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filmer07 · Apr 1, 2010, 11:59 PM

I live in Los Angeles and I am friends with this 13 year old girl. I am 19. We do not do anything sexual or anything like that. We just hang out, go to the movies, concerts... etc. I (we) are wondering if it'd be illegal for us to date. Again, we do not do anything sexual.

Extra Description: This girl and I have a lot of the same interests... we both like Paul McCartney/The Beatles. We both love movies, etc

Larken85 · Apr 2, 2010, 12:22 AM

There is a very fine line here. Legally there is nothing wrong with you "dating" her. But Dating turns in too much much more. Do I think you could remain non-sexual with her? Not really. Not if you got serious in anyway. And that is there the line is, even kissing her would be illegal. Just not a good idea man. And I have to say you should stop hanging around this girl too. If you do not have sexual intent (which I severely doubt) then she does otherwise you would have been fine just hanging out.
Of course she has a crush on you, you are an older guy, but as an older guy you need to know better and keep a safe distance before you wind up jail and on the sex offenders list for life. I know a guy who did that with a 16 yr old (who said she was 18) when he was 20. He had to marry a girl just to be around her because she had a kid. (HORRIBLE REASON TO MARRY SOMEONE!! ) So just do not go down this road.

But to answer your question, no it is not illegal to see this girl. Just illegal to do anything else with her which we all know you will. Stop fooling yourself.

jmjoseph · Apr 2, 2010, 01:15 AM

What kind of parents would even allow you to be around their child?

You are legally an adult. Go try to act like one.

talaniman · Apr 2, 2010, 08:39 AM

That would be up to her parents who are responsible for her welfare, and if they approve they are idiots.

Why don't you ask them.

Jake2008 · Apr 2, 2010, 09:43 AM

If you have to ask, I think you already know the answer.

There is a huge difference between a high school senior, and en elementary aged child dating.

I find it curious that you would be attracted to her in the first place. This might be a wakeup call to you that, while perhaps legal, it's not a very good idea. Time to date others closer to your age group.

I can tell you that you would never be allowed to date my 13 year old.

Fr_Chuck · Apr 2, 2010, 12:36 PM

No, the 13 year old child's parents would have many recourses against a 19 year old pediphile ( and this is my best choice of what he may be)

jmjoseph · Apr 2, 2010, 01:25 PM

Originally Posted by talaniman

That would be up to her parents who are responsible for her welfare, and if they approve they are idiots.

Why don't you ask them.

Yes, why don't you ask her DADDY?

This sounds like an immature teenager who's trying to use music and movies as an excuse to steal the innocence from a child.

What good could possibly come from THIS?

aliancemd · Apr 2, 2010, 01:51 PM

Kissing, and... will be taken as a pedophilia... It's not a good thing...

filmer07 · Apr 2, 2010, 03:01 PM

Originally Posted by Larken85

There is a very fine line here. Legally there is nothing wrong with you "dating" her. But Dating turns in to much much more. Do I think you could remain non-sexual with her? Not really. Not if you got serious in anyway. And that is there the line is, even kissing her would be illegal. Just not a good idea man. And I have to say you should stop hanging around this girl too. If you do not have sexual intent (which I severly doubt) then she does otherwise you would have been fine just hanging out.
Of course she has a crush on you, you are an older guy, but as an older guy you need to know better and keep a safe distance before you wind up jail and on the sex offenders list for life. I know a guy who did that with a 16 yr old (who said she was 18) when he was 20. He had to marry a girl just to be around her because she had a kid. (HORRIBLE REASON TO MARRY SOMEONE!!!) So just do not go down this road.

But to answer your question, no it is not illegal to see this girl. Just illegal to do anything else with her which we all know you will. Stop fooling yourself.

I really do not do anything like that with her. You don't have to believe me. I know that I am telling the truth.

jmjoseph · Apr 2, 2010, 05:09 PM

Originally Posted by filmer07

I really do not do anything like that with her. You don't have to believe me. I know that I am telling the truth.

Are you afraid of girls your age?

You are old enough to serve our country, and she is only in middle school. Be serious!

What do your friends think?

talaniman · Apr 2, 2010, 09:44 PM

Have you even talked to her parents? Or is she having to lie and sneak around to be with you? Now that in itself would be a breach of trust and illegal, as she would be going against her parents wishes. Worse, contributing to a delinquency of a minor, and that means jail. That's why little young girls are called jail bait by older guys who know better.

