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sjok17 · Jan 1, 2013, 01:32 AM

Me and my boyfriend have been talking about sex for weeks now. It's getting to the point where we both want it and we both want to experience our first times. Though we are young I feel we're ready. What I'm asking is, will my hymen bleed on him? Do lubed condoms help? What's the most un painful sex position there is for virgins and how do I make myself more relaxed when fingering myself? I've been using 1 finger and I don't use tampons I just stress out about lodging two up there let alone a penis. Please help!

Fr_Chuck · Jan 1, 2013, 01:41 AM

How old are you? If under 16 or so, your body may not even be ready to have sex and it can cause other medical issues.

Next yes most likely it will hurt a lot, seldom does a couple finish, and the girl has to stop because of the pain, which can last some for several days.

If the hymen is not broken already, you will bleed on him, on the sheets or where ever you are at. It can be very messy.

Next no birth control is 100 percent, and condoms are one of the less. Thiey have a 3 to 10 percent chance of failure.
So unless you are ready to be a mommy, take a cold shower and get the hormone back into place and stop talking about sex and go back to playing video games or something.

If you have to, get on birth control pills, and be on them for over a month and also use a condom, while you can still get pregnant, at least the odds are much better.

J_9 · Jan 1, 2013, 01:44 AM

Are you ready to be a mother? That is the #1 question. No form of birth control is 100% effective. Anytime you have sex you risk pregnancy.

sjok17 · Jan 1, 2013, 02:03 AM

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

How old are you? if under 16 or so, your body may not even be ready to have sex and it can cause other medical issues.

Next yes most likely it will hurt a lot, seldom does a couple finish, and the girl has to stop because of the pain, which can last some for several days.

If the hymen is not broken already, you will bleed on him, on the sheets or where ever you are at. it can be very messy.

Next no birth control is 100 percent, and condoms are one of the less. Thiey have a 3 to 10 percent chance of failure.
So unless you are ready to be a mommy, take a cold shower and get the hormone back into place and stop talking about sex and go back to playing video games or something.

If you have to, get on birth control pills, and be on them for over a month and also use a condom, while you can still get pregnant, at least the odds are much better.

16 and my boyfriend is 17. Mentally I'm ready but I have heard so much from it being painful to not painful at all. Would missionary be the most least painful? As so I've heard. & I'm well aware if protection causes. I'm not on birth control but we're taking it slow.

J_9 · Jan 1, 2013, 02:06 AM

Can you afford to have a baby?

sjok17 · Jan 1, 2013, 02:09 AM

Originally Posted by J_9

Can you afford to have a baby?

That irrelevant to what I asked. Though that's none of your business if I can. I'm aware of the conciquences and I've taken care if protection.

Fr_Chuck · Jan 1, 2013, 02:10 AM

Do you and boyfriend had good jobs ? Do you have medical coverage that will cover pregnancy?

There is no position that is not going to hurt.

Fr_Chuck · Jan 1, 2013, 02:11 AM

A condom is not Protection, if that is what you are talking about. While withdrawal ( which is not really a method) is the worst by far, condoms are the second worst methods.
Do you birth control you are already taking ? Have you discussed with your parents where the baby will sleep "

J_9 · Jan 1, 2013, 02:19 AM

Let me put it to you this way. I was married at 19 and on birth control. I used not only the pill but the condom as well. I got pregnant not once, but twice. Then I had cancer and went through chemotherapy. I was told I could never get pregnant again. My youngest son is now almost 11.

What business is it of mine? I'll tell you. I will be the one paying your medical bills. The medical bills of your child.

sjok17 · Jan 1, 2013, 02:22 AM

I respect where your coming from trust me. I hate the fact that people like you would have to pay for MY child because it was MY choice to make a stupid decision like this. That's exactly why I'm asking for help.

J_9 · Jan 1, 2013, 02:26 AM

There are many health risks associated with being pregnant at your age. Some temporary, some permanent. Would it help if I outlined those for you?

Not only am I a mother, but I am also an obstetric nurse.

sjok17 · Jan 1, 2013, 02:31 AM

It would help me out a lot. I know you're going to disagree but this is something I'm very uncomfortable talking to my parents about but I don't want to have sex yet because I haven't educated myself enough. Though I want to, I'm scared of the risks and you can't find many answers online because who knows what's true and what's not true.

J_9 · Jan 1, 2013, 02:37 AM

At your age your body is not yet done growing. If you get pregnant your body doesn't know whether to grow you or the baby. You risk having a baby with downs syndrome, mental retardation, premature labor and delivery.

You also risk getting Gestational Diabetes. That means that you could get diabetes during pregnancy that could last after you deliver. Meaning you would have to give yourself shots in the stomach several times a day for the rest of your life.

Also, you could get PIH (Pregnancy Induced Hypertension), high blood pressure that could lead to seizures. Do you want to have seizures for the rest of your life for a few minutes of fun?

sjok17 · Jan 1, 2013, 02:40 AM

Lol that wasn't exactly my life plan. But I just want to know, what's the safest way to be I guess you'd say "sexual" with him. We're both virgins to diseases are slim. Besides that I greatly appreciate that information!

ScottGem · Jan 1, 2013, 07:01 AM

Originally Posted by sjok17

I respect where your coming from trust me. I hate the fact that people like you would have to pay for MY child because it was MY choice to make a stupid decision like this. that's exactly why I'm asking for help.

And we are giving you help. Bottom line is NO ONE should engage in sexual intercourse until they are financially, emotionally and physically prepared for having a child. You may think you are emotionally ready, but I doubt it. You definitely aren't financially or physically ready.

Originally Posted by sjok17

lol that wasn't exactly my life plan. but I just want to know, what's the safest way to be I guess you'd say "sexual" with him. we're both virgins to diseases are slim. besides that I greatly appreciate that information!

The safest way is to stay away from intercourse. Intimacy does not have to include intercourse.