[chris28]

If you want to get over it, then it might be best if you just stopped talking to her. I know what you mean about being a security blanket, and you should not have to be anyones security blanket.

Talk to her whenever you are ready and whenever you feel like it, and if you never feel like it, you might be better off.

Yea the reason I don't want to call or anything is because I don't want to go backwards but its hard I'm pretty depressed.

[nauticalstar420]

Don't be depressed hun (I know its hard, but try). This is part of the break up process. You have to re-adjust yourself and your life and get yourself used to it being just you, not you and her. For some people, breaking up is a quick process, and for others it can take a lot of time to get used to it.

If you feel that calling her is a step in the wrong direction, then you know that calling her wouldn't be a good idea. You want to move forward, not backward. :)

[chris28]

2nd day now still no call and not bad urges thinking about her today but talked and hung out with family had a nice day

[nauticalstar420]

Well good for you! I'm glad you had a nice time with family! Just remember to take it one step at a time. :)

[chris28]

I no and I'm so impatient lol

[nauticalstar420]

I know how that feels, I'm an impatient person too sometimes :p

Just keep your mind on other things. Hanging out with family today was a good idea. Keep doing things like that. You can do it!

[chuff]

yea the reason i dont wanna call or anything is because i dont wanna go backwards but its hard im pretty depressed.

Start working out. If you can get a gym membership, if you can't afford one go for a run or just a walk. Exercise release endorphins inside your brain which make you feel better. Plus working out helps you sleep and focus.

Also watch comedy movies or stand up comedians. Put yourself in a situation where you will be laughing or where at least there are funny things coming into your head.

The problem most people have when it comes to dealing with depressing situations like a break up is they stop and focus on it so much they lose track of all the good things around them. It's vital that you put that in your life right now. I'm not saying you won't think about her or the break up but I'm saying that it will help alleviate the thoughts and the pain over the next few weeks and months.

[chris28]

Start working out. If you can get a gym membership, if you can't afford one go for a run or just a walk. Exercise release endorphins inside your brain which make you feel better. Plus working out helps you sleep and focus.

Also watch comedy movies or stand up comedians. Put yourself in a situation where you will be laughing or where at least there are funny things coming into your head.

The problem most people have when it comes to dealing with depressing situations like a break up is they stop and focus on it so much they lose track of all the good things around them. It's vital that you put that in your life right now. I'm not saying you won't think about her or the break up but I'm saying that it will help alleviate the thoughts and the pain over the next few weeks and months.

Yes I hhave a member ship and I'm starting once I get back to work mon or tues :) can't sleep too much now I wake up and think and then can't go back to sleep :( we will see 1 day at a time

[chris28]

This is my 3rd day no contact and I can't stop thinking what's wrong with me my g/f was not happy with me and I no its not going to work sooo why is it so dam hard anyway?? Ughhhhhhhh

[kelsey100892]

OK hun, if u know its not ganna work out y stay wit her? Your young, go for diff girls, there's a lot more. My boyfriend n me just broke up yesterday (no lie) he wanted his x and I wasn't letting him touch me either, yea we kissed n held hands but he wanted (more) which I wasn't willing to give him. She might not be ready for that yet. Talk to her. Not in front of your friends or hers, pull her to the side n talk to her aobut it. Trust me, if u don't, it'll b awkward.lol.
<3,
~a concerned 15 year old friend~

[chris28]

Wednesday will be one week for no contact but today she texted me cause she waanted her things dropped off so we spoke a bit and I will drop her stuff off at a friends house 2 day or early this week I'm kind of depressed about that but its over I gues and that's just that :(

[nauticalstar420]

I'm sorry you have to go through that, returning the other person's things can be heartbreaking.

Is she going to be at the friends house when you drop her things off?

[chris28]

I'm sorry you have to go through that, returning the other person's things can be heartbreaking.

Is she going to be at the friends house when you drop her things off?

No she will not be there... :(

[nauticalstar420]

Well that's actually a good thing. Seeing her face to face, in person, could just stir up all of those sad emotions all over again.

I am proud of you for going so long without contact. It will get better soon, all of this is just part of the breakup process :)

What have you been doing to keep yourself busy and your mind off this?

