[Vivi607]

My boyfriend asked if he could stay with me for a couple weeks before he found a good apartment near work, and of course I said yes. I still go to school and live with my parents. They didn’t mind him staying at our house, and my mother even told him that he could stay with us as long as he wanted to since he just started making money—therefore he started living in my parents’ house!

He is sweet and polite with my parents, and he loves cooking. HOWEVER, he only paid for a 30 dollar grocery bill once during the past month. Every time we go grocery shopping, he liked to get a lot of snacks and things he liked, but I was always the one paying for them, except that one time he paid 30 dollars and said “it doesn’t feel right to let my girlfriend pay for everything”… 30 out of at least 300 that we spent together though?? P.S. he has his own room in my house and eats with us…

Also, the only time that he asked me if I’d like to meet with his friends and have dinner with them, he wanted me to split the cost….. I was shocked when he asked me to pay for myself after dinner, and I just paid for both of us because I wanted him to feel embarrassed that a girl was more generous than him... Did it work? I don’t know… He paid for a couple meals below 20 dollars, but when I offered to treat him for dinner, He picked a restaurant where I easily spent about 80 dollars. He also tries to drive my car when we go out…

He got me a white gold bracelet for my birthday though… Maybe he thinks that the bracelet covers the utilities of living and eating at my parents’ house for free? His family is wealthier than mine, and he has a well-paid job. He gives his mother 1000 dollars every month, and he just bought himself a luxury watch... My mom thinks that I should talk to him and ask him to chip in or to move out, but I’m afraid to hurt our relationship since we have only been together for several months…. He told me that he loves me, and he wants to pay me back by treating me like a princess... I don't feel it though... What should I do? Should I talk to him?

[Oliver2011]

You have two choices.

Not talk to him and let this fester until it blows up big time.

Or

Communicate with him and set up expectations. You know as a couple sometimes you have to talk about difficult things.

[Homegirl 50]

You need to tell him. You parents should have come to an understanding before they let him stay, but you need to now, otherwise your parents are going to be stressed and so will you.
He should have offered to pay something. He feels no embarrassment about living in your parents house for free, this shows what kind of person he is in my opinion. I would never stay at someone's house like that and not give them money for room and board.

[odinn7]

He's an f'ing bum. If you are planning on making a life with this guy, you are in for a very long and rough road as he is already showing you what he's like and it's not going to get any better.

[Vivi607]

You have two choices.

Not talk to him and let this fester until it blows up big time.

Or

Communicate with him and set up expectations. You know as a couple sometimes you have to talk about difficult things.

Thank you! I will talk to him tonight:)

[Vivi607]

He's an f'ing bum. If you are planning on making a life with this guy, you are in for a very long and rough road as he is already showing you what he's like and it's not going to get any better.

Thanks! I think I will have to move on if he doesn't improve :(

[Vivi607]

You need to tell him. You parents should have come to an understanding before they let him stay, but you need to now, otherwise your parents are going to be stressed and so will you.
He should have offered to pay something. He feels no embarrassment about living in your parents house for free, this shows what kind of person he is in my opinion. I would never stay at someone's house like that and not give them money for room and board.

Thank you for your opinion! He said he would like to pay for basic utilities. Hopefully my parents will be happier with him:)