[amberpock]

I am a 15 year old female. I am sexually active with my boyfriend, we are safe and responsible so please don't comment on this.

I have tried to masturbate many times before using a variety of methods. Me and my boyfriend have engaged in oral sex and we have tried many different positions during intercourse.

Bascially, I can't feel any pleasure at all from anything. I have never suffered from any sexual trauma and I seem to be fine downstairs so I don't know what could be wrong.

Thank you for any answers!

[ScottGem]

Sorry, but you can't tell us what we can or cannot comment on.

But first, the problem here may be ignorance of the right way to stimulate you. Or it could be some physical defect on your part. If it's the latter you need to discuss it with your doctor. And of course you probably can't do that. If it is ignorance, well we cannot condone illegal activities. And since 15 is under the age of consent in most places, we cannot advise you how or even how to learn.

What we CAN advise you is that no form of birth control is 100% effective. And the phrase "safe and responsible" when it comes to underage sex is an oxymoron. No one should be engaging in sexual intercourse until they are prepared to have a child.

[amberpock]

Of course I can't, you can say what you wish. I just ask that you don't. I feel as if I am ready for a sexual relationship and I take responsibility in doing so.

I have tried many different ways, do you have any other suggestions? I have decided not to consult a doctor as of yet. I will wait until I am of age.

[ScottGem]

. I feel as if I am ready for a sexual relationship .

Of course you do, but legally you cannot consent to having sex. And it is a rare 15 old who is truly ready for the emotional complications of a sexual relationship. And it is an even rarer 15 year old who is prepared to be a mother at 15.

.and I take responsibility in doing so. .

The problem with this is you have NO concept of what you are taking on as much as you may think you do.

[jenniepepsi]

I would suggest talking to your gynecologist. He would be better able to exam you, and see if there is any problems. Hormonal imbalance causing this is actually a pretty common issue in teen girls who are not old enough to be having sex.

[amberpock]

I don't think its your place to dictate to me what I should and shouldn't do thank you very much.

On the other hand, I will thank you. I didn't expect anything when I first started to have sex but a number of sources led me to believe girls as young as six could feel sexual pleasure, so I began to think there was an issue.

[jenniepepsi]

Um. I didn't dictate a damn thing.

If you choose not to go to your doctor, so be it. Its no skin off my back.

Go to the doctor, don't go to the doctor. You are not my kid. And quite honestly I'm getting tired of caring about all you the ignorant and self absorbed teenagers behaviors on this site.

[ScottGem]

I don't think its your place to dictate to me what I should and shouldn't do thank you very much.

I'm not dictating, I'm advising. I don't know where you are or what your situation is so I can't dictate anything. However, you chose to post a question here. Our policy is to try to help anyone who posts a question. Part of that is answering the posted question when we can. Sometimes we can't. As I mentioned in your case, it could be illegal. But another part is to advise people about the situation they find themselves in. When we see someone engaging in risky behavior that can have consequences they either can't or won't see, then we try to help bu offering advice to help them see.

On the other hand, I will thank you. I didn't expect anything when I first started to have sex but a number of sources led me to believe girls as young as six could feel sexual pleasure, so I began to think there was an issue.

Yes, children as young as 6 can feel sexual pleasure and adults way older than you also can't. There could be a medical reason for this. But the only way to know is to discuss it with a doctor.

So the bottom line here is until you can discuss this doctor, you are doing something that you get no pleasure from but can have very serious consequences; pregnancy, STDs, criminal prosecutions, and, at your age a pregnancy represents serious health risks to you. Are these risks worth doing something you get no pleasure from? Heck, are these risks worth doing something you get a momentary pleasure from. I can tell you I evaluated that question when I was your age. And I did the TRULY responsible thing by not taking those risks.

[amberpock]

Jenniepepsi: I didn't mean you at all. Your advice was helpful and I thank you for that.

ScottGem: okay, I'm in the wrong. I'm just tired of people commenting on what I am doing when I've only asked for a straight answer but thank you for your advice nonetheless.

Both of you, I know what I am doing is very serious but I've taken a very mature approch to it and I will deal with the consequences as and when they occur. Once again, thank you!

[amberpock]

Approach*

[jenniepepsi]

My mistake. I did think you were talking to me.

I understand where you are coming from. I became sexually active when I was a teen. And I hope you can trust, that when we give you advice, we DO know what you mean, and how it feels, and what its like. We have all been there. And we see it through eyes that have lived through it and past it. And we only hope to guide you away from the traps that puberty can set for us.

Whether you (and other teens) would like to admit it, you know deep down, that it IS dangerous when you make a choice like this. It DOES have risks, and consequences. And it is VERY important, that you make sure you know about all those risks, and if you still choose to take those chances, at least make sure you protect yourself and your partner.

I hope you feel you can come here when you need advice. Even if its advice you may not want to hear. Even if it sounds like it came from your mother :)

[amberpock]

I agree, there are a lot of risks that I'm aware of. I know I will not catch an STD because my partner and I have never had sexual relations with anyone other than ourselves. I am also on birth control which I take religiously.

Thank you again, and sorry for sounding rude before!

[ScottGem]

Both of you, I know what I am doing is very serious but I've taken a very mature approch to it and I will deal with the consequences as and when they occur. Once again, thank you!

See but this is part of the problem. You only THINK you have "taken a very mature approach". But, in fact, you haven't. A very mature approach would be to forego sexual intercourse until you are physically, emotionally and financially prepared to have a child.

I agree, there are a lot of risks that I'm aware of. I know I will not catch an STD because my partner and I have never had sexual relations with anyone other than ourselves. I am also on birth control which I take religiously.

For example, you are relying on your partners statements that he has not had relations with anyone else. It's probably true, but it may not. And you are clearly relying on whatever birth control you use. But no form of birth control is 100% effective. We have members here who became pregnant while using 3 separate forms of birth control "religiously".

But the fact here is that, despite the risks you chose to take them for the pleasure you thought you would get. That is NOT mature actions. And you clearly don't understand completely the risks you are taking. You say you will deal with the consequences. But you really don't believe those consequences will happen to you. You have no real clue what will happen to your life if you get pregnant. And for what? A few minutes of pleasure which you haven't been able to feel? And you think this is mature?

I doubt if I'm getting through to you. I'm just an adult with old-fashioned ideas. And you are mature beyond your years and know exactly what you are doing. I hope you never have to find out how immature you really are.

[amberpock]

Please don't treat me like an idiot. I only asked for some advice.

[ScottGem]

Please don't treat me like an idiot. I only asked for some advice.

I'm not treating you like an idiot. That just displays more of your immaturity.

[Wondergirl]

I've taken a very mature approch to it

Mature = being over 18 and in a financially secure and emotionally stable relationship usually blessed by marriage vows.

[amberpock]

I feel as if I'm being treated stupidly. Please can you not comment on my situation.

[ScottGem]

I feel as if I'm being treated stupidly. Please can you not comment on my situation.

Of course you feel that way. You made a decision and other are challenging that decision and making a good argument against that decision. So that is making you feel uncomfortable.

But the real truth here is that is that you are making a bad decision, not because your are stupid or an idiot (and I don't for a moment think that way about you) but because you making this decision out of inexperience and out of a disregard for the consequences. So what we are trying to do here is give you advice that may change your mind and make a good decision based on others experience and knowledge.

[amberpock]

As I said before, thank you very much for the concern but I'm not interested. I knew exactly what I was getting into and I stick by my decision.

[Wondergirl]

I feel as if I'm being treated stupidly. Please can you not comment on my situation.

Stupid? no. Shortsighted and wanting immediate pleasure without regard for long-term consequences? Yes.