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    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #21

    Apr 11, 2008, 12:11 PM
    " maybe there is a shot for us in the long run but i don't want a relationship right now"
    Respect his wishes, and don't push it. When someone tells you that back off, and focus on other things, as his feelings have changed, and don't match what you want.
    Jiser's Avatar
    Jiser Posts: 1,266, Reputation: 281
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    #22

    Apr 11, 2008, 05:23 PM
    Its real hard when someone tells you that, your whole world crashes around you. The best thing you can do is give what they want and develop a thick skin.

    Keep yourself busy, don't pester them, in fact leave them alone completely. If nothing happens after a week or so time to have an honest talk.
    easilyamusd's Avatar
    easilyamusd Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
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    #23

    Apr 12, 2008, 06:11 AM
    Well he texted me last night saying " i just want to make sure you're okay" then he called. And said that we are done for now but I will see him tomorrow which is today. If he is compeletley done why will I see him? He said he feels it is too soon for him to see me but maybe it is the right thing to do. I am so confused!! I want him back so badly
    easilyamusd's Avatar
    easilyamusd Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
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    #24

    Apr 12, 2008, 06:37 AM
    Why doesn't he want me right now?
    Ok I know this is a typical question most people ask but I need advice. Me and my boyfriend rarely fight and rarely disagree. We have so much fun when we are together. But My boyfriend of 5 months wants to take a break and I don't!! He said he love's me but is not "in love" with me and he thinks we should at least take a break. He has been overwhelmed these past two days but we spent the weekend together and had a blast. Why did this all of the sudden happen? We have not talked since we said that. How/What do I say to get him to try to make this relationship work? We are young so being "in love" should come later. So I think we should focus on being happy and having fun right now not too serioud of stuff. What do I do?

    4/10well he texted me yesterday saying these exact words " maybe there is a shot for us in the long run but i don't want a relationship right now" we used to spend a lot of time together until we realized it was hurting us so we decided to only see each other at school and have a date once or twice a week. Well at first he said he wanted a break so I said okay we can take a break and he texted back " no we're breaking up" I don't get it. He has never acted like this before. Even his friends who have known him longer than me think this is werid. I have not texted him or called him since he texted me that so I am proud of myslef for doing that but I don't know what to do I have class with him on Monday because spring break will be over but he sits right next to me what do I do??

    4/11well he texted me last night saying " i just want to make sure you're okay" then he called. And said that we are done for now but I will see him tomorrow which is today. If he is compeletley done why will I see him? He said he feels it is too soon for him to see me but maybe it is the right thing to do. I am so confused!! I want him back so badly
    COOKIE MONSTER's Avatar
    COOKIE MONSTER Posts: 589, Reputation: 56
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    #25

    Apr 12, 2008, 06:53 AM
    Give up hun he sounds like he wants you to sit about like a fool and wait until he wants to pick you up again he's messing with your head don't see him today and I wouldn't speak to him Monday with his 'we are done for now'' rubbish he either wants you or he doesn't

    BOTTOM LINE-you've broke up,move on,stop letting him mess with your head,let him find some one else to mess with its not fair on you so don't let him do it

    START NO CONTACT ,NO TEXIS,NO CALLS ,NO EMAILS,NO MEETING UP NO NOTHING
    It's the BEST THING FOR YOU
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #26

    Apr 12, 2008, 06:54 AM
    Its called having his cake and eating it too. He can enjoy your company when he wants, without a commitment to be exclusive. This will also plays on your wish to be back together, and keeps you close, as a back up in case his other plans fall thru. You can stop all this confusion, by just cutting all contact with him, period. Don't be fed false hope, by the crumbs of his attentions, you deserve better so stand up for yourself.
    easilyamusd's Avatar
    easilyamusd Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
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    #27

    Apr 12, 2008, 07:11 AM
    He aimed my best friends last night asking if I was okay and she said well I know how she is why don't you ask her yourself. Apperently she said that he thought I was over him because I wasn't annoying him with texts and calls buts its not true. I know we shouldn't meet today but we need to have a serious talk and out of all honesty should I kiss him? I know it might work but I don't know if it is a good idea I know it's proabably not. But what should I do I need to have a talk with him.
    COOKIE MONSTER's Avatar
    COOKIE MONSTER Posts: 589, Reputation: 56
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    #28

