[BIGKkarl]

Our approved parenting plan provides for "Joint" decision making regarding non-emergency healthcare. One would reasonably assume that this includes the decision to schedule appointments, attend appointments, etc. My ex, who is primary, does not include me in decision making. She schedules appointments without informing me, despite my expressed desire to attend our child's exams (medical & dental). She also cancels or reschedules appointments I am aware of and in one instance gave me the wrong date & time of appointment. Any advice? She has even gone as far as telling me in an email that I am not welcome to attend, threatening me with legal action if I show up. There are no orders in place for such, just joint decision making. There is a separate provision stating I am permitted to attend our child's extracurricular activities...

[N0help4u]

File a contempt of order for her not complying to the court order and see what the Judge says.

[Fr_Chuck]

You will have to take them back to court. Time to go back to court and get things more specific.

[George_1950]

You two need to go to a relationship/social counselor, perhaps a trained minister, priest or rabbi and get some help in working this out. It is my belief that 'joint' plans are unmanageable and unworkable; she may just not have the time needed to get your OK, even on mundane appointments. On the other hand, you need to be an equal partner on the extracurricular activities, as much as possible. How old is the child/children? What you are describing is, in my view, the number one reason for not granting a divorce to parents of young children. Please, do not expect the courts to fix this problem, especially within the context of a contempt hearing; daddy and mommy need to work this out.

[cdad]

If you go to court on a contempt charge for her what you need to ask the courts / judge for is to have all notifications in writing and for times to be reasonable to both parties so both may attend. I had that in court papers with my ex and it turned things around. Also ask the doctors / schools to notify you if they will. Its hard to stay informed when one side keeps weaving down the road of life. Good luck

[Fr_Chuck]

Yes, and I will agree with George, in many cases "joint" plans are almost impossible to control. What if you wanted to take her to the doctor and she said no,? Are you breaking the agreement if you take them to the doctor. And appointments change, and often when a divorce is not going well, children are used to fight other issue,

And many doctors don't want a couple "fighting" at the visit,

So I doubt either of you will find a happy place with this if you both cannot just work together.

[s_cianci]

You need to file a complaint with the court that originally issued the order and ask that your ex be found in contempt. Gather whatever evidence you can and take it to court with you.