[Homegirl 50]

Well we have been together for 2 1/2 years now. We moved in together after being together for about 7 or 8 months. He cheated months before we moved in together. and we are rushing marriage or anything now.. i mean we pretty much are married anyways. i think im gonna take an entire week to just think about everything by myself to make my decision. and if i do decide to stay i know that i can never mention this to him again.

Why did you move in with him after he finally got with this girl he wanted in the first place?
How old is the baby you have? Maybe you're dealing with some postpartum depression. Or were you thinking all of this before the child was born. Why is it you two never married? I guess I'm old fashion. I don't understand when people say they are in no hurry to marry, but they live together and make babies.

[Homegirl 50]

If you decide to stay with him, then you need to get some counseling to help you deal with these feelings, otherwise you are going to be miserable and you will make his life miserable.

[Williams925]

No our relationship wasn't built on anger. We never fought for the first few months... not even one fight. It was great.. and I felt the same way he did and I didn't want to just be with somebody. We did know each other for about 3 months before we got together.. that's why I said we fell in love when we first kissed.. not really first sight. My baby is 1 month old... and off and on I think about these things. We began to fight about whether to abort or keep our baby... we both wanted to keep the baby... but at the time there were so many things getting in the way of that.. so on my own I made that decision and he was esspecially upset about it. Then we argued about this girl. I never thought that he cheated on me with her... but she would always give me a hard time and I knew she wanted him so I didn't want them talking together.. that's what we fought about. And I didn't know he cheated until we had already moved in together. She stalked me for a while and months after we were living together she told me what happened. And.. we're not getting married because I don't want to. He wants to because he says its swearing ourselves to each other in front of God. But- can't I do that without marriage? Why spend all that money for a one day thing? It wouldn't change anything about our relationship.. except a piece of paper.

[Homegirl 50]

Well you don't HAVE to spend a lot of money on a wedding and if something happened to the marriage it protects the child finacially. If something happens to him you and your daughter are protected. No arguments, no fighting to get help. But that's beside the point.
Again, stay if you want, but get some counseling, otherwise you are going to make yourself and him miserable.
Another question, what was he doing and saying while this girl stalking you?

[Williams925]

Just that she was crazy. I mean- she was! She wasn't telling me anything about him, just constantly sending me nasty texts emails messages on my phone. But nways-- I have decided to leave him. I don't want to be with anyone right now but when I do I want to be with someone new and have a clean slate. Probably won't be for many years since I have two children. But that's better than feeling horrible all the time.

[Homegirl 50]

This may be the best way. You're not going through the drama of the relationship and you can concentrate on your children. I wish the best for you and your children.