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    daniella4087's Avatar
    daniella4087 Posts: 55, Reputation: 0
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    #1

    Jul 23, 2008, 05:40 PM
    Child hitting
    Hi my daughter is 16 months and she's been hitting a lot she will hit me if I tell her no or take something away from her that she shouldn't have I have never hit her I know her father hasn't because I'm always there and I just want to know is it something that kids just do at this age or does she have to see it somewhere?
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #2

    Jul 23, 2008, 05:54 PM
    It's common. She's acting out, she's not getting what she wants and hitting, to her, is the only option.

    Have you tried giving her a time out, or taking away a favorite toy. Just because it's common, doesn't mean it's acceptable, it's time to put a stop to this behavior before it gets out of hand.

    Now remember the rule of thumb for time out's, 1 minute for every year of the child age. Two minute time out would not be inappropriate for your child. Put her in a spot like a chair in the kitchen, tell her she's in time out, hit the timer on your microwave for 2 minutes. When the time is done, ask her if she knows why she had a time out, if she doesn't, then tell her. Time out is usually done after at least one warning to stop the behavior.

    Good luck.
    daniella4087's Avatar
    daniella4087 Posts: 55, Reputation: 0
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    #3

    Jul 23, 2008, 08:59 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Altenweg
    It's common. She's acting out, she's not getting what she wants and hitting, to her, is the only option.

    Have you tried giving her a time out, or taking away a favorite toy. Just because it's common, doesn't mean it's acceptable, it's time to put a stop to this behavior before it gets out of hand.

    Now remember the rule of thumb for time out's, 1 minute for every year of the child age. Two minute time out would not be inappropriate for your child. Put her in a spot like a chair in the kitchen, tell her she's in time out, hit the timer on your microwave for 2 minutes. When the time is done, ask her if she knows why she had a time out, if she doesn't, then tell her. Time out is usually done after at least one warning to stop the behavior.

    Good luck.

    Yeah the only problem with that is she doesn't talk much... I thought about the time out thing but I figured she wouldn't understand yet I tell her not to hit but then she hits me or telling her not to hit... and I don't want to pop her on the but or anything yet because she's not going to understand that just yet but that's my last resort... and if I take a toy away she won't get that either... so I guess I will just keep telling her no until she can talk and understand what I'm saying... but thank you
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #4

    Jul 23, 2008, 09:04 PM
    Trust me, she doesn't have to talk to be able to understand. I'm sure she understands way more than you know. The time out will work, just talk in simple sentences when you send her for her time out.

    Example: "No hitting, hitting is bad, if you hit, you get time out."

    If she hits again then put her in time out, tell her in simple terms why she's there. "You hit, hitting is not okay, so you are having a time out."

    When she's done her time out then ask her to say sorry and then give her a hug.

    Always go down to her level when you are talking to her, or punishing her.

    My son was 1 when he started biting, we did time outs and they worked. He didn't talk until he was almost 3.

    Good luck.
    simoneaugie's Avatar
    simoneaugie Posts: 2,490, Reputation: 438
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    #5

    Jul 23, 2008, 09:07 PM
    Children understand simple commands, like "no" long before they can express themselves. She likely can understand much of what you are saying to her. Keep it simple. She'll learn to tell you "no" if she doesn't already.
    daniella4087's Avatar
    daniella4087 Posts: 55, Reputation: 0
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    #6

    Jul 23, 2008, 10:06 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Altenweg
    Trust me, she doesn't have to talk to be able to understand. I'm sure she understands way more than you know. The time out will work, just talk in simple sentences when you send her for her time out.

    Example: "No hitting, hitting is bad, if you hit, you get time out."

    If she hits again then put her in time out, tell her in simple terms why she's there. "You hit, hitting is not okay, so you are having a time out."

    When she's done her time out then ask her to say sorry and then give her a hug.

    Always go down to her level when you are talking to her, or punishing her.

    My son was 1 when he started biting, we did time outs and they worked. He didn't talk until he was almost 3.

    Good luck.



    Oh really I would have never thought that I will try that tomorrow beacause I'm sure she going to hit... but I'm not to sure if she's going to stay in the corner... how do I do that?
    simoneaugie's Avatar
    simoneaugie Posts: 2,490, Reputation: 438
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    #7

    Jul 23, 2008, 10:15 PM
    Repetitive motion. Keep putting her back into the corner until the two minutes is up. Better to just gently lead her back and give her a stern look than talk about it. Don't get mad and don't give in. You are the one in charge. You get to make and enforce the rules.
    daniella4087's Avatar
    daniella4087 Posts: 55, Reputation: 0
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    #8

    Jul 23, 2008, 11:06 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by simoneaugie
    Repetitive motion. Keep putting her back into the corner until the two minutes is up. Better to just gently lead her back and give her a stern look than talk about it. Don't get mad and don't give in. You are the one in charge. You get to make and enforce the rules.


    OK thank you I will try that.. I hope it works! :D
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #9

    Jul 24, 2008, 05:51 PM
    Just remember to be consistent, don't give up, if she hits then it's time out, no matter where you are, even in a store. If you aren't consistent then it won't work.

    Let us know how it goes. :)
    daniella4087's Avatar
    daniella4087 Posts: 55, Reputation: 0
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    #10

    Jul 24, 2008, 09:09 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Altenweg
    Just remember to be consistent, don't give up, if she hits then it's time out, no matter where you are, even in a store. If you aren't consistent then it won't work.

    Let us know how it goes. :)


    OK I will def let you know... but just in case that doesn't work are there any other suggestions for me:o
    Taylor Dncan's Avatar
    Taylor Dncan Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #11

    Jun 28, 2012, 10:12 AM
    I think that there must b similar behaviors as such that she is being exposed to. Because @ 16 months they are only doing what they see or know. God bless
    Mobley119's Avatar
    Mobley119 Posts: 142, Reputation: 6
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    #12

    Jul 4, 2012, 11:40 PM
    A good place for a time out at this age is a high chair. That way they literally can't leave. Good luck!
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #13

    Jul 4, 2012, 11:43 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Mobley119 View Post
    A good place for a time out at this age is a high chair. That way they literally can't leave. Good luck!
    I don't agree with this.

    Putting a child for a time out in her high chair is making the high chair a negative place. Yes, she can't leave, but that's not really the point of a time out. Getting her to accept the time out and stay put for it, is part of the lesson.

    Putting a child in a high chair for a punishment is the same as putting a dog in a kennel for a punishment. It's not good parenting.
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #14

    Jul 4, 2012, 11:58 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Mobley119 View Post
    A good place for a time out at this age is a high chair. That way they literally can't leave. Good luck!
    Very bad advice! When this is done a child relates eating to punishment.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #15

    Jul 5, 2012, 08:05 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Mobley119 View Post
    A good place for a time out at this age is a high chair. That way they literally can't leave. Good luck!
    Bad advice -
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