[darkdays]

Well, it's a good thing you didn't have a child with your ex. Having a child with someone you don't end up staying with is hard, and sometimes hard for the child.

My on and off girlfriend wishes the same thing, to have a family together and she knows we have our problems to solve. She does love me deep down, but she has issues that have affected our relationship, our lives, that she knows, but doesn't admit to. So during this slow phase, I will continue to get my own life together and give her the space and her own thinking to resolve her own issues. The advice I got on here, Im much more clear headed to do this the right way. With what you and Talinaman, Friend4u and everyone else has been saying, Im not going to worry about the things I cannot figure out and put my thoughts on getting a new job and just being a good dad. And with what Kitkat said, even though some of it wasn't called for, the thing about being a man about it really got to me. I was letting things get to me, or maybe letting myself get too let down by them instead of having more control of myself. And I think by being calm and more in control of myself, it will have an impact on how my girlfriend views the real problems in our relationship. She will see that I am better capable of handling our problems and our lives once again.

[vanheart]

Exactly. There's no wasting time on thoughts that do not serve us.
Whether it be you or me, now or later.

If you can master that one. Well.

You are on the right mindset. Taking a step back. Realizing what your agenda is daily with confidence and control. Not being "too" worried about the product. Just that the product is good when you rest your head.

First things first.

[darkdays]

And things aren't looking as bleak as they were now that I've adjusted my attitude about them. I have much more confidence then I did.
Im glad there was a place like this that I could tell my problems to and get advice and support from all different types of people. It's amazing how much of the same problems people share.

[vanheart]

Yamon.

Glad (and sorry) you're here asking.

Hehehe.

[darkdays]

Yamon.

Glad (and sorry) youre here asking.

Hehehe.

Yeah, so am I. Lol.

[friend4u178]

Uhmmmmmm... so I'll just leave you 2 guys to it then :cool:


Seriously though glad to hear things worked out darkdays , just don't fall for that dreaded Demon "False Hope"

[vanheart]

Wait, don't leave me, friend4u... Hehe

Yeah, that's the real demon.

Exorcism.

[darkdays]

Uhmmmmmm ............. so I'll just leave you 2 guys to it then :cool:


Seriously though glad to hear things worked out darkdays , just don't fall for that dreaded Demon "False Hope"

Thanks buddy. I'll stay strong. And if I don't, I'll let you guys know about it so you all can kick me in the butt again.

[darkdays]

Wait, dont leave me, friend4u... Hehe

Yeah, thats the real demon.

Exorcism.

Hey, you guys did a good exorcism. Sorry you couldn't see my head turn around the other day.

[friend4u178]

Thanks buddy. I'll stay strong. And if I don't, I'll let you guys know about it so you all can kick me in the butt again.

Don't sweat it , your not the first and I guarantee you won't be the last ;)

[darkdays]

I guess I screwed up again and Im back in the same spot as I was with my ex-girlfriend and I don't know what to do. I feel like hell all over again. Everything was fine with us. And then yesterday she got into my emails from her computer at work. She saw that some women I know had emailed me, mostly friends and one that wants to go out with me. I haven't responded to any of them in weeks, I just delete them when I get them. Well she saw them. After I got back into my email account, I asked her for the password to her email account and then she asked why. I said that if she can get into mine, why shouldn't I be able to get into hers. What's fair is fair. And then I remembered when we were together on Saturday with our son, I saw two guys names on her phone and they were in her favorites. Anyway, I said if she didn't have anything to hide, then she would easy give me the password. Well she didn't, so I changed the secret question and password so she would never be able to get into it again. But I thought somehow she was still in it because right after I changed it, one of my friends emailed me and she said something that made me think that she knew. I didn't think that she would admit to still being in it, so I figured that if I said something about her to my friend that she wouldn't like, she would definitely respond to that. So then afterward, I called my friend and told her that I didn't mean what I said about my girlfriend, I was just trying to figure something out. So anyway, I wrote my girlfriend asking if she was still there, and she came back saying "what, are you done bashing me now?" Then I knew somehow she was still into it. I told her I just did it to find out, and she said that she seen enough to know that I was up to no good and I couldn't be trusted. I told her that she must be hiding something if she can't let me into her email account and with the fact that she has two guys numbers in her phone. Well anyway, she just says she's done with me. Like it's my fault or something.
I just can't make heads or tales out of any of this. I knew she could always get into my account and I never minded because I never had nothing to hide. Like I said, I don't reply to emails coming from other women, I just delete them. And she makes me out to be the one with something to hide? What about her not letting me into hers and her phone having other guys numbers?
Can somebody hit me over the head and make me understand this.

