[dragonsdespair]

I am new to this board and I have read several of the posts similar to my problem but not close enough.

Here is my problem. I feel like I am competing against a computer and television for his attention. As far as the television is concerned, it is whatever is on that interests him.
The computer has the porn. That gets into him even hiding it from me. I am the type of woman that I would look at it with him but he doesn't want me to.
I don't care that he looks at it but I want some sort of attention that he desires me like he does those women on the porn sites. We have sex maybe twice in a weekend, 3 times if I am lucky and during the week, forget it.
Let me give you some background history on us. I am 33 5'9" @ 155lbs so I am not over weight and I have not just had a baby. He is 37 6" and 237lbs but muscular. I am a part time sales rep. and a college student and he is a computer service Tech. Sergeant in the USAF and a college student as well. So not hard work for either of us. If any for me cause I am mainly on my feet the whole time. The youngest child right now with us at this time is 10 but during the summertime will be 4 so again that won't be an issue.
He doesn't so me any sort of compliments or desire but he can drool and ogle over the women on the computer. I have tried lingerie, toys, I am bi, watching porn with him, you name it I have probably tried it to get him interested in me. I have gotten no reply.
He always wants me to initiate everything and most of the time I get turned down. I am getting tired of being rejected. You men don't like it and neither do we women.:confused: :( Help We are supposed to be getting married and I have tried talking to him without accusing but in a nice way and now we are going to try counseling again.:( :confused:

[George_1950]

I think counseling is a great idea; but a big part of whether that succeeds or not depends upon the couselor. I would read everything I could find, library, internet, book stores before counseling. You sound like you know where you want to be, and he sounds like he is avoiding it. If that failed, then I would try living apart to see what happens, say 60 to 90 days. Then you can reassess the future of your relationship.

[simoneaugie]

You could just turn into a complete rag regarding screen addiction. We no longer have (or have to pay for) high speed internet or cable. That solves a lot of problems I used to have. It is a bit extreme though.

If I were you, marriage to this screen addict who ignores you would be way, way down my to-do list. You're young, live with someone who obviously wants to be with you. This guy, let him marry his screen.

[Choux]

You are only 33 and single... there is plenty of life ahead of you, and you can benefit from the hard lessons that you have learned. My opinion, this relationship is over... The exciting sexual stage of a relationship is over after two years according to a recent study, so if there is nothing else besides sex to cause *both* parties to make a effort to forge a new, different and deeper way of relating to each other, the relationship falls apart.

Have a vision for a better more enjoyable personal life for yourself. :)



Best wishes in the coming year,