[SAB123]

I agree, I would love for my ex one day to say she's sorry for breaking up with me sooo many times. It would make me feel pretty good inside.

[Sandstorm99]

Yes send the apology letter. You have nothing to lose after 15 months of no contact. You will get an answer if she misses you enough to work things out or you will get no answer and that is a way to finally have your closure you need to move on.

[Geoffersonairplane]

I think that if you are doing it with the true intention of saying sorry (which I genuinely think you are) then yes, send it.

Saying sorry for wrongdoing and truly meaning it with no expectations shows good character and you have obviously seen the errors of your ways, whatever they were.

Good for you chap..

[SameOldSituation]

Yeah man... I think that was good. I'd send it for sure.

Careful, though. Don't expect a response. I think sometimes when we feel guilty and know how to apologize/make it right... on SOME level... we may expect a response. Remember to be happy with the fact that you've realized a lot and are making up for it... and that's all.

I know you already know all this.

[randomguy19]

Thanks for the response guys... I just feel bad and truly want to say sorry. I don't want her thinking I'm trying to get back with her or "stalk" her or anything.. Just a sorry..

[talaniman]

I'm not questioning your motives mind you but after 15 months I think you should look to the future. I've read all your other posts and this one stuck,

She left me for another guy, and to this day I still wonder if I truly loved her or if I was addicted.

I think your guilt may be displaced and you owe no apology whatsoever. Many relationship break up and yours is no different, guilt tripping is dangerous and unhealthy, because it obscures other facts, like she had another in the wings, so forget the letter, and her once and for all. Sorry I know how bad you would love to feel better, but taking on the guilt of a cheater, is not the way to go.

[randomguy19]

I don't know for a fact that she cheated on me. I had big feelings that I was cheated on however. Regardless if she cheated or not I still feel bad for some of the things I said that most likely contributed to the break up. Should I still send it?

[talaniman]

Absolutely NOT!!!!!

[emopunk7]

Did she say sorry to you? Why would you say sorry to her? Also, she left you... Why would you be sorry? If she really loved you, she would've tried to fix things with you... Not break up! Don't send it!

[randomguy19]

I sent the letter, I know some disagreed and some agreed. But I just wanted to say sorry to her because I know I wasn't the best boyfriend. After I sent the letter me and her started talking again. She told me she still has some feelings for me. She also said that she "wanted" to come back to me after she broke up with me but it was too late. As soon as she broke up with me she started sleeping with a 40 year old man (she was 17 going on 18). She now has a baby by him and is living with him. What I don't understand is that if she truly cared for me why didn't she stay single after she broke up with me? I just have a feeling that she wasn't totally honest and like I said, there may have been some cheating. The bad part about it.. I still have some feelings for her.. I miss what we had.. And I miss her.. But she's taken by the older man. I know there are other people out there but I guess I still have deep feelings because she was my only true girlfriend and I lost my virginity to her. I pray that there is a true girl out there for me.

[mckenzie134]

Definitely do not send anything... You now blame yourself for her leaving. Come on man Wake UP SHE had another guy she should be the one who is apologizing...

15 months have gone by and you miss her a bit and you think maybe you contributed to the break up.

Well let me tell you something no matter weateher you contributed to the break up or not she obviously had another guy in the wings and this is not what she should have been doing if she clearly did not want to be with you then she should have left before finding another. Some people \just cannot handle being alone.

Id let this one go and tell yourself thank god this happened because if she can find another while she is with you she is not worth it...

[Celest]

DON'T do it.
I ' ve read all your questions you' ve posted and I think that you just want her back.
You're telling that you are missing her .
That's the only reason you want to say your sorry to see what her reation might be. Go on with your life without her, by now she already has somebody ese.

[s_cianci]

The letter sounds adequate. Send it to her and leave it at that.

[huno]

Um... either some of you don't read all the posts in a thread, or you are unfamiliar with the concept of past tense...

I sent the letter

Anyway, I think the letter won't do much... and even if it did, do you really want to get back with a girl who dumped you for some 40-year-old pervert who knocked her up? She's clearly got issues if she left you for a guy that old...

She was your first, but definitely won't be your last. Move on.

[LivingtheLifeinFLA]

What I don't understand is that if she truly cared for me why didn't she stay single after she broke up with me? I pray that there is a true girl out there for me.

Random:

I want you to listen to me very carefully. You are young and what you like today will be much different when you are older. Life is short, she was someone you will never forget, but like a wrecked Porsche, you need to get a new one.

Based on my experience, when a younger woman shacks up with a very older man, she is trying to replace her Dad. Either he was missing, or abusive or whatever. This is why she didn't stay single after the breakup.