[talaniman]

Don't trip over this stupid stuff, just leave her alone.

Never argue with a mad female, give her space to cool off. If you weren't trying so hard to be right, and logical, (which you were) then you would have just let her vent, don't argue, and dropped it. Like who cares?

This is her trip, leave it to her. You're not together, and what you do is not her business, so don't get into her guilt trip with her, your only business is with you're child together, personal stuff is off the table. Kissing her butt is not acceptable, no matter what buttons she pushes. Dude, she has issues.

[darkdays]

Don't trip over this stupid stuff, just leave her alone.

Never argue with a mad female, give her space to cool off. If you weren't trying so hard to be right, and logical, (which you were) then you would have just let her vent, don't argue, and dropped it. Like who cares?

This is her trip, leave it to her. You're not together, and what you do is not her business, so don't get into her guilt trip with her, your only business is with you're child together, personal stuff is off the table. Kissing her butt is not acceptable, no matter what buttons she pushes. Dude, she has issues.

Tal, I know she has issues. I just don't know how to deal with them. I mean, why is she blaming me for things when she hides things from me and has guys numbers on her phone?

[vanheart]

That's all some childish sh**t. Adults with kids acting like kids.

Well, the game playing is still continuing.

It thought this was going to be about your son. How the BS won't affect his relationship with you later.

All I see in this post is jealously & dishonesty.

Not good things to base anything on.

C'mon, man. You got to be kidding here.
So what if you talk to women.

Your not with her.

How is it that she knows your passwords anyway?

I don't give that info away. To anyone, not my mother, girlfriend friends or anyone else.
Some things are yours not hers.

I have nothing to hide. And if my girlfriend or anyone else wants to read them, then I say go for it. But at my invitation, not anyone else's.

Sounds like maybe you got something to hide.
Otherwise you wouldn't be so keen on her emails.

What are you guys 16?

[darkdays]

I don't have nothing to hide. The only reason I wanted into hers is because I think she does.
I didn't give my password to her. She knows the answer to my secret question, and all she has to do is answer that and change the password to get into it. And she always changes it to an old password that I had that she knew so I could get back into it.
No, we're not together. Then why does getting into my emails to check up on me matter so much to her?

[Kitkat22]

Thats all some childish sh**t. Adults with kids acting like kids.

Well, the game playing is still continuing.

It thought this was gonna be about your son. How the BS wont affect his relationship with you later.

All I see in this post is jealously & dishonesty.

Not good things to base anything on.

C'mon, man. You gotta be kidding here.
So what if you talk to women.

Your not with her.

How is it that she knows your passwords anyway?

I dont give that info away. To anyone, not my mother, gf friends or anyone else.
Some things are yours not hers.

I have nothing to hide. And if my gf or anyone else wants to read them, then I say go for it. But at my invitation, not anyone elses.

Sounds like maybe you got something to hide.
Otherwise you wouldnt be so keen on her emails.

What are you guys 16?

Leave the woman alone and concentrate on you!

[darkdays]

Leave the woman alone and concentrate on you!

Then why won't she leave me alone and stop getting into my personal business?
She said on Saturday that she wanted to work things out and now this.

[friend4u178]

Change your passwords and your secret question , it's none of her friggin business :rolleyes:

Damn too much drama if your ever going to get over this thing.

[talaniman]

Change your secret question.

[darkdays]

Change your passwords and your secret question , it's none of her friggin business :rolleyes:

Damn too much drama if your ever gonna get over this thing.

I did change it, but she was still into it somehow.