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xzylxzyl · Sep 23, 2012, 07:21 PM

Originally Posted by john82

i do have a good life loving family friends work everything just fine just that she is not around

You need to help us here. What is it that you are feeling so strongly for a woman you have never been in a relationship with? Why is it you cannot see possibilities in other women? Why do you want her around when it's clear she doesn't want you? Why are you satisfied with having a pretend relationship in your head? When you realize that the love you feel for this girl is only in a relationship you are having with her IN YOUR MIND, you can begin to come back to reality. What you are feeling is not real. It's just like Monopoly money... it works in the game Monopoly (your mind) but Monopoly money doesn't really buy you a hotel on Park Avenue (reality).

john82 · Sep 23, 2012, 07:34 PM

Originally Posted by xzylxzyl

You need to help us here. What is it that you are feeling so strongly for a woman you have never been in a relationship with? Why is it you cannot see possibilities in other women? Why do you want her around when it's clear she doesn't want you? Why are you satisfied with having a pretend relationship in your head? When you realize that the love you feel for this girl is only in a relationship you are having with her IN YOUR MIND, you can begin to come back to reality. What you are feeling is not real. It's just like Monopoly money...it works in the game Monopoly (your mind) but Monopoly money doesn't really buy you a hotel on Park Avenue (reality).

So I'm suppose to move on and hope things work out I am a bit scared I always hoped things would workout between us

xzylxzyl · Sep 23, 2012, 07:40 PM

Originally Posted by john82

so im suppose to move on and hope things work out i am a bit scared i always hoped things would workout between us

Yes, you move on and hope things will work out for you BECAUSE they are not working out in what you want from this girl. This fantasy of yours is hopeless, so why would you not want to move on? Why would you stay in a place where there is no hope it will work out? At least moving on gives you a chance to find love in your life. And by the way, things WILL work out for you if you give others a chance to get to know you.

xzylxzyl · Sep 23, 2012, 08:03 PM

Please tell us how you are feeling now. Is anything that has been said by us helped you in any way? Or at least have you thinking that maybe you should try to make a change?

john82 · Sep 23, 2012, 09:38 PM

U all r really nice people trying to move on is a big decision hard one
Mostly everything around me I could relate with her and I am not sure about it too

xzylxzyl · Sep 23, 2012, 10:29 PM

Originally Posted by john82

u all r really nice people trying to move on is a big decision hard one
mostly everything around me i could relate with her and iam not sure about it too

OK, I wish you luck and I'm sure everyone else who answered wishes you well. At least you have some insight from other people. I will say this one last thing. Right now a relationship with this girl or any other girl for that matter is the least of your problems. You need time to work on yourself. You may not realize this, but your hunger and neediness for this girl is probably what drove her off in the first place. Women want men who are not needy or clingy. They want men who are confident and sure of themselves. You do not exhibit any of these qualities. It is possible that you may need help beyond what we can give you here. You are so young to think so old. Seek counseling and in the meantime, just try to take teacherjenn4's advice about helping others. It may help lead you to the beautiful person you could be.