Your age is the age to have fun. I GUARANTEE you that you will find the feelings that you had for her again, but she is now the wrecked car (Baggage.. kid and a father you cannot get rid of). DO NOT try to save her, you are not the white knight.

The best way to get over the past is to be with someone new. You learned from your mistakes, but soon you will realize that it was not your fault. Remember that, it was not your fault.

Now, start getting out and meet a new woman. I know that you can do it!

I was your age once and went through the same thing. The same things happen over and over with women until you learn to read them. Keep reading this forum and you will be much more successful in your future endeavors. Best of Luck!:)

[randomguy19]

Hello guys.. I'm the poster about sending the apology to my ex. Well here is the new situation. We started talking and became friends because of it. We even hung out after a year and 1/2 of not seeing each other. When she dropped me off she told me online how she cried on her way home. She also said that she misses the way things were. Since I sent the letter she has really been coming on to me. She even asked questions about my penis. Is that very moral? I have feelings for her still and she has feelings for me. She left me a year and a half ago and moved on to a 40 year old man. She was only 17 at the time. Now she is 19. She may of even cheated on me. I don't know the truth. She told me how she thinks her boyfriend may be unfaithful to her. Yet she is going behind his back to see me. It seems simple but it's not. She has a baby by him and she says that she loves him. She told me if they beak up that we could retry a relationship. I'm so happy to talk to her and it feels so good getting emails from her. There are signs that I'm seeing though. That is telling me to run, to not go back. Despite these signs I still love her and have feelings for her. My best friend blocked me because I'm talking to her. What do you guys think I should do? I LOVE talking to her, but it's hard on the heart. I tried moving on but I can't.

[talaniman]

She told me if they break up that we could retry a relationship.

She knows how you feel so she is filing you with nonsense to keep you around so she has a friend and safety net.

That is telling me to run, to not go back.

That's common sense talking dude, listen to it.

She may of even cheated on me. I don't know the truth.

Yes you do. Your in denial, she is a cheater

I LOVE talking to her, but it's hard on the heart. I tried moving on but I can't.

After a year and a half, you should have been gone, and that letter which you should not have sent, has brought her back to give you misery and confusion. She didn't do this, you did. So do what you have to to get out of this no-win situation, and as far from her as you can get, or this will get worse.

[mckenzie134]

Good one champ. I would normally advise definitely move on there are much better girls than this. You will realise this wheyou find one. I was in similar situation to yours 4 years ago. She didn't havea babythough with the guy. I didn't take her bck and I am pleased thati didn't because I learnt after thatwhen I was with another ghirl that what I felt for her was not love just a bit of neediness and I was with her 3years.

I know how you are feeling ow your heart was broken and you probably had so many things going through your head for many months, slowly with time you have got better but inotice even after 1 1/2years you still have some feelings.I bet started to feel likey ou were over her a bit but not completely but now once again you see a glimer of hope and you are buzzing again. Talking about your penis well yesshe must have some interest but again my last ex did this for a month to me she would ring up and talk dirty on the phone whilewe were on a break this lasted for a whileand till she was over me. Your ex may be doing similar she will talk about things like this to try and get you excited, its hardto say which way she is looking at it like she just still wats to know that you are around this could be a reason why she does thnat or then she may genuinely want to give it another go...

You come on here asking for advice, realyi know you are not going to take any advice if someone says let her go and move on. So you have said what should I do. Ell you should have long ago moved on.

I think you do not needto ask what I should do you should be more asking how should I go about this. Because we all know if given the opportunity you will go back with her. I know what andhow you are feeling and you are definitely not going to move on ifshe wants a relationship. What you need to work out is how you arebest goingto handlethe relationship if it begins again. Workout whatmay have been wrong last time and wereyou to needy baby you should get more interests and so on. Then again mate ican only say one thing shedid this to you once so there may only be more heartreak on thego. But I know one thing your willing to take the chance like many others... GOOD LUCK

[Dennis777]

Hello.

You know deep inside that it can't ever work between you. If you didn't know that you would never be asking this question.

Im not going to say anything about how your helping her cheat on her Man by being with her behind his back.

Im not going to say a word about the fact she is cheating on him and she will cheat on you.

Im not going to talk about how you deserve a better life then waiting for her to maybe split up with her 40 year old guy.

What I will say is STOP now that you have seen that she can't be trusted. Find your Mrs. Right...

Good Luck
Dennis777

[Inspired]

Follow your gut instinct.. Your gut is telling you that there are "red flags". Don't walk away from her, RUN! It does not matter if she's dating a 40 year old guy. What does matter is that she has not learned from her mistakes. She cheated on you and now she's possibly thinking of cheating on him (emotionally she's already cheating by asking you about your penis and sweet talking you).. What makes you think she won't hurt/cheat on you again when its obvious she hasn't changed since you dated her?