDucky]

Kctiger, this is simple. 1. If I don’t have love, or lost my love because utltimately she says she can’t give me or the relationship the simple time or work that would make us work, because of some of the stuff said, like she does not have the time to put into, and I reject that premise. Because that is false. She has time. You have time. This is the same thing that parents or married couples say so often and then people wonder why they divorce or their kids can’t stand them. You just used an excuse that dumpers use, “I can’t because I’m busy.” Well, IF and I stress the IF the girl is as good as you say, then you should buck up and carve up the time. Becaue its there.

I’m hurt, but make no mistake, my ex F%&^CKED up. That’s easy to know when everyone in her life tells her that. That’s not just my opinion, she did. And you’re telling me that you are not gonna get with this girl because you think you don’t have time??? Again, poor excuse because its not true. You have it. Now why you won’t give it. That’s another thing, but don’t sit and give me the excuse that so many dumpers use, man. Com on.

Dude, seriously... trying to analyze and break down what someone's intentions and words mean when they dump you is almost as productive as pounding sand. You think she gives a crap that you "reject her premise"? Do you think I give a crap if you "reject her premise?" You can't argue emotion with logic.. again, that is an exercise in futility.

The one with the clear problem here you and the delusional realilty that you seem to be harboring for this breakup. You are fighting tooth and nail against the fact that it is over. Done. Kaput. Gonzo. Fin. Finito. Dead. I could keep going here but hopefully you've gotten the point. What are you trying to prove to everyone and yourself by continually arguing and asking these questions that are essentially a reiteration or slight variation of prior questions that are almost completely pointless? I understand and encourage the need to vent - that's fine and dandy.. but you seem posting here just looking for a fight - looking for an argument that you don't agree with and latching on to it.

Back to kc's point, you also forget that is is NOT JUST ABOUT TIME but about being mentally prepared. I like how you completely ignored my prior post and arguments by the way, smooth. May I refer you to look back and take a look at what I wrote.

Who gives a flying squirrel's butt WHY or WHAT excuses our ex's give? The majority of the time they typically A. do not really know, B. are just trying to be nice, C. or are lying. If you can't accept this I don't think anyone here can help you. Good luck to you and the delusional world you live in.

[liz28]

Tal I think it is time to close this thread because the op is being dificult and a little insulting towards some memebers. Put the padlock on it.

[jmw0713]

That is why "dating" is called "dating". You are seeing other people, but not flinging yourself headlong into a relationship. These things take time and effort on both sides. It is up to both people honestly communicate their feelings and intentions to each other.

Like KC, I am dating as well. All the girls that I have talked to or dated have been very nice and attractive. However, as of right now, I like where I am at in life, being on my own. My past relationship burnt me out emotionally, to the point where I don't want a girlfriend RIGHT NOW. I know in a few months, or whatever, I will think otherwise.

People have there priorities in life. Mine right now are to meet new people and have fun doing what I want, when I want. KC's priorities are to better himself through education and volunteer work. KA your priorities involve trying to find another partner. There is nothing wrong with any of these!

The point I'm trying to make is, we all have different priorities in life. We all live our lives our own way. Some people always want or need to be in a relationship with someone, others can live on their own for periods. Everyone is different. No one who replied to this thread is wrong or right. You can't tell someone they are living their life in the wrong way, just like you can't tell someone they are living their life the right way. Why? Everyone is different and has there own way of going about things.

[Romefalls19]

I got to side with my man KC on this one, when I first broke up with my ex and for months afterward, I didn't have time nor did I want to be in a relationship. I had too much on my plate, working two jobs, doing two a days at the gym to get myself confidence back and get in better shape. I couldn't care less about being in a relationship, sure I saw girls, hooked up with some even but I didn't care if I saw them once or everyday of the week. I also could care less if the girl text or called me after we hung out. I had more on my plate than to worry about some clingy girl trying to make me re-evaluate my priorities and make time for her. I make time for who I want, I live life on my own accord. Now I am in a relationship, still go to the gym but quit one job and go to the gym after my kids are asleep.

It's how someone feels, if they are ready to settle down for a relationship, so be it but if they aren't who the hell are you to judge them for what they feel they have time for

[ka1]

That is why "dating" is called "dating". You are see other people, but not flinging yourself headlong into a relationship. These things take time and effort on both sides. It is up to both people honestly communicate their feelings and intentions to each other.

Like KC, I am dating as well. All the girls that I have talked to or dated have been very nice and attractive. However, as of right now, I like where I am at in life, being on my own. My past relationship burnt me out emotionally, to the point where I don't want a girlfriend RIGHT NOW. I know in a few months, or whatever, I will think otherwise.

.

Now that is logical. Of course you did not say you did not have time. Which is my whole point from start. I'm not insulting Ktiger personally, I'm insulting the premise, as it was not true. Uglyducking I did refer back to your points but got the name wrong. Thought you were chuff.

[UnluckyDucky]

Now that is logical. Of course you did not say you did not have time. Which is my whole point from start. I'm not insulting Ktiger personally, I'm insulting the premise, as it was not true. Uglyducking i did refer back to your points but got the name wrong. thought you were chuff.

You still got the name wrong buddy (it is UnluckyDucky, not Uglyduckling btw) but I don't take that stuff personal. Now you're just name calling! ;)

The point is that you are facing a reality which you must learn to accept. In the long run, can you honestly say that any excuses that your ex gave you really truly matter? No, they don't. She's already made up her mind for whatever reason and you can argue and/or refute that it is BS and the like until you are blue in the face but that doesn't change the situation.

[kctiger]

Now that is logical. Of course you did not say you did not have time. Which is my whole point from start. I'm not insulting Ktiger personally, I'm insulting the premise, as it was not true. Uglyducking i did refer back to your points but got the name wrong. thought you were chuff.

This is getting stupid. I guess you misunderstood me, or I didn't explain it well. I NEVER would tell someone I "don't have time for you." That is just poor tact. When I am ready to be in a full fledged relationship, then I will be, but, like Rome was before he met his fiancé, and like JMW is now, I would rather just have fun and not over complicate anything. That is my entire point. Is is about people's priorities, that is all. I have a lot of other things I want to accomplish before I dive into a serious commitment to a human being. Is this making any sense? If I wanted to, YES, I could be in a relationship, although probably not a very healthy one. I am just not ready, nor do I give a sh** about being a boyfriend right now...

[talaniman]

Nice vent Ka1, you should feel better getting that poison out in this rant.

I know your still raw from being hurt, and these guys know it too, but no need to be insulting, but stubborn is allowed, as we all seem to be that.

I know for a fact, KC, Rome, UD, and the others have been through the mill themselves, and I think reading their stories (talk about hard headed... er... stubborn), will give you some good insights into your own feelings, and some reasons to be hopeful with your healing.

[friend4u178]

Hi Ka1
I know your hurting and it sucks , but to me it just seems your in denial.

We can go back and forwards about the "don't have time" theory and all the other bla bla bla , but the Bottom line is if she doesn't want to be with you she will give whatever excuse she can think of , wthout even knowing what it means herself.

I think all the guys/gals on this thread have given you some real good advice and its time for you to accept it and just move on.

No point wasting your energy on wondering about the ifs and buts of what someone else is thinking.

[ka1]

Move on, OK. Accept or agree never.

[friend4u178]

Move on, ok.

Good move!

Accept or agree never.

No problem , that's your choice.