[Stanghi02]

Cool I'm looking forward to having a great life without her.

[BlackVY]

Cool I'm looking forward to having a great life without her.

Don't forget that you said that... and that you want to start a new life without her. You need to remember this.

The reason why is what will happen when she comes back from Florida and contacts you, asking you for money or something. What will you do? Will you go running back to her?

What will you do if she contacts you and tells you she is sorry and she will try to change? Will you give her another chance? Or will you keep the NC rule and not respond to her?

I know its hard to be strong, but it could hurt a lot more to give in when she comes callings, so remember what you said in the above quote... :)

[Stanghi02]

I didn't think about that. I will try to be strong an read somemore helpful info from this site. If she calls or text an I'm all alone doing nothing. Give me some advice if you were in that situation and she calls or text?

What should I say if her mom call me? She always tell me how I'm a great guy she even tell her daughter that she is really blessed to have a guy like me. Her mom 60 year old and single. She told her she wish she had a guy that was as great as I was. I don't know why she treated me so bad I been nothing but good to her.

[Stanghi02]

Lastnite I didn't get any sleep, thinking about her all night. Please someone tell me if I'm doing the right thing (NC). I know she's not right for me but I'm getting so weak. I'm so sad and lonely Im always wondering if she miss me at all.

Help me please any advice or encouraging words

[allonmyown]

You are doing the right thing. Breakup sucks, it will take time to get over it. It'll get easier if you keep the NC and do not break NC because it will set you back. I am currently doing NC and it has been 5 months. Keep it up u're doing great.

[talaniman]

You will have low moments, whether you have a girlfriend or not, so stay NC until you can handle the low moments.

[Stanghi02]

Should I at least send a text to see if she had a safe flight today??

[friend4u178]

Should I at least send a text to see if she had a safe flight today???

Nooooooo

That's not No Contact :rolleyes:


If you do , and get no response you'll just feel like cr*p waiting for it , if you do get a response you'll fall straight back into false hope and read positives where there aren't any.

Be honest with yourself and ask why are you wanting to do so , it's to get a bite out of her and cling on to any semblence of hope you have , right.

[Homegirl 50]

She sounds like a piece of work but your problem is you and your lack of self esteem. She has done what you have allowed her to do. You're not happy and you're broke and you're asking if you should move on. What do you think?

You sound like a very nice guy and I'm sure there is a young lady out there who would be thrilled to have you. You don't have to buy love and be abused just to have a woman give you a second of attention.
Leave this woman alone and discover what you like to do, have some fun, make yourself happy and when you do, when you begin to appreciate and love yourself, you will no longer allow someone to treat you with such disrespect.
I wish you well.

[Stanghi02]

I didn't text her... Im so thankful I asked the question before I trired to contact her. Thanks everybody for being there for me I truly needed that.

[Homegirl 50]

You are going to be fine.
Don't give her the satisfaction of returning her texts or phone calls or anything.
You deserve better.

[Stanghi02]

Update her mom called me lastnite and told me I was a really great guy I deserve so much better then her daughter. That's coming from her mom but her mom is the sweetest person. I don't want to NC her mom she's always cared and been there for me.

What should I do or say to her mom?
Her mom ask me if I could meet her for lunch tomorrow.
Thanks everyone. I need some advice.

[Homegirl 50]

Meet her mom for lunch. I hope is does not try and talk you into staying with this girl.

[Stanghi02]

Hey I met up with her mom for lunch an she pretty much told me that I was a good man. Also told me her daughter was immature an I should demand to be treated with respect. I'm trying to move on but its hard. Thanks for the support everyone

[Homegirl 50]

What you should do is to leave her alone.

[Stanghi02]

Threads merged


My girlfriend said she loves me but our relationship is lacking an emotional connection. I'm very affectionate I'm always there when she needs me.

It's hurtful to hear my girlfriend say that. I don't get it cause I haven't really change but she's wants our relationship to be the way it was about a year ago. We haven't been physical in a while because of the lack of emotions.

I also notice when I'm not as nice and sweet she kind of shows me more affection. We spend a lot of time together but lately I've given her more space an I hang out with my friends more. It's driving me crazy and now Im not sure but I don't want to cheat.

My question is: am I going about this the right way by not spending much time with her cause it seem like I get much more affection even though I don't like this? 

My other question: what can I do to get a better emotional connection and make her really want me more?

[redhed35]

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...-473206-2.html

Is this the same girlfriend?

If it is then I can only mirror the advice in the other thread.

This relationship is on the road to no where,I think your both too immature for a serious relationship and probably would be better parting.

Your not sure you don't want to cheat, she's hot and cold,and you want her then don't want her,then not sure... it must be exhausting.

[talaniman]

Whoa dude, you mean you got back together? How about filling us!! Tell us what you had to fix?

Off hand, I would say nothing was fixed, you just wanted to get back together. Reread your other post guy, you can't please her at all because the emotional connection is lacking on her part, and no matter what you do as far as spending time, and the rest of your tactics, will mean nothing because she ain't feeling it.

Are you officially back together? Or "working on it"?

My question is: am I going about this the right way by not spending much time with her cause it seem like I get much more affection even though I don't like this?

Its always good to have other things to do in your life that you enjoy, to keep your life balanced and give a partner some breathing room to enjoy themselves without you. Easier to appreciate and miss a person that way and you won't be taken for granted.

My other question: what can I do to get a better emotional connection and make her really want me more?

You can't!! That's something that a partner has to realize on their own, without your influence, and you have NO CONTROL over the feelings of another, NONE!!

If they can't love you for who you are, then they likely never did, or will!!

[positiveparent]

In my experience you don't go past the "in love" stage you're either in it or you're not, and you never go past it, because in saying that then you aren't in love and possibly never have been, unless its like 20 years down the line, then its possible you or a person may feel they have fallen out of love.

I agree with what others have advised you to do, cut your losses and move on, if your girl feels no connection then there is no connect, you can't make a person love you or want you, no matter how well you treat them, if its not there, then its not there.

Don't waste your time trying to find ways to get her to want you.

Forget it go live your own life and one day you'll meet a girl who has got that feeling for you, and you for her, one sided relationships never work.

[Stanghi02]

After I went ( no contact ) she called texted and left voice mails, she say we really needed to talk. One day after about 9 days NC we talked an I told her we could work on it and the things I exspected.

We agreed to try to work on it,it has gotten so much better in most ways. We had a talk yesterday because I was getting affection but nothing physical. I was real upset because I haven't pressured her at all and when we were all kissy huggy I wanted more. After about 30 minutes we had a talk and she say she love me but we've just gotten back together and the emotional connection wasn't like it use to be about a year ago.

I thought I would share this with y'all to get some help or great advice
And thanks for everything.

This morning she called me to come over we talked some more and she was telling me how thankful and sorry she was again for the way she had been treating me in the past. I haven't given her any money.
One more thing I've met a new girl that real sweet an kind I told her my situation and she's cool we've hung out a few times but I still love my old girl.
Any advice?