[QuestionsSC]

I started conversing with a man at work about 11 months ago. It all started with harmless emails. We work for the same company but at different locations. We are 900 miles apart. He is married and has a young child. The emails became more personal and then we started chatting on the phone. A few months down the line his wife went through his phone records and saw where he had been calling me.. they got into it and it was bad for a while but things died down. He stayed in contact with me. He later went out and bought a prepaid phone to use to talk to me. We talked every day and night. It was getting to the point where we were talking about seeing each other. I tried walking away so many times but for some reason he had this hold on me. He was telling me he loved me and that he was in love with me. I know now that it was all lies. He sent me money for a plane ticket and just when I bought it he switched on me. Everyone was telling me that I needed to come clean to her and I battled between the idea of telling and not. I finally sent her an email about the "emotional affair" and right afterwards I started feeling bad so I told him and he deleted it before she read it. He is saying now that he has told her and I am not so sure if I believe him but my question is this?? Did I do the right thing by telling her. I did send it again but whether she knows or not I have no clue? How can I pick up and move on from this. I am not by any means proud of what I have done and I feel horrible. Please help... Please don't be too harsh I feel bad enough as it is...

[MasuBhat]

YEs I THINK you did the right thing. That guy shuld be punished by back stabbing his own wife..

[frm my side.] [no offence]

[imation]

I think that she needs to know, whether by you or by him. You did the right thing because for all the lies he must have told his wife how do you know for sure he would have told her.
Forget him, cheating on his own wife, he is scum

[bellamountain]

Honestly you should have stopped him the moment the conversation became personal. Telling his wife made you feel like you did a good thing but what about her?? You should have just cut him off and left it at that, now you've disrupted their household and family and she is left picking up the pieces because they have a family and she is his wife. If you want to do the right thing just cut off all contact with him and leave her alone. You don't have the right to tell her anything this should have never happened but it did. Many people will tell you they want to know if their husband is having an inappropriate relationship but they really don't, there not being truthful with themselves theirs way too much hurt and pain that comes along with that. You never slept with him so at least you didn't go that far but cut him off and ask him to think about his kids and how hurting their mother is hurting them.

Didn't want to be to harsh but I don't sugar coat anything and I think you would rather hear the truth than a water downed version of it.

Good luck:)

[talaniman]

You are as much to blame as he is, and should share the misery. Glad you feel bad, and hope you learned.

[MasuBhat]

they he and her actually called me tonight.. it was horrible.

Wondering~*.. whay did they said that made you felt horrible?