[Jennie22]

My fiancé and I been together going on six years and once in awhile we would use condoms but now he doesn't want to wear them at all. Even though we use the pull out method I was wondering if he secretly wants to get me pregnant?? We both want a baby but we also both agree that now is not the time. Can someone give me their opinion/intake on this, ty :)

He is 37 & I'm 23.

[teacherjenn4]

If you don't want a baby, what birth control method are you using?

[talaniman]

If this is the only form of birth control you are using sometimes, then its foolish to think you can wait for the right time. I think the thing to do is talk about it, and not presume or assume what he is thinking.

Seems another form of birth control would be wise until all the facts are in the open, or a marriage has taken place. Or it's the right time.

[Cat1864]

My fiancé and I been together going on six years and once in awhile we would use condoms but now he doesn't want to wear them at all. Even though we use the pull out method I was wondering if he secretly wants to get me pregnant?? We both want a baby but we also both agree that now is not the time. Can someone give me their opinion/intake on this, ty

He is 37 & I'm 23.

Jennie, I am confused because in a previous thread you were wanting to become pregnant. Has something changed?

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/pregna...ms-680759.html

Jennie22
Jul 17, 2012, 06:44 PM

Thanks for your help. Ill take the good luck cause I do want a baby.

If circumstances have changed since July, then you need to sit down with your fiancé and discuss the issue. If now is not a good time for you to add a baby to your family, then you need to use better birth control than the 'pull-out' method (Some say it is effective, but like all forms it has to be used correctly which means knowing when you are fertile and abstaining on those days. Personally, Ihave heard of too many women getting pregnant 'by accident' using this method.) If he won't use condoms, then either you don't have sex or you change to a method you have full control over such as pills.

Talk with him and good luck.

[Jennie22]

If you don't want a baby, what birth control method are you using?

I don't use any birth control.

Jennie, I am confused because in a previous thread you were wanting to become pregnant. Has something changed?

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/pregna...ms-680759.html



If circumstances have changed since July, then you need to sit down with your fiancé and discuss the issue. If now is not a good time for you to add a baby to your family, then you need to use better birth control than the 'pull-out' method (Some say it is effective, but like all forms it has to be used correctly which means knowing when you are fertile and abstaining on those days. Personally, Ihave heard of too many women getting pregnant 'by accident' using this method.) If he won't use condoms, then either you don't have sex or you change to a method you have full control over such as pills.

Talk with him and good luck.

Yes that was because we thought I was pregnant at that time but wasn't, I think we both us the excuse of "IT'S NOT THE RIGHT TIME" because we have been through this about twice and it is a dissapointment to the both of us to find out that I wasn't pregnant. I guess I was just wondering if he wants to surprise me with I pregnancy <----this might sound a little weird, but I wanted to know is it a guy thing to not use condoms, maybe it feels better or because is exclusive.

Thnks for you adivice everyone :)

[Cat1864]

yes that was because we thought i was pregnant at that time but wasn't, i think we both us the excuse of "IT'S NOT THE RIGHT TIME" because we have been through this about twice and it is a dissapointment to the both of us to find out that i wasn't pregnant. i guess i was just wondering if he wants to surprise me with i pregnacy <----this might sound a little weird, but i wanted to know is it a guy thing to not use condoms, maybe it feels better or because is exclusive.

If you are actively trying to get pregnant, then why use condoms or the pull-out method? Why not just have sex? I highly suggest talking with him. Make a decision one way or the other and take the appropriate steps. Either you prepare for a child or you start using better birth control. Surprise pregnancies are not recommended. Plus even actively trying can take months or years for healthy couples with no medical issues.

You would have to ask him why he doesn't like using condoms. We can give you the common answers, but he may have completely different reasons.

Some common reasons:
-It feels better.
-Condoms are too tight.
-Irritation from the materials used in manufacturing condoms.
-Dislike stopping 'play' long enough to put one on.

Some men prefer wearing them because they can help desensitize and the male can last longer.

Talk with your boyfriend and be honest with each other. If at some point you do marry and/or have children, you will need to be able to discuss sensitive topics without getting upset or defensive.

Good luck.

[Jennie22]

If you are actively trying to get pregnant, then why use condoms or the pull-out method? Why not just have sex? I highly suggest talking with him. Make a decision one way or the other and take the appropriate steps. Either you prepare for a child or you start using better birth control. Surprise pregnancies are not recommended. Plus even actively trying can take months or years for healthy couples with no medical issues.

You would have to ask him why he doesn't like using condoms. We can give you the common answers, but he may have completely different reasons.

Some common reasons:
-It feels better.
-Condoms are too tight.
-Irritation from the materials used in manufacturing condoms.
-Dislike stopping 'play' long enough to put one on.

Some men prefer wearing them because they can help desensitize and the male can last longer.

Talk with your boyfriend and be honest with each other. If at some point you do marry and/or have children, you will need to be able to discuss sensitive topics without getting upset or defensive.

Good luck.

Thank you for the advice, very much appreciated :)