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jojoluvshim · Aug 15, 2008, 10:23 AM

I love him so much. We went out frm dec.1st 2007 until march 27. 2008. We were perfect for eachtoher evryone says. We oved each other so much. And yes we did have sex. We were unseperatable at school and out of school. Buthe broke up with me over spring break. And I want him back so bad. We haven't talked since our frist week of the break up. I feel lyk its all my fault of why we broke up. I have so many reasons f why I think he dumped me but evryone says I'm wrong but they don't know. I think its my fault because I told my parents we had sex first and then he told his we did. Meaning we wouldn't be able to do it again and he wntd to. While we were together I told him I regreted it too. He told me when we broke up " this, i dont need this anymore." I can't get over him. I thought I had. But everything this week has remindd me of him. Songs, TV shows, movies, notes, pictures, billboards, places we had ben, thngs we had dun. And my parents saw him the night before last to make it evn worse. I really don't know what to do. I need help... :confused: :(

talaniman · Aug 15, 2008, 10:49 AM

Calm down, as this is common when sex is involved, especially among younger people, with no experience in coping with loss. We all have to go through this, at one time, or another and with time you will accept the death of this relationship, and grow beyond it. Just love yourself as much as you have loved him, and be good to you.

For more insights, and suggestions, click the link in my signature, and read the 4 stickies.

Sorry for your loss, and good luck.

jojoluvshim · Aug 15, 2008, 12:09 PM

I can't get over him... nd I dontknow why because he's not my first boyfriend. I've had 23 and I'm 15. So I'm not a beginner at relationships. Thts why I'm so confused. I don't get why I'm not over him. And I've already had bfs aftr him but I keep ending it because its not the same or I realise again that I'm still not over him.

mimi03 · Aug 15, 2008, 12:49 PM

So, You've already dated 23 other guys before this one and have dated more since him and you still want him back?

You need to SLOW down!
Stop dating for a while, focus on yourself and your education...
There is more to life than this guy, realize that by giving your time and attention to things that are important to you (friends, family, hobbies, church etc.)

Keep this in perspective... You are only 15, You have real feelings and experiences that validate them BUT at 15 there are plenty of things you should be focused on instead of a serious relationship/breakup... There's plenty of time for heartache later.

jojoluvshim · Aug 15, 2008, 12:53 PM

Yea I know thts a bad thng that I dated 23 guys before him. And I've dated 3 guys aftr him. But my friends are idiots and tell me to get ovr him or tlk to him. Family doesn't care. Hobbies I'm still doing. I don't go to church because I don't believe in god. And education? School hasn't started yet and snt for anothr week. I keep getting reminded of him and I am right now because no air (JS & CB) is playing so is with you( by CB it was our song) on the radio.

Romefalls19 · Aug 15, 2008, 12:54 PM

15 and 23 boyfriends! Wow... Umm.. I really don't know what to say about that. You have obviously gotten over the other 22 and soon you will get over number 23. Perhaps take a break from dating and focus on yourself as a person

Romefalls19 · Aug 15, 2008, 12:55 PM

Originally Posted by jojoluvshim

yea i know thts a bad thng tht i dated 23 guys b4 him. nd ive dated 3 guys aftr him. but my frends r idiots nd tell me to get ovr him or tlk to him. family doesnt care. hobbies im still doing. i dont go to church because i dont believe in god. nd education? school hasnt started yet nd snt for anothr week. i keep gettin reminded of him nd i am right now because no air (JS & CB) is playing so is with you( by CB it was our song) on the radio.

Stop listening to the radio! If something reminds you of him, change it. Put on a cd of angry music, or "I'm better off without you" type music. Rhianna's "Take a bow" perfect example

shane38 · Aug 15, 2008, 01:01 PM

Love is harsh, and I think it got you deep with this one. Maybe because he broke up with you it feels even more harsh than with the others. Don't dwell on him, try and keep yourself busy and hang out with your mates, you'll be surprised how easy it is to forget someone when your having a good time xx

jojoluvshim · Aug 15, 2008, 01:04 PM

Lol I've tried that I've tried evything but nothins is working somehow I get reminded of him or I see him or I find something frm him. Lyk out of coincedence I went to peter piper pizza the othr day with my friend and we went in the slides being stupid and I look up on the slide and there's writing saying junior and jordon forever ill love you... he wrote that lyk 2 months before we brk up one time when we were there in the slide ? How could that still be there!

mimi03 · Aug 15, 2008, 01:11 PM

Originally Posted by jojoluvshim

yea i know thts a bad thng tht i dated 23 guys b4 him. nd ive dated 3 guys aftr him. but my frends r idiots nd tell me to get ovr him or tlk to him. family doesnt care. hobbies im still doing. i dont go to church because i dont believe in god. nd education? school hasnt started yet nd snt for anothr week. i keep gettin reminded of him nd i am right now because no air (JS & CB) is playing so is with you( by CB it was our song) on the radio.

