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    unhappy5's Avatar
    unhappy5 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    May 30, 2011, 02:03 PM
    Will my husband change his mind
    My husband just told me he was leaving me for another woman that he swears he hasn't cheated.We just had our 12 year anniversay with 3 kids 9 , 3 , and 3 months. My question is now he says she is out of the picture and he just wants a divorce. I want to wait for the divorce but he said do it now so I am. But Im afraid of hurting him in the divorce cause I want him to change his mind and come back to us. Will he regret what he has done and come home?
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #2

    May 30, 2011, 02:24 PM

    Who knows, but what he will do, is take advantage of you, living you with a lot less because you are being blinded by "love"

    You get your attorney and get any and everything you could get. If he is going to come back he would either way
    martinizing2's Avatar
    martinizing2 Posts: 1,868, Reputation: 819
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    #3

    May 31, 2011, 02:07 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by unhappy5 View Post
    my husband just told me he was leaving me for another woman that he swears he hasnt cheated.We just had our 12 year anniversay with 3 kids 9 , 3 , and 3 months. my question is now he says she is out of the picture and he just wants a divorce. I want to wait for the divorce but he said do it now so I am. But Im affraid of hurting him in the divorce cause I want him to change his mind and come back to us. Will he regret what he has done and come home??
    A relationship outside of another committed relationship, done without the knowledge of the other is cheating.
    Sex is only one way to cheat but does not have to be involved in order to be guilty of cheating.

    If this does not work out and he wants to come "home" and you take him back , the final and largest regret will be set to take place.
    And it will be you regretting letting him back.

    Once he goes , fails , then you let him return you will have set the pattern for what will take place the rest of your life.

    He'll be sniveling back to you to fill in between conquests.
    Can you live with that?

    And worse , the effect it will have on your children .
    How bad do they feel when dads gone the first time ? It is usually hell for everybody and can leave scars.
    Think about the effect of it happening two or three times on your children.

    And if he leaves knowing the green light is on for his return , I'll wager he will again and again.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #4

    Jun 5, 2011, 03:36 PM

    Why take a chance of him changing his mind? Your job is to protect you, and your children. He would get hurt if he was doing the right thing for his family would he?

    You would be a lousy mother for sacrificing your families well being, on the hopes that a dude who wants out will come back, to save a few bucks, or worse, when things don't work with the chick on the side.

    Give him what he asked for and then do what he doesn't want to do. Be there for his family.
    unhappy5's Avatar
    unhappy5 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Jun 12, 2011, 04:40 PM
    He wants to kiss me but cant
    Me and my husband are going through a divorce.. When we are around he hugs me touches my face and says I want to kiss you but I cant... WHY!
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #6

    Jun 12, 2011, 04:45 PM

    Have you asked him why?
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #7

    Jun 12, 2011, 04:50 PM

    Probably because he's getting ready to divorce you, which means that kissing, sex, all things that people in love do, aren't applicable anymore.

    Why tempt yourself when it's over?
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #8

    Jun 12, 2011, 05:14 PM

    And that may not be a comment, but a question, he may be waiting for you to say go ahead?

    But why if you are getting a divorce are you hugging and getting into a kiss position ?

    If you are not upset and wonder why he is not kissing,
    Perhaps you and he really don't want a divorce, Have you considered putting divorce on hold, and going to counseling and seeing where that leads
    unhappy5's Avatar
    unhappy5 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #9

    Jun 14, 2011, 11:02 AM
    Time with ex
    Im spending the weekend at my inlaws with my soon to be ex husband and our 3 children.. I don't want the divorce and he tells me he don't no what he wants to do.. What can I say or do with him this weekend to remind him what it was like before. Its only been a month since he has been gone..
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #10

    Jun 14, 2011, 02:38 PM

    You can't make some do anything he doesn't want to do. Where in the divorce process are you? Have papers been served?

    You can talk to him - which you appear to be able to do. Other than that... he either loves you and wants to be married to you or he doesn't.

    I just saw your other questions - these should all be combined: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/divorc...d-579103.html; https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/divorc...nt-581555.html
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