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jvillemaire · Feb 20, 2008, 07:56 PM

I currently live in NH and am a single mother of 2. My 7 yr old has never met her father and he doesn't have anything to do with her so I'm not worried about that, but I am thinking about moving to Texas with my fiancé sometime in the near future. My youngest daughter is 5 and sees her father often enough. He took me to court almost a year ago now and fought to get visitation. We agreed on every Wed, every other Thurs, and every other weekend. Basically it would work out so she sees him 10 days a month and me 20 days. Anyway lately, he's been asking me to keep her on Wed and Thurs nights because he has to work. He is also moving to another town and doesn't want her to sleep over his house anymore because he will have two new female room mates and no bedroom for our daughter. Basically he doesn't call her to talk ever and he's not taking very often. I know that I would need a lawyer and we'd need to go back to court, but my question is do I have any kind of shot in moving her and my family to Texas? I know some split couples that live in separate states and I was wondering how doable this would be, what kind of options I may be up against? When the time comes I will definitely seek a lawyer, but I would like some sort of idea as to what I can do about this, can he actually keep me from leaving NH?

Any advice would be great. Thank you.

GV70 · Feb 23, 2008, 02:28 AM

Maybe the extended visitation will work here... Let him to have two months in summer and two weeks in winter.

Fr_Chuck · Feb 23, 2008, 07:55 AM

Most likely the court will want to see you paying for th travel of the child for him to visit, and allowing him longer periods with child ( and he will have to agree to this) So in the end it will be what he may agree with, esp since he is using his visits, and has shown respsponiblity not putting the child in bad situations. Even not keepig her overnight for the reasons stated, shows a concern for the child also

susangpyp · Feb 23, 2008, 08:01 AM

You would have to work it out with him because the court is not going to let you move without his say so. I think that moving and not being able to keep her overnight any more is going to work against him though because he did not consider his child when he made his new living arrangements. However, it could also work against you because how can he keep her all summer if he can't have her overnight.

Usually when these long-distance moves occur, one parent gets the child all summer and on winter vacations etc. It's going to be tough to arrange this if she can't stay overnight.

He fought for visitation and now seems to be slowly giving it back to you... why? I'm wondering why he fought for it in the first place and why his child is not a consideration in his new living arrangements.

The court will probably be sympathetic to you considering he's making things harder where visitation is concerned but if he wants to block it, in the end the court will probably let him.

See a good lawyer.

s_cianci · Feb 23, 2008, 08:05 AM

Get your lawyer and petition the court for a modification of the visitation order that would permit you to move with your fiancé. There's no guarantee that it'll be granted but you need to at least try.

susangpyp · Feb 23, 2008, 09:02 AM

I would also start keeping a diary of when he's supposed to visit with her and when he DOES visit with her. That can be very compelling. If the current visitation order says W, Th, every other weekend overnight start writing

Wednesday February 27, NO VISITATION
Thursday February 28, NO VISITATION

Saturday March 1, 3 hours visitation

Etc etc.

If you show a pattern of waning interest, the court may be more sympathetic to you. Even if he has every good reason in the world to not visit, the court is probably going to frown on the fact that he petitioned for more visitation and now is not exercising it. Keep a diary of when he's allowed to visit and doesn't. And see a lawyer but keep good notes on your own. That will cut down on he said/she said because you will have written records and he will not.

cdad · Feb 23, 2008, 10:38 AM

How about a solution that doesn't involve courts at all ? Why not have your fiancé move closer to you and this mess can be avoided rather then pushing HIS will upon others ?

Its just a thought and it could avoid expensive legal problems and the father can still have visitation.

GV70 · Feb 23, 2008, 02:32 PM

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/family...dy-187207.html