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TNstepmom2 · Nov 3, 2007, 08:39 AM

My step-children's mother took them out of state during my husband's scheduled visitation time for the weekend. She didn't notify us until she had left with the kids and even then she did not ask that the time be forfeited or changed, but told us through a message left by her husband on our answering machine (merely two hours before we were to pick up the kids) that the kids would not be with us for the weekend and that we could have them another time that they (the ex wife and current husband) would determine. This is my husband's reoccurring visitation time that is outlined in the Parenting Plan (State of TN). Is there anything that can be done legally about this matter? She is notorious for pulling "quick ones" to suit her needs, but this is the first time she has taken the children out of state without our consent during our visitation time. She is the custodial parent, but when do the noncustodial parent's right get to be protected? Please help us with this ongoing mess! Our children need stability and the System is not offering much relief.

N0help4u · Nov 3, 2007, 08:41 AM

Since they are the custodial parents I think the only thing you can do is report it to family court and your workers ASAP.

macksmom · Nov 3, 2007, 09:55 AM

The noncustodial parents rights are protected... but it's a matter of you doing something about it. If the mother knows she can do these things and you guys never take action, she will continue to do it.

She is in contempt of a court order if she is not notifying the fathers in advance (more than 2 hours) that visitation needs to change for that weekend. The fathers needs to take her back to court.

s_cianci · Nov 3, 2007, 10:01 AM

If the visitation order is court-ordered then she is in contempt and he should take her to court and ask that she be found in contempt and given whatever sanctions are prescribed by law. If it isn't then he should go to court and get it formally ordered. He should also seek to have a provision included that the kids not be taken out of state without his permission.

cjonline · Nov 3, 2007, 03:23 PM

If it is a thing that happens often then the judge can change the custody. The NCP can become the CP. It might be worth mentioning to her before you take her to court. Don't start the conversation in a mean way or as a threat but ask her to respect the time you/your husband have with the kids. Judges are unpredictable, anything can happen in court once facts come out.

tawnynkids · Nov 4, 2007, 10:17 AM

If this is the first time and she has a good reason such as a family emergency, someone was suddenly on their death bed with little to no notice to even her then she won't likely suffer any real penalty for it. If there are little scheduling changes that happen a lot for good reason, such as a conflict in a work schedule then she again won't likely suffer anything. My reason for pointing this out is if she has "good reasons" then bringing it to court will only make you look unreasonable and inflexible with regard to co-parenting and could be viewed as a waste of the courts time.

But if there are on going little changes and problems with the current schedule then revisiting the visitation schedule would be in order anyway. If these are all being done just on her whim then she could very well be found in contempt and a change in the current order to either the custody itself or visitation might be in order.

Find out what her "reason" was for this and consult a lawyer to get the best case presented in court for you.

Handyman2007 · Apr 11, 2012, 09:43 AM

Yes, she overstepped her bounds. Firstly, she must get permission to remove the children from the state. If not from you, she needs to file a petition with the family court.
She also violated it by not giving you proper notice. File a complaint with the Family Court that did the custody and get a court date. Make HER prove everything. BTW, are there any stipulation in the custody papers about removing the children from the jurisdiction of the court?? Most of them do.

Handyman2007 · Apr 11, 2012, 09:45 AM

Originally Posted by cjonline

If it is a thing that happens often then the judge can change the custody. The NCP can become the CP. It might be worth mentioning to her before you take her to court. Don't start the conversation in a mean way or as a threat but ask her to respect the time you/your husband have with the kids. Judges are unpredictable, anything can happen in court once facts come out.

Not without full notification of both parties. A court cannot issue an order without both parties being made aware of it. Only in cases where one parent or the other cannot be notified through reasonable methods will such an action be taken.