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    Wildcat21's Avatar
    Wildcat21 Posts: 3,582, Reputation: 435
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    #21

    Mar 2, 2006, 09:09 AM
    "I asked her if she felt like I restricted her and she said no." - YES YOU DO DID - to ask a women a question is to answer it. She spared your feelings on this one.

    "She is VERY clingy to me, or atleast was, and I am sure she has caused some of the problem herself. She restricts herself to me." - she's growoing up and you lowered her interest level - no women will cling to you if she is not interested.
    jc105's Avatar
    jc105 Posts: 162, Reputation: 17
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    #22

    Mar 2, 2006, 10:49 AM
    Thanks guy,

    I am taking your advice and not talking to her. But to say she is sure when she is still crying on my shoulder and very unsure of what she is doing and she told me that. But the other guy... Me and my girlfriend have one thing, honesty and if there was another guy I would know. I don't care if you believe that cause I know her and she couldn't lie to me its not in her. But thanks again for the honest responses. I want you to really understand that SHE never wanted me to go places without her. Trust me. Now if she isn't coming back, that's why I am so upset you SOB cause that is what I am accepting. If I thought it was OK she was leaving I wouldn't be a wreck. Yeah, I guess I have to be a bit of an A**hole to the ladies, but guess what, not a problem now!

    Please respond as necessary, but I don't REALLY think you know the situation as well as you think. You must understand that we have been through a lot of hell together and at this point I have accepted a lot of things. The only truly hard part is sleeping in a cold bed alone. Which she already told me she hates also.
    Wildcat21's Avatar
    Wildcat21 Posts: 3,582, Reputation: 435
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    #23

    Mar 2, 2006, 10:55 AM
    You got to learn about women - they love the drama. The crying part... well... I ca ntel lyou why - especially at her age...

    "honesty and if there was another guy I would know." Nope, she will never tell you. Never. She's would be worried about your feelings. Women lie all the time... I dare one women who posts here to tell me she never lied to a guy - they are worried about your ego.

    Like I've said - 97% of the time it's another guy. And I can tell you why if you wish...
    Wildcat21's Avatar
    Wildcat21 Posts: 3,582, Reputation: 435
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    #24

    Mar 2, 2006, 10:55 AM
    You got to learn about women - they love the drama. The crying part... well... I ca ntel lyou why - especially at her age...

    "honesty and if there was another guy I would know." Nope, she will never tell you. Never. She's would be worried about your feelings. Women lie all the time... I dare one women who posts here to tell me she never lied to a guy - they are worried about your ego.

    Like I've said - 97% of the time it's another guy. And I can tell you why if you wish...

    Dude - this tough love. But, you need to realize women.
    jc105's Avatar
    jc105 Posts: 162, Reputation: 17
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    #25

    Mar 2, 2006, 11:01 AM
    Wildcat, please don't tell me she is sparing my feelings. Because I have talked her through most of these convos myself and feel I do understand her needs. And yes she is growing up, and she may have to do that separate from me to really appreciateherself. When I write something about how she feels, it isn't that I ask her once and leave it at that. I discuss it and want to make sure she isn't sparing my feelings. She is smart enough to know that lying is only going to screw up the friendship she wants to continue. We are best friends and have isolated ourselves with ourselves and that is a big problem. Personally I believe that we should have never moved in together, but that isn't what happened. I also have to accept that it might be what tears us apart.

    I'm not sure why you feel so sure about your understanding, but what you tell me is will help me deal. But I am hurt, so I come here to vent. I know what I need to do to make myself happy now, and will include her if she wants to be there.

    I understand all your points. You don't have to re-iterate. She needs to miss me, and I know she will. She will have to. I am her only friend... real friend, and that I do know.
    jc105's Avatar
    jc105 Posts: 162, Reputation: 17
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    #26

    Mar 2, 2006, 11:05 AM
    I know the only other guy that she would consider other than me. We have talked about him and her. I know how she feels about me, and how she feels about him. He's nice, but that is all he has. She doesn't want another guy, she has made it clear she wants to concetrate on herself and her needs. She wants to know what she would do without my influence. That is why she leaving. Trust me WildCat, this girl isn't normal, and that I know. So to round her up into 97% is false. She wouldn't fit.

    She needs to know who she is and feels that our relationship has defined her more than she has. That is what I know is true.
    jc105's Avatar
    jc105 Posts: 162, Reputation: 17
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    #27

    Mar 2, 2006, 11:17 AM
    Oh a note about the other guy and her need for a guy who doesn't give himself to her. In talking with her about him just generally she explained that every girl he meets is 'the one'. He is all over them. Flowers, cards, blah blah... You know the type, and you think its me. LOL. Not at all. When you say not hanging out with her without my friends that part feels more true which I can work on without her living with me. I know what I need to do. And maybe I will hate her after the weekend. She hasn't always been the greatest person herself. W/E, talk to you
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