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    startover22's Avatar
    startover22 Posts: 2,758, Reputation: 363
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    #21

    Nov 26, 2007, 11:27 AM
    YOu have to remember that you are 16, and soon will be your time to move out where ever you are. Youneed to get through these next years, by protecting your sis, and taking careof yourself. Be strong sweet heart!
    NowWhat's Avatar
    NowWhat Posts: 1,634, Reputation: 264
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    #22

    Nov 26, 2007, 11:29 AM
    I would agree with your mom. In all actuality (and I am guessing) you don't hate your dad, you hate his actions and how those actions make you feel.

    Writing him a letter is a great idea. Let him know how you feel and how apprehensive you are about moving there and why.
    If you can, make a copy of the letter before it is sent.
    ccc2's Avatar
    ccc2 Posts: 14, Reputation: 2
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    #23

    Nov 26, 2007, 11:41 AM
    Dad,
    No one will listen to me you won't talk to me and your wife is just down right mean,
    I have been writing this letter for a very long time and I want you to read it now that I have put it together in words that make sense.

    I don't want to live with you caitlyn don't want to live with you, you don't listen to us you don't care about us you never have you think that my mom puts this in my head well you are wrong you and Michelle have done this on your own, I don't know why you want us or she even wants her kids, you treat her kids like crap and she treats yours like crap is that how a parent is supposed to act letting someone treat there kids like crap if so I don't ever want to be a parent.

    Someday I will be an adult and I will remember this someday you will be old and you will need me and caitlyn and we won't be there because of the way you allowed us to be treated
    This last weekend with you was great but only because Michelle wasn't there to whine and gripe about everything she is the boss of that house of you and you let her boss everyone around me and caitlyn too.
    The only thing I want you to remember is that I will be an adult and when I am it will be my mom that I am close to not you if I have to stay with you I promise that when I turn 18 I will move so far from you that I will never see you again and I bet her kids do the same thing because of the way you treat them

    All you 2 care about is how you look to other people you want to look like this perfect family and you are so dysfunctional its sick and I will work as hard as I can to prove that fact just remember that every thing you do I will remember I will NEVER forget the way you have treated me and the way you have allowed your wife to treat me and my sister
    You think my mom is bad because she has money issues well your wrong my mom would never allow someone to treat us badly she would never allow someone to hurt us like you do.

    You know caitlyn is scared of Brice but you don't care you know he has done bad things and you don't care you know Michelle don't like us and you don't care.
    Someday it will be my turn not to care and I promise that I won't you will show this letter to her I know you will because she is the boss of you she is the boss of everyone she has control and you let her have it.

    If I can find a way to have my name changed and you not be in my life I am going to do everything I can to do that I will also listen write record and watch everything that goes on in your home and I will tell anyone that will listen you wanted me you got me.

    I can't say these things to your face because I fear you but I can write them and someday I will send this letter and you will see how you have hurt me and what you have done to my life you have taken away what makes us happy and you are crazy if you think that we will be happy with you and that evil person you live with.

    We hate it at your house we are treated like dogs just like you treat her kids you are never nice to them and you have to see this just like she has to see that she isn't nice to us so live in your little world of make believe but it will all come back to both of you I swear.

    Don't talk to me about this letter because I won't talk to you but I will tell you that I am sending a copy to the school counselors and the area mental health place where we went so they know about it and everything bad that happens in your house while caitlyn and I are there will also be sent to anyone that will listen to me.

    Keep this letter so you know when I am older and you are an old man you can remember why I hate you

    Cody
    This is my letter I have been working on it for a long time but scared to send it
    startover22's Avatar
    startover22 Posts: 2,758, Reputation: 363
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    #24

    Nov 26, 2007, 11:42 AM
    Yes, cody, a letter will be wonderful. I would make it know how you feel. Especially to your dad. And you know what else, you are a smart guy, you know how you feel, you aren't a "kid" any more, you are almost to the point of being a man, that doesn't mean you don't have to follow rule, it just means that you are able to understand things much better. You are going to get through this. Stay where you have to stay and make it positive sweet!
    startover22's Avatar
    startover22 Posts: 2,758, Reputation: 363
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    #25

    Nov 26, 2007, 11:48 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by ccc2
    Dad,
    No one will listen to me you wont talk to me and your wife is just down right mean,
    I have been writing this letter for a very long time and I want you to read it now that I have put it together in words that make sense.

    I don’t want to live with you caitlyn don’t want to live with you, you don’t listen to us you don’t care about us you never have you think that my mom puts this in my head well you are wrong you and Michelle have done this on your own, I don’t know why you want us or she even wants her kids, you treat her kids like crap and she treats yours like crap is that how a parent is supposed to act letting someone treat there kids like crap if so I don’t ever want to be a parent.

