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    jsu0272n's Avatar
    jsu0272n Posts: 33, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member
     
    #1

    Jun 5, 2009, 01:48 PM
    Five years and now she's gone!
    So my girlfriend and I have been dating for five and a half years it has been an amazing ride. The other morning she decided that she needed to be on her own for awhile and really figure things out for herself. Let me explain we started dating in high school she is twenty and I am 22. So for a long time it has been me and her and she has never really had time to herself. I am terribly depressed that she broke up with me for seemingly no reason at all but I am trying to be understanding because I don't want to push her away for good. I love her more than anything and I really don't want to lose her. I know she still loves me I can tell because it's only been three days since she moved back to her parents house most of her stuff is still in our apartment, and we talk every night and she even came to hangout with me yesterday she held my hand, and kissed me, and hugged me when she left as she would any other time. I am really confused and any input or advice would be great..
    tropiko's Avatar
    tropiko Posts: 11, Reputation: -2
    New Member
     
    #2

    Jun 5, 2009, 02:29 PM
    Look, the problem started because you love her so much, she had enough of you,
    You could take small steps not to be whit her all the time, its like being in one same room
    Long time and then get on fresh air, you lost her!:mad:
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
     
    #3

    Jun 5, 2009, 03:43 PM

    If you don't to lose her, then don't push her away. Give her the space that she needs. If she looks for you, then fine. Avoid giving her extra pressure. Show her that you respect her wishes for time and space.
    jsu0272n's Avatar
    jsu0272n Posts: 33, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member
     
    #4

    Jun 5, 2009, 08:36 PM
    Thanks for the advice I'm trying to like leave her alone for awhile and let here get it together you know. I'm not going to call and bother her just let her have time I figure if she still cares then she will start missing me and give me a call. If she doesn't then I guess that I 'm just wasting my waiting on her..
    jsu0272n's Avatar
    jsu0272n Posts: 33, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member
     
    #5

    Jun 6, 2009, 09:58 PM
    So I didn't call her or anything she finally text me and wanted to know how I was doing and what I was doing and stuff and so we chatted for a bit later on I asked her if she wanted to hangout sometime she said yes and we planned a date. Tonight I talked to her and when it was time to go I said I love you and she said it back but not as convincingly as usual but she said it . This is just a stressful situation because I don't really know where I stand with her but yet I feel as though I am still being lead on you know...
    Justwantfair's Avatar
    Justwantfair Posts: 3,422, Reputation: 944
    Ultra Member
     
    #6

    Jun 6, 2009, 10:32 PM

    Your girlfriend is right that you both need to gain experience. Read up on the no contact threads to give yourself some perspective on what to do with this time.

    You are both young and you may find out that what you wanted all along was right in front of you, or you may not. Either way taking the time to determine that can be a good thing. Be patient with her and yourself, no one ever forgets their first 'true' love. I doubt she is gone from your life forever. Just take this time to give her the space that she is looking for. Work on finding out about yourself without her right now.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
     
    #7

    Jun 7, 2009, 04:58 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by jsu0272n View Post
    so i didnt call her or anything she finally text me and wanted to know how i was doing and what i was doing and stuff and so we chatted for a bit later on i asked her if she wanted to hangout sometime she said yes and we planned a date. tonight i talked to her and when it was time to go i said I love you and she said it back but not as convincingly as usual but she said it . this is just a stressful situation becuase i dont really know where i stand with her but yet i feel as though i am still being lead on you know.....
    It's not time to see her yet. You need time and space just as much as she does. Until you guys sort out what you want and your feelings, you should stay away from each other.

    You said it yourself, if you guys really care about each other, you will find each other again.

    BUt if you do choose to meet up, then you got to work together to sort things out. Talk it out. Communication is key.
    jsu0272n's Avatar
    jsu0272n Posts: 33, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member
     
    #8

    Jun 7, 2009, 08:41 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by I wish View Post
    BUt if you do choose to meet up, then you gotta work together to sort things out. Talk it out. Communication is key.
    I know communication is key but I'm almost scared to talk to her about it. I don't want to push her further away. I just want to be completely truthful I want to know how she really feels. I want to tell her the changes I have felt since she has been gone which seems stupid cause it's only been like a week, but I have had a lot of time to think and I know where my faults where in our relationship and I really think things will still work out but I'm kind of scared to ask her to many questions. I feel like I should just go hang out with her and have an amazing time and that doing that would almost say more than the words,but I don't know I'm taking all this really hard. Well all I know is who ever you are I appreciate your time because I would have probably made some bad moves with out you guys giving me a little bit of my confidence back.

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