What's really interesting is that you've dated 23 before him yet you are really hung up on this one guy!
So, did you learn anything from the others?. Like: people come and go, Not everyone is meant to be in your life forever, maybe now isn't the time to be dating?

Also, educating yourself doesn't start and stop when the summer begins and ends... Find something your are interested in and learn more about it!

I'm not a religious person myself I just mention church because most people I know believe in god... But speaking of which I am constantly educating myself about different religions and philosophies about life and cultures...

There's plenty to learn and plenty to do, You have to want to...

Just start by spending the day doing things totally different to get your mind off him...
-Write a list of things you'd like to do before you die...
-Go through old family photos or your old photos and reminisce with someone
-Start a time capsule, I started one in the 6th grade and decided I wouldn't open it until 12th grade (it was interesting to see how much I'd changed)
-If you are artsy: write some poetry, a short story, paint, go do some photography

I have more suggestions if you want :)

mimi03 · Aug 15, 2008, 01:14 PM

Weren't there things you really didn't like about him... Try replacing these good/happy thoughts with his annoying habits and quirks!
(If you can't think of anything bad about him, I guess you didn't date him long enough lol)

hjpan · Aug 15, 2008, 01:18 PM

Geez... 15 & 23 guys already?
I'm 19 and I only had one girl.. who left me and became a 8itch

Yeh.. you need to re-evaluate yourself~
Looks like he was just in for sex... 4 months

jojoluvshim · Aug 15, 2008, 01:21 PM

I don't know I'm talking to my friend right now and we are bth crying I can't get over him and I won't I don't want to.

shane38 · Aug 15, 2008, 01:21 PM

The more you think of him and things you associate with him the worse it will be babe. Soz but never heard of pizza place, don't think we got um in britain. I know its hard but you know what they say 'times a great healer'. Soz can't take your pain away

shane38 · Aug 15, 2008, 01:23 PM

Omg gloria gaynor lol

jojoluvshim · Aug 15, 2008, 01:28 PM

Umm OK... idk though I'm scared and I keep seeing him and being reminded of him by everything!

talaniman · Aug 15, 2008, 03:42 PM

I can't get over him and I won't I don't want to.

As long as you have that attitude, you will be miserable, so change the attitude and WANT to get over him, and the radio won't freak you out as much.

When you want to let go you will.

jojoluvshim · Aug 17, 2008, 11:45 AM

yea but I can't I spent 5 hrs last night talking about him with my best friend. We walked and cried and talked and talked. I called his best friend and asked him if my ex has tld him anything but he don't know anything. My ex hasn't told anyone anything not evn me. No one knows why we broke up and neither do. It was all random over spring break because I went to houston for 3 days and we didn't talk the whole time. When I got back we were going to go to laredo for me meet his whole family. But he was already there and just broke up with me that night over a text message saying "f**k this i dont need this anymore" what the heck am I supposed to do?? I have no clue...

talaniman · Aug 17, 2008, 12:50 PM

Adjust your attitude, and stop the boohooing over someone who would treat you that way!!

hjpan · Aug 17, 2008, 12:58 PM

Originally Posted by jojoluvshim

yea but i can't i spent 5 hrs last night talkin about him with my best friend. we walked and cried and talked and talked. i called his best friend and asked him if my ex has tld him anything but he dnt kno anything. my ex hasnt told anyone anything not evn me. no one knows why we broke up and neither do. it was all random over spring break becuz i went to houston for 3 days nd we didnt talk the whole time. wen i got back we were gna go to laredo for me meet his whole family. but he was already there nd just broke up with me tht night over a text message saying "f**k this i dont need this anymore" what the heck am i supposed to do??? i have no clue...

No duh... he was just going for sex

You gave what he wanted.. he's done with you