    Someday I will be an adult and I will remember this someday you will be old and you will need me and caitlyn and we wont be there because of the way you allowed us to be treated
    This last weekend with you was great but only because Michelle wasn’t there to whine and gripe about everything she is the boss of that house of you and you let her boss everyone around me and caitlyn too.
    The only thing I want you to remember is that I will be an adult and when I am it will be my mom that I am close to not you if I have to stay with you I promise that when I turn 18 I will move so far from you that I will never see you again and I bet her kids do the same thing because of the way you treat them

    All you 2 care about is how you look to other people you want to look like this perfect family and you are so dysfunctional its sick and I will work as hard as I can to prove that fact just remember that every thing you do I will remember I will NEVER forget the way you have treated me and the way you have allowed your wife to treat me and my sister
    You think my mom is bad because she has money issues well your wrong my mom would never allow someone to treat us badly she would never allow someone to hurt us like you do.

    You know caitlyn is scared of Brice but you don’t care you know he has done bad things and you don’t care you know Michelle don’t like us and you don’t care.
    Someday it will be my turn not to care and I promise that I wont you will show this letter to her I know you will because she is the boss of you she is the boss of everyone she has control and you let her have it.

    If I can find a way to have my name changed and you not be in my life I am going to do everything I can to do that I will also listen write record and watch everything that goes on in your home and I will tell anyone that will listen you wanted me you got me.

    I can't say these things to your face because I fear you but I can write them and someday I will send this letter and you will see how you have hurt me and what you have done to my life you have taken away what makes us happy and you are crazy if you think that we will be happy with you and that evil person you live with.

    We hate it at your house we are treated like dogs just like you treat her kids you are never nice to them and you have to see this just like she has to see that she isn’t nice to us so live in your little world of make believe but it will all come back to both of you I swear.

    Don’t talk to me about this letter because I wont talk to you but I will tell you that I am sending a copy to the school counselors and the area mental health place where we went so they know about it and everything bad that happens in your house while caitlyn and I are there will also be sent to anyone that will listen to me.

    Keep this letter so you know when I am older and you are an old man you can remember why I hate you

    Cody
    this is my letter i have been working on it for a long time but scared to send it
    Holy Crap Cody. You really know what you are talking about. Uhhh, Cody, I am so proud of you that you had the courage to write this letter. Although it is a sad letter to me, by how you feel about your dad, it is the truth that is in your heart. I think the best possible thing, would be to go on and give this letter to your mom as well. When do you plan on sending this? And when is the movein to your dads house date? You amaze me Cody, you have just taken me back in time, I hope I can help in any way possible to make you a happy kid... at least the time you have left to be one! Hugs to you sweet...
    NowWhat's Avatar
    NowWhat Posts: 1,634, Reputation: 264
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    #26

    Nov 26, 2007, 11:52 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by ccc2
    Dad,
    I feel likeNo one will listen to me you wont talk to me and I feel like your wife is just down right mean,and she makes me feel like she doesn't like us.
    I have been writing this letter for a very long time and I want you to read it now that I have put it together in words that make sense.

    I don’t want to live with you caitlyn don’t want to live with you, we feel likeyou don’t listen to us, you make us feel like you don’t care about us you never have you think that my mom puts this in my head well you are wrong you and Michelle have done this on your own, I don’t know why you want us or she even wants her kids, you treat her kids like crap and she treats yours like crap is that how a parent is supposed to act letting someone treat there kids like crap if so I don’t ever want to be a parent.

    Someday I will be an adult and I will remember this someday you will be old and you will need me and caitlyn and we wont be there because of the way you allowed us to be treated
    This last weekend with you was great but only because Michelle wasn’t there to whine and gripe about everything she is the boss of that house of you and you let her boss everyone around me and caitlyn too.
    The only thing I want you to remember is that I will be an adult and when I am it will be my mom that I am close to not you if I have to stay with you I promise that when I turn 18 I will move so far from you that I will never see you again and I bet her kids do the same thing because of the way you treat them

    You make me feel like All you 2 care about is how you look to other people you want to look like this perfect family and you are so dysfunctional its sick and I will work as hard as I can to prove that fact just remember that every thing you do I will remember I will NEVER forget the way you have treated me and the way you have allowed your wife to treat me and my sister
    You think my mom is bad because she has money issues well your wrong my mom would never allow someone to treat us badly she would never allow someone to hurt us like you do.

    You know caitlyn is scared of Brice but you act as ifdon’t care you know he has done bad things and you don’t care you know Michelle don’t like us and you don’t care.
    Someday it will be my turn not to care and I promise that I wont you will show this letter to her I know you will because she is the boss of you she is the boss of everyone she has control and you let her have it.

    If I can find a way to have my name changed and you not be in my life I am going to do everything I can to do that I will also listen write record and watch everything that goes on in your home and I will tell anyone that will listen you wanted me you got me.

    I can't say these things to your face because I fear you but I can write them and someday I will send this letter and you will see how you have hurt me and what you have done to my life you have taken away what makes us happy and you are crazy if you think that we will be happy with you and that evil person you live with.

    We hate it at your house because we feel like we are treated like dogs just like you treat her kids you are never nice to them and you have to see this just like she has to see that she isn’t nice to us so live in your little world of make believe but it will all come back to both of you I swear.

