[endangered.spirit]

I recently posted regarding a predicament to which I received an answer I did not like. I then asked my roommate to create an alias and post his advice he gave me. I wasn't trying to decieve anybody and since the host fr_chuck can see my ip address apparently I know to him it must have looked like I answered my own question under the choklit.munster alias. I am in a painful situation and just wanted some good advice! My roommate had something good to say and I thought others experiencing what I felt should see it as opposed to some other responses I got! People in online forums are notoriously unforgiving and critical. I was hoping for something different here. I will withdraw my profile. Thanks to those of you that did help. And chuck if you are really a christanity expert, your responses could be tempered with a bit of grace and less hostility. That's the kind of judgmental nature that gives christans a bad name. Take care!

[Alty]

Here's the problem. By asking your roommate to post it did indeed look like you created a new account just to answer your own question. Multiple accounts is against the rules on this site, with good reason.

AMHD is a wonderful site, but you have to obey the rules. The rules are what makes this site the wonderful place it is. When a mod sees two usernames under one IP the logical conclusion is that it's the same person, especially when one of the usernames posts on the same thread as the first in order to give advice.

I'm sure that Chuck would accept your apology, if you're indeed sincere. As for the advice, you take the good with the bad, that's the nature of asking for advice, everyone has their own opinion, it's up to you to pick which advice you want to follow and which you'll ignore.

I hope you stick around. AMHD really is a wonderful site.

Good luck.

[Wondergirl]

I recently posted regarding a predicament to which I received an answer I did not like.

When you post a question such as yours, of course you are going to get advice you don't like.

I am in a painful situation and just wanted some good advice!

It looked like you then got "advice" that said what you did was okay. That's "good advice"?

people in online forums are notoriously unforgiving and critical. I was hoping for something different here.

We tell it like it is. Did you really expect everyone to pat you on the back and tell you what you had done was okay?

I will withdraw my profile.

You can't. That is not something a poster can do. All you can do is hope this thread will fall down into the depths of a cyber canyon.

Thanks to those of you that did help.

I read through all the comments. Evryone helped. You may not see it that way right now, but every piece of advice you got had merit to it.

And chuck if you are really a christanity expert, your responses could be tempered with a bit of grace and less hostility. That's the kind of judgmental nature that gives christans a bad name.

He wasn't judgmental. He gave you an honest response. I would have said something similar had I thrown in my two cents.

[Cat1864]

So, you and your wife have a roommate?

We all mess up every now and then. It is how we handle the clean-up that shows our true selves.

You can try to sweep/hide the evidence under the rug. Usually, that ends up with a lump that trips you up when aren't paying attention or someone else asking why the mountain is the living room.

You can be open and honest and accept the mess is yours and do what you can to keep it from staining the relationship. It's hard work even if you don't add more to it before it is fully clean. However, it feels better and is less confusing than trying to cover the mistake up.

Apologies are great places to start on the clean up. Good luck.

[Jake2008]

Wow, it seems that the aftermath of a drunken kiss has caused far more trouble than the kiss itself.

I don't agree it's cheating. A drunken kiss is a drunken kiss, no more no less. It wasn't carried up to the room, nobody took their clothes off, the marriage vows are intact.

You stopped yourself.

I was once out with my husband, and a girlfriend of mine planted a kiss on my husband that nearly took the roof off. Right in front of me. We both eventually laughed it off, and never looked back, but, it was only a stupid kiss.

It is interesting to me that with the divorce rate at nearly, or over 50% (depending upon which statistic you choose to believe), I've yet to read where a sloppy drunken kiss was the cause of a marriage breaking up. Sleeping with somebody else, yes, seeking comfort in the arms of another, yes. But a sloppy kiss?

Keep the kiss to yourself, I think you've learned your lesson.

[Alty]

Hey everyone.

I just want to point out that the OP has been banned.

Just fyi. :)

[Wondergirl]

Hey everyone.

I just want to point out that the OP has been banned.

Just fyi. :)

How do you know? I just checked his profile and don't see any hint of that there.

[Alty]

How do you know? I just checked his profile and don't see any hint of that there.

Look under the username, there's a line, that means he's been banned.

[Wondergirl]

Look under the username, there's a line, that means he's been banned.

But but but there's a line under yours -- and mine too.

[Alty]

but but but there's a line under yours -- and mine too.

No sweetie. Under ours there's Expert, under most there's either uber member, new member, ultra member, etc.

The OP just has a line, that means banned.

[Wondergirl]

There is definitely a line under each person's name, regardless of status.

In the past, once someone had been banned, I could no longer pull up his profile.

[Alty]

Maybe we're using different skins. I'm on the new one.

This is what I see;

Endangered. Spirit
-
User Offline

Yours says;

Wondergirl
Jobs & Parenting
Expert
User Offline

For everyone else it's;

Username
Member status
User Off/On line

No line unless the person is banned, in the skin I use.

[Wondergirl]

I thought I was using the new skin. I'll have to ask Ben for my money back. Clough made me switch to it because now I can see messages visitors to my profile page leave for me.

Here is what I see:

[Altenweg's Avatar]
Altenweg [underlined] [then a blue dot meaning Altenweg is offline]
Pets Expert

[Alty]

I thought I was using the new skin. I'll have to ask Ben for my money back. Clough made me switch to it because now I can see messages visitors to my profile page leave for me.

Here is what I see:

[Altenweg's Avatar]
Altenweg [underlined] [then a blue dot meaning Altenweg is offline]
Pets Expert

That's the old skin. Orange and blue?

The new skin is easier on my eyes, white background, lighter colors. No, I can't see the messages visitors leave on my profile page, but it's a small price to pay. I get sick using the old skin. Darn vertigo.

[Wondergirl]

That's the old skin. Orange and blue?

The new skin is easier on my eyes, white background, lighter colors. No, I can't see the messages visitors leave on my profile page, but it's a small price to pay. I get sick using the old skin. Darn vertigo.

That darn Clough! I had been using the new skin! I'll find it again and put it back on so I can see canned members get underlined. (No visitors leave me messages anyway.)

[Alty]

That darn Clough! I had been using the new skin! I'll find it again and put it back on so I can see canned members get underlined. (No visitors leave me messages anyway.)

You'll still get a notification that someone posted on your profile, you just have to change skins in order to see it.

I think the newest of the new is Light VB or something like that. Let me check to make sure.

Correction, it's light v2. :)

[Fr_Chuck]

Not sure about the line thing, but yes they are banned,
Now I don't know who banned them, I did not, I merely gave them a warning about it, and was going to allow them another chance.

[ohsohappy]

I think I'm using the old skin. It has a white background with orange and blue buttons. I like it. :)

Also, I see a small - under the name.

[Kitkat22]

And husbands who cheat on their wives is what gives marriage a bad name.

[Kitkat22]

And husbands who cheat on their wives is what gives marriage a bad name.

Thanks ohso.. I just find it irionic when someone wants advice and then gets angry when they don't hear what they want. I love it here and I'm never going to leave again.. I don't think there's a person here who would intentionally try to hurt someone. I know some of us might get a little tiffed at each other sometimes, but we work it out. I would be the first to apologize if I have ever hurt anyone here.

I love this forum.. it has helped me through some things in my life that none of you know about. If I needed you all I really know you would be there and I love you for that.