Hope one day you will have a daughter and see, and feel what us parents feel about a 19 year old grown a$$ man, messing with their little girl.

filmer07 · Apr 2, 2010, 11:41 PM

Yes her parents know about it. We don't do anything like that. We literally just hang out

kp2171 · Apr 2, 2010, 11:48 PM

Why do you need to escalate this to "dating" if you are just friends?

Honestly, it's a lousy idea... you want to elevate this to another level... she, what, isn't even in HS and you are out of HS?

Look... I've dated women older and younger than me by more years, but the mental development between 13 and 19 is much different than 30 vs 36...

So... get used to the idea that there are great people you will know that you cannot be with. Happens all the time. Pushing this relationship to a dating level is risky, at best...

hheath541 · Apr 2, 2010, 11:56 PM

Why is a 13 year old even allowed to date? Let alone think about dating a 19 year old?

JudyKayTee · Apr 3, 2010, 06:29 AM

If the parents are okay with this I'd be less concerned about this relationship and more concerned about what will happen next (that will have their consent).

Rocken_Lipstick · Apr 6, 2010, 08:44 PM

Well one night and somthink could happen and you might do somthink like have sex

chantelle1212 · Apr 8, 2010, 07:29 PM

Even though you say you don't do anything with her now, that doesn't mean that its not going to happen if you start dating her. Even hanging around her is going to "tempt" you. I was curious so I looked this up.

•Close-in-age—while most legislation dealing with age of consent sets a single age under which sexual relations are illegal, some jurisdictions (such as Canada[4]), have adopted close-in-age exemptions. In Canada the age of consent is 16, but there are two close-in-age exemptions: teenagers who are 14 or 15 may have sex with a partner who is less than five years older, and children aged 12 and 13 may have sex with a partner who is less than two years older. In the United States, these exceptions are colloquially known as "Romeo and Juliet" laws.
These different defences can change dramatically from jurisdiction to jurisdiction, even between neighbouring states of the same union with the same age of consent.

This doesn't apply to you. There's 6 years between you guys. You even look at her the wrong way and your going straight to jail. I'm 14 and I'm seeing an 18 year old. That's why I looked this up. Its different with me because of the close in age thing... but for you...

Lyingsuns3t · Apr 8, 2010, 11:26 PM

It is in fact illegal to date because the legal age limit is around 2-4 years depending on your state. Like in Oregon, the limit is 3 years apart. And plus it is up to the parents which you should know there going to say no. Who lets their daughter date someone 6 years older than them unless their retarded. Im sorry man, but find someone your own age. Your 19 and a legal adult and she is 13 and a minor. Do the math, sorry.

justcurious55 · Apr 9, 2010, 01:54 AM

Originally Posted by Lyingsuns3t

It is in fact illegal to date because the legal age limit is around 2-4 years depending on your state. Like in Oregon, the limit is 3 years apart. And plus it is up to the parents which you should know there gonna say no. Who lets their daughter date someone 6 years older than them unless their retarded. Im sorry man, but find someone your own age. Your 19 and a legal adult and she is 13 and a minor. Do the math, sorry.

Can you cite your sources for where its illegal for them to date? I've only heard of laws on sexual contact, never on dating.

Otherwise I agree, only bad parents would consent and he needs to find someone his own age.

jmjoseph · Apr 9, 2010, 02:53 AM

Originally Posted by chantelle1212

even though you say you dont do anything with her now, that doesnt mean that its not gonna happen if you start dating her. even hanging around he ris going to "tempt" you. i was curious so i looked this up.

•Close-in-age—while most legislation dealing with age of consent sets a single age under which sexual relations are illegal, some jurisdictions (such as Canada[4]), have adopted close-in-age exemptions. In Canada the age of consent is 16, but there are two close-in-age exemptions: teenagers who are 14 or 15 may have sex with a partner who is less than five years older, and children aged 12 and 13 may have sex with a partner who is less than two years older. In the United States, these exceptions are colloquially known as "Romeo and Juliet" laws.
These different defences can change dramatically from jurisdiction to jurisdiction, even between neighbouring states of the same union with the same age of consent.

this doesnt apply to you. theres 6 years between you guys. you even look at her the wrong way and your going straight to jail. im 14 and im seeing an 18 year old. thats why i looked this up. its different with me because of the close in age thing... but for you....

You are still a child dating an adult.