[retta91206]

hello im new to this site but i stumbled upon your Question im sorry to hear about you n your grl im sure it hurts when your with someone that long but you have to look at it this way everything happens for a reason....i know thats not something you wanna hear but hunny its true....but the thing that gets me the most is that you said her family is pretty wealthy right well she knew coming in to this that you arent as fortunate to have a wealthy family and that money just doesnt grow in ya backyard and if she really cares for you then she would be willing to sacrifice a few things that she wants because its exactly that a want not a need....now for the coping part hunny you need to get out and meet new ppl jus to chill wit and get to know grlz and guys dont jus sit around worrying wether you should call her or worry about her live your life theres alot of cool ppl out there try the net ive met a lot of ppl from the computer and i have a ton of friends its really cool because i can go on lil vaca. and know ive got some where to stay and ill alwayz have ppl to turn to ya know well i hope this makes you feel a lil better if not sorry =( jus remember there is alwayz other fish in the sea lol well you have a good day .......................
~! PeAcE ReTtA

[chris28]

Well thats actually a good thing. Seeing her face to face, in person, could just stir up all of those sad emotions all over again.

I am proud of you for going so long without contact. It will get better soon, all of this is just part of the breakup process :)

What have you been doing to keep yourself busy and your mind off of this?

Well I text her back a few times about feelings and all I even said I care for her allot. I did not say that I need her back at least. I will drop all her things off tonight at her friends house. The way I have been dealing with it is staying with family I don't have much friends that I want to stay with now there in different places then me so I'm doing the family thing at this point. What I really want to do no is start meeting new friends I live in brooklyn ny and there a lot of cool new people to meet just got to start putting myself out there that the hard part...

[chris28]

hello im new to this site but i stumbled upon your Question im sorry to hear about you n your grl im sure it hurts when your with someone that long but you have to look at it this way everything happens for a reason....i know thats not something you wanna hear but hunny its true....but the thing that gets me the most is that you said her family is pretty wealthy right well she knew coming in to this that you arent as fortunate to have a wealthy family and that money just doesnt grow in ya backyard and if she really cares for you then she would be willing to sacrifice a few things that she wants because its exactly that a want not a need....now for the coping part hunny you need to get out and meet new ppl jus to chill wit and get to know grlz and guys dont jus sit around worrying wether you should call her or worry about her live your life theres alot of cool ppl out there try the net ive met a lot of ppl from the computer and i have a ton of friends its really cool because i can go on lil vaca. and know ive got some where to stay and ill alwayz have ppl to turn to ya know well i hope this makes you feel a lil better if not sorry =( jus remember there is alwayz other fish in the sea lol well you have a good day .......................

Thanks for the positive thought. I wanted to say that she did sacrifice some things I don't think she intended this to work out this way it sort of just did I guess when your accustemed to certain things or a life style that's what your use to and expect... Or maybee she's just really not into me as much as I thought. At this point I'm pretty convinced its over I have not completely excepted it yet but I understand and I still do not even hate her. I don't no if that will change but I can honestly say I love her and that's it. I feel stronger when I talk about it or write about it. I am scared of being alone not for ever but right now I am. And like I said many times I really need to put myself out there to meet new friends I'm kind of shy and have a hard time sparking conversations once I get to no someone I'm pretty good at it but. It's the starting I have a problem with... I love all the advice I have been getting and yes it is definitely helping...

[nauticalstar420]

Well i text her back a few times about feelings and all i even said i care for her allot. I did not say that i need her back at least. I will drop all her things off tonight at her friends house. The way i have been dealing with it is staying with family i dont have much friends that i wanna stay with now there in different places then me so im doing the family thing at this point. what i really wanna do no is start meeting new friends i live in brooklyn ny and there alot of kewl new people to meet just gotta start putting myself out there that the hard part.....

Well good luck, I hope you make lots of new friends.

Just stay on the right track and you will start to feel better soon. :)

[chris28]

Just wanted to let everyone what is helping me me and girlfriend broke up on Wednesday with contact she finally texted me today to ask for me to drop her things off to a friends house. So I did that today after we text back and forth a few time I was saddened and depressed for a few hours then I came on this site and got some assistance andt t it helped some and after that I went to Google and did a search for "how to get over a break up" tons of info came up here is one for example How to Get Over a Bad Break Up - wikiHow there are a lot more please do not pay for any all the free ones I read already helped a ton... here is a small line I got from one of the sites "Listen to a song that makes you feel empowered and happy. Make it your new anthem for your new life. (Try "I Will Survive" by Gloria Gaynor or "Go Your Own Way," by Fleetwood Mac, or "I'm Still Standing", by Elton John, or "Ruby Red" by Jann Arden.) Do it as often as you need to" reading on those sites made me feel like a million bucks I feel good at this moment and hope this continues. Hope all is feeling well through these hard timessss.

[nauticalstar420]

I'm so glad you found something to help you! Good job! I am so happy you are feeling better!