[out in the cold]

I think my DIL has mental problems. Sometimes she is a good mother and sometimes she is so wrapped up in herself she doesn't seem to care about my two grandsons. She had an affair with my daughter's husband which has caused our family a lot of anguish. Now that she and my son are separated I never know when I will see my 2 grandsons. They are jerked around from home to home. I never judged my DIL or SIL when this bad thing happened. But she won't even be civil to me. Except every now and then. I don't know what to do. I don't want to fight over these children but they have a right to know my husband & I, too. Nobody, including my son, seems to realize how bad my husband and I are hurting. We have a lot to offer them. out in the cold.

[Clough]

(Question moved from Introductions to more appropriate topic area in order to get more exposure to those best able to answer the question. We try not to post questions in the Introductions area because it is just supposed to be for introducing yourself and not asking questions. Thank you!)

[Alty]

Have you told them how you feel? If not, then I think that's the first step. You are correct, you have a right to know your own grandchildren, and they will benefit from having contact with you and your husband.

I can't imagine how you feel. I have two kids, both my parents and my husbands parents are deceased, they have no grandparents left. They're only 9 and 5, I can't imagine actually keeping my kids away from their grandparents, I know that not having that influence in their lives has affected them.