[emmza123]

Hi, I'm a girl in high school and there is the guy 3 years older than me and when ever he sees me he always comes up to me and puts his arms around my side and won't let go then immediately he will get a hug off me. But the thing is he is sexually always putting his body against mine and I do it back and he goes far because he's older. He always gives me a hug and when he lets go he touches my breasts and slides his hands slowly down my front. And I don't noe if I like it I guess its OK but not when teachers at school step in and give you a look. So I don't noe how to deal with this. Yes I liked being touched but not all the time help me what should I do ?

[Eileen G]

You have to say to him that you don't like being touched sexually in public and so casually. There is a huge difference between a friendly hug and "sliding his hands slowly down your front."

By the way, what age are you and what age is he?

[emmza123]

He is 17 and I'm 14 yrs old.

[Clough]

Hi, emmza123!

If what he does makes you uncomfortable, tell him that when he starts to do it.

Also, if you're 14 and he's 17, aren't you like two or three grades apart from each other?

Thanks!

[kp2171]

You control your own body.

Yes... attention, even unsolicited, can be interesting and confusing at the same time.

Until you tell him to stop... and make his stop... he will not stop.

Maybe you don't want him to. Maybe you do. Maybe you don't know.

But really... it's a good time for you to take control of your own body... like it or not, there will be people who will push you to whatever limit you let them get to.

So...

Attention is nice. Even addicting a little bit.

But id step up and make him know you aren't that easy. That he can't just lay his hands on you whenever he wants. Because right now... he almost can.

Practice saying no and practive pushing away. You will need these skills. Just the truth.

[emmza123]

Yes I'm 14 and he's 17 clough. Is that bad? And thank you for your help but I think I like when he touches me but I do get scared if he won't stop

[Clough]

In the early teen years, 14 to 17 is a bit of a gap. Do your parents know about what's been going on?

Also, did you read the post by kp2171 above? There's some great information in it that you really ought to take to heart!

Thanks!

[Eileen G]

At 14, three years older is a lot. Also, at 14, I'm pretty sure that any sort of sexual contact by an older boy is semi-illegal.

Everyone likes being touched, but only if it's the right sort of touch. There's a huge difference between a friendly hug and being fondled in public. To me, the fact that he is touching you like this where your teachers can see is disrespectful and even a little insulting.

I think you have to think about what is acceptable to you, and make sure he knows that.

[kp2171]

yes im 14 and hes 17 clough. is that bad? and thank you for your help but i think i like when he touches me but i do get scared if he wont stop

Well... liking his touch is not abnormal.

That he pushes you to the limit isn't abnormal... doesn't make it right. But until you make him stop, he has no incentive to stop.

So...

Please, please, please.

Start now.

Start saying no now. Start pushing away.

You NEED to be able to do this. He won't do it for you. It needs to come from within you.

Trust yourself. Relax. When he takes it too far, know your right to demand he stop.

It is your right. And as nice as it is to have attention... as good as it might be... you are not ready for this to escalate. So stop it here and now.

[emmza123]

Thank you for your answers and it workes I said no that's enough and he backed off thank you so much!!

[Aurora_Bell]

Emmza, I am glad you spoke with I'm, because for a 17 year old to be sliding his hands down a 14 year olds chest, in my opinion is wrong! He is one year away from being an adult and should know better!

Yes you control your body, and if you don't say no, no one else will. This is definitely not acceptable behavior in a public place like a school. I hope he keeps his mitts off!

[Kitkat22]

Emmza, I am glad you spoke with im, because for a 17 year old to be sliding his hands down a 14 year olds chest, in my opinion is wrong! He is one year away from being an adult and should know better!

yes you control your body, and if you don't say no, no one else will. This is definitely not acceptable behavior in a public place like a school. I hope he keeps his mitts off!

Read her other threads Bella.

[Eileen G]

I'm so glad.

[Clough]

thank you for your answers and it workes i sed no thats enough and he backed off thank you so much!!!

Now, that's definitely positive progress!

Thanks!