I think my DIL has mental problems. Sometimes she is a good mother and sometimes she is so wrapped up in herself she doesn't seem to care about my two grandsons. She had an affair with my daughter's husband which has caused our family a lot of anguish. Now that she and my son are separated I never know when I will see my 2 grandsons. They are jerked around from home to home. I never judged my DIL or SIL when this bad thing happened. But she won't even be civil to me. Except every now and then. I don't know what to do. I don't want to fight over these children but they have a right to know my husband & I, too. Nobody, including my son, seems to realize how bad my husband and I are hurting. We have a lot to offer them. out in the cold.