    Apr 12, 2008, 07:24 AM
    No Don't Kiss Him Don't Hug Him Just Say Hi And Get On With Your Serious Chat
    easilyamusd's Avatar
    easilyamusd Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
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    #29

    Apr 12, 2008, 07:27 AM
    Why not ? Just a question I won't but why not?
    Marriedguy's Avatar
    Marriedguy Posts: 474, Reputation: 115
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    #30

    Apr 12, 2008, 07:34 AM
    This relationship is done; you have to come to terms with this. All relationships don't have happy endings; some people wake up one day and decide they no longer want to be with a person. In this case sounds likes he does not want to be in a committed relationship I could thing of several reasons as to why he feels this way but it's pointless to do so.

    Cut him out of your life and center yourself. Then get back into the dating game and trust me your will find some that will love you, be in love with you and want to be with you until death till you part.
    COOKIE MONSTER's Avatar
    COOKIE MONSTER Posts: 589, Reputation: 56
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    #31

    Apr 12, 2008, 07:37 AM
    Because he's playing games with you that's why not

    Just meet up say what you have to say listen to what he says don't be begging to get back together because he says he's in love with you but he's not in love with you what a load of crap,he either does or doesn't he wants relationship but not now

    Sounds like he's chatting s**t to me n just wants you their when he wants sex but doesn't want a girlfriend he has to awnser to or the commitment

    Id walk away and get on with your life don't wait
    Marriedguy's Avatar
    Marriedguy Posts: 474, Reputation: 115
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    #32

    Apr 12, 2008, 08:01 AM
    OMG Easilyamusd is not smart. You want to get back with him. If this conversation leads to you two getting back together you are on board with it. I should NOT get back with him. This is a person that decided out of the blue that he was not in love with you. You are setting yourself to be hurt again.

    Your BFF is not your BFF because she would not entertain any conversation with your ex. The conversation should have gone like this:
    Ex- boyfriend: Hello…hey this is <insert ex's name here>
    BFF- What? I know you didn't call me. You and Easyilyamusd are not together anymore, you don't call me, speak to me, you “A” hole, how could you hurt my girl like that. I wanted to beat the crap out of your punk “A” but Easilyamusd told not to. Let me but very clear DON'T YOU EVER, EVER CALL THIS NUMBER. Then she hangs up.

    LEAVE HIM ALONE HE TOLD YOU HE IS NOT IN LOVE WITH YOU. HE TOLD NOT TO CALL HIM OR CONTACT HIM. THEN YOU GET WORD THAT HE WANTS TO MEET WITH YOU AND YOU LIKE OK.

    “aa, duh, which way did he go, hmm, duh which way did he go”

    Listen to CookieMonster!
    COOKIE MONSTER's Avatar
    COOKIE MONSTER Posts: 589, Reputation: 56
    Senior Member
     
    #33

    Apr 12, 2008, 10:41 AM
    Do you give advice and not take your own advice that you give others because I've just realised I haven't been,think I should really start listening to my own advice lol


    Hope your reading this mark!!
    LostInHisEyez's Avatar
    LostInHisEyez Posts: 130, Reputation: 15
    Junior Member
     
    #34

    Apr 12, 2008, 11:46 AM
    Listen, even though you have feelings for him, it was only 5 months, and he said he wasn't "in love" with you. He can care about you and text you, but that doesn't mean he wants to be with you. I went through something like this with my boyfriend, we broke up -and he didn't want to get back, he still texted me like nothing ever happened -but we weren't together. Just move on, and when/if he grows up and realizes that he wants to be in a relationship again that's when he can text you to see if you're okay. Don't even bother with it for now, move on and have fun with some friends.
    healer's Avatar
    healer Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #35

    Apr 12, 2008, 02:01 PM
    Marriedguy, you're judging her BFF too harshly; she handled the situation perfectly by not getting involved in the drama.

    EasilyAmused, show up at class WITH class. You are behaving beautifully with amazing self control. NEVER chase. Show up at school with your head held high: hair curled, make up perfect, glowing and FUN. This is HIS loss, make him feel the burn.

    Love,
    healer

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