    Don’t talk to me about this letter because I wont talk to you but I will tell you that I am sending a copy to the school counselors and the area mental health place where we went so they know about it and everything bad that happens in your house while caitlyn and I are there will also be sent to anyone that will listen to me.

    Keep this letter so you know when I am older and you are an old man you can remember why I hate you

    Cody
    this is my letter i have been working on it for a long time but scared to send it
    You have a good start. I think you would rather you be heard though. With a few simple changes - I think the letter would be more effective. I put my editing in bold
    startover22's Avatar
    startover22 Posts: 2,758, Reputation: 363
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    #27

    Nov 26, 2007, 11:54 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by NowWhat
    You have a good start. I think you would rather you be heard though. With a few simple changes - I think the letter would be more effective. I put my editing in bold
    I agree sweet, those are good changes, and if you want to add more to your letter, you should. Say everything, and make sure to be as honest as you can!
    ccc2's Avatar
    ccc2 Posts: 14, Reputation: 2
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    #28

    Nov 26, 2007, 11:57 AM
    My mom didn't raise no stupid kids , she says all the time.. if you yell loud enough someone will hear you, well I am yelling I have an older sister she's 22 and has a baby they live a few blocks away and I don't want to be away from them either we are very close. When she moved out when I was 14 I grew up I knew I was the oldest at home and I had a lot to help my mom with and her and I are very close now because of that. I am scared to send this letter but I have to if I want to save me and my sister I have to I worry about showing my mom because if she knows anything about it my dad will blame her we are supposed to go live with him on the 20th of December it was supposed to be Sunday (yesterday) but my sister and I begged my mom to ask her attorney to let us stay longer so he did what ever they do to make that happen, it's the only good thing he did
    ccc2's Avatar
    ccc2 Posts: 14, Reputation: 2
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    #29

    Nov 26, 2007, 12:02 PM
    Thank you for the help on the letter its funny my mom always says to use feeling words
    NowWhat's Avatar
    NowWhat Posts: 1,634, Reputation: 264
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    #30

    Nov 26, 2007, 12:07 PM
    Well, I have learned that if you come at some one with "you did this" or "You always do this or never do that" it puts them on the defensive immediately. They will not hear a word you are trying to say.
    And I really think you want to be heard. So, if you are going to go out on a limb here, you should be heard. Right?
    ccc2's Avatar
    ccc2 Posts: 14, Reputation: 2
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    #31

    Nov 26, 2007, 12:09 PM
    Yes I should, I don't know what he is going to think of this letter I'm sure he will find a way to blame my mom for it somehow, and that's why I don't even want her to see it
    lil momma31's Avatar
    lil momma31 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #32

    Nov 28, 2007, 04:51 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ccc2
    Hello my name is Cody I am 16 years old and I live with my mom and little sister Caitlyn in Bucklin Kansas.My mom and dad were divorced 7 years ago we have lived with my mom always she is the only one person we have even been with in last summer my mom got a lawyer to get more child support and then my dad filed custody we went to court in Kinsley last Monday and my we lost they say we have to go live with my dad and iam scared my sister is scared she cries all the time and so do I
    The judge wouldn’t let us talk and they told me I would get an attorney and I didn’t no one cared no one would hear me the only person that has ever listened to me is the mediator lady when this all started and she said we should stay with out mom and I thought that it would be all over but it wasn’t my dad has been married for about 6 months to a lady that is mean to us she treats us so bad I can't even tell you how bad it is my dad drinks allot and sometimes he drives with us in the car when he is drinking
    We don’t know anyone in the town he lives in and the school is huge iam in the 10th grade and I want to finish school out here in Bucklin where I have been for 3 years now my dad has a step son that has been in jail a lot they sent him to live with other people because he is so mean he hits caitlyn my sister he has crushed up pills and snorted them in his nose he has taken pills that don’t belong to him all of this in front of me and my sister and when we tell my dad he says we are liars and that didn’t happen but it did happen and a lot more than that happens there a lot more than I can tell you in this letter
    I want someone to hear me I need to talk but no one will listen can anyone help me?
    You don't want to run away that will only create more problems for you any your family. Nothing is worse than being alone, and that's exactly what you will be if you run away. Deal with the problems you are having at home the best you can find a hobby or something that will take your mind off the negativity of the whole situation.Do'nt leave that will be the biggest mistake you could ever make "THER IS NOTHING LIKE THE LOVE FROM YOUR PARENTS AND/OR FAMILY"
    lil momma31's Avatar
    lil momma31 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #33

    Nov 28, 2007, 04:57 PM
    As far as your father and his wife goes try the best you can to block them out. Go to the counselor at school and discuss your situation with someone that will listen and guide you in the right direction. Maybe you should also mention to the counselor that your father does have a drinking problem. Try to get in touch with the mediator and discuss your whole situation with her. Also try to contact some other family members while you are at school or somewhere tell them what's going on and maybe they can try and help get you all out of that situation.

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