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amykatt · Aug 17, 2009, 06:24 PM

My daughters father died and was never in her life anyway. I am remarried and my husband wants to adopt her. He has been in her life for 4.5 years and she is 6. Is there a way we can go through the adoption process with out spending all the money on a lawyer? There is no one that would fight this process.

Synnen · Aug 17, 2009, 09:58 PM

I wouldn't.

Do it yourself adoption is like do it yourself brain surgery.

Just not smart.

hottiehere08 · Aug 17, 2009, 10:25 PM

Well you would have to fight it and tell who ever u talk to how much the other guy as been around and how much u know that he will still be there for her.

stevetcg · Aug 18, 2009, 05:05 AM

The legal costs should be minimal since the father is deceased. But since there is no one contesting it, you have all the time in the world to save up some money.

amykatt · Aug 18, 2009, 05:48 AM

That's a brief answer and not very detailed. Minimal costs to you might now be the same to me... and I "have all the time in the world" is that suppose to be funny?
I know all that. What I need to know is what EXACTLY do I do? Step 1.. step 2... etc.
Can I just got to the court house and fill out paper work?
Mr. Stevetcg please allow someone with some real more detailed answers address my question.

Synnen · Aug 18, 2009, 05:50 AM

1. GET A LAWYER.
2. Go to court.
3. File adoption paperwork.

amykatt · Aug 18, 2009, 06:00 AM

Originally Posted by hottiehere08

well you would have to fight it and tell who ever u talk to how much the other guy as been around and how much u know that he will still be there for her.

What does this answer have to do with my question?

amykatt · Aug 18, 2009, 06:03 AM

Originally Posted by stevetcg

The legal costs should be minimal since the father is deceased. But since there is no one contesting it, you have all the time in the world to save up some money.

I am not a lawyer. I do not play one on TV. All my responses are opinion based on extensive life experience or from research of credible sources. Please verify all responses with a *qualified* expert in your particular field of concern.

"I am an expert of nothing other than repeating what I have read. Oh, and I'm a pretty good Dad."

What the heck are you talking about!! Stay off my thread question and leave it to someone that can give me some real answers. Thank you ever so much.

stevetcg · Aug 18, 2009, 06:28 AM

Originally Posted by amykatt

I am not a lawyer. I do not play one on TV. All my responses are personal opinion based on extensive life experience or from research of credible sources. Please verify all responses with a *qualified* expert in your particular field of concern.

"I am an expert of nothing other than repeating what I have read. Oh, and I'm a pretty good Dad."

What the heck are you talking about!!!! stay off my thread question and leave it to someone that can give me some real answers. Thank you ever so much.

That is my signature and legal disclaimer. That has nothing to do with you or the advice I posted.

The advice I posted as have others and as will any that follow is GET A LAWYER.

But you know... people offering free help frequently like being told off and given attitude...

GV70 · Aug 18, 2009, 10:35 AM

It is always good idea to have a lawyer but...
1. Check out your State's laws on stepparent adoptions.
2. Contact the court in your county that handles adoptions
In some States adoptions are handled in juvenile court. In other States the family court or surrogacy court handles adoptions.
Ask to speak to the court clerk or another person who can give you information about stepparent adoptions. (Court employees may not give legal advice.) Many courts have an information packet that can be mailed to you. If the court does not have a prepared packet, find out during your phone call:
* Whether the court requires you to hire a lawyer, or whether you can represent yourself
* Where you can find the required legal forms (in some States, they will be available online)
3. Find and submit required legal forms
Typically you will need to provide some proof of this information, such as a child's birth certificate, a marriage license, and a copy of the noncustodial parent's consent. If you hire a lawyer, he or she will take care of this step for you.

4. Go to the hearing
Once your forms have been submitted, a hearing (court) date will be assigned. How long it takes to get a hearing varies based on where you live and how busy the court is. It may be anywhere from a few weeks to a few months.

amykatt · Aug 18, 2009, 12:08 PM

Thank you for some good advice... gv70. That's all i am asking for, not someone else's useless opinions.

cdad · Aug 18, 2009, 01:52 PM

Originally Posted by amykatt

I am not a lawyer. I do not play one on TV. All my responses are personal opinion based on extensive life experience or from research of credible sources. Please verify all responses with a *qualified* expert in your particular field of concern.

"I am an expert of nothing other than repeating what I have read. Oh, and I'm a pretty good Dad."

What the heck are you talking about!!!! stay off my thread question and leave it to someone that can give me some real answers. Thank you ever so much.

I know this is a real shocker.. but you don't " own " this thread and you posted in a pubic forum. Steve is one of our respected members here and has helped many through his diligent research. So save the hissy fits for your husband. And spare us the drama. You got answers. They were solid ones even though its not what you wanted to hear.

Justwantfair · Aug 18, 2009, 02:06 PM

Originally Posted by amykatt

thats a brief answer and not very detailed. Minimal costs to you might now be the same to me...and i "have all the time in the world" is that suppose to be funny?
i know all that. what i need to know is what EXACTLY do i do? step 1...., step 2....etc.
Can I just got to the court house and fill out paper work?
Mr. Stevetcg please allow someone with some real more detailed answers address my question.

Steve's answer was accurate, while you are angry about the lack of details, you are also very disrespectful in asking for some clarity.

Because the father is not around to contest an adoption by your husband it will not be the huge expense of a lengthy custody battle. That is a good thing.

You have all the time in the world because this adoption isn't something you have to run into court and file tomorrow, like some parents do to protect their children. It was not meant to be funny or sarcastic. It was a firm observation about your matter doesn't require immediate attention.

These are good things for you. It allows you to handle this the appropriate way because this is your child we are talking about. It allows you time to gather and save a retainer so that you can handle this legally and appropriately, which is something that you should want for your child.

As you have been advised you need legal counsel for this kind of situation, but you have the means and opportunity to do that.

We volunteer our time and I don't see anyone being rude and disrespectful to you, I would ask the same in return.

Thank you.