Hello my name is Cody I am 16 years old and I live with my mom and little sister Caitlyn in Bucklin Kansas.My mom and dad were divorced 7 years ago we have lived with my mom always she is the only one person we have even been with in last summer my mom got a lawyer to get more child support and then my dad filed custody we went to court in Kinsley last Monday and my we lost they say we have to go live with my dad and I am scared my sister is scared she cries all the time and so do I
The judge wouldn’t let us talk and they told me I would get an attorney and I didn’t no one cared no one would hear me the only person that has ever listened to me is the mediator lady when this all started and she said we should stay with out mom and I thought that it would be all over but it wasn’t my dad has been married for about 6 months to a lady that is mean to us she treats us so bad I can't even tell you how bad it is my dad drinks allot and sometimes he drives with us in the car when he is drinking
We don’t know anyone in the town he lives in and the school is huge I am in the 10th grade and I want to finish school out here in Bucklin where I have been for 3 years now my dad has a step son that has been in jail a lot they sent him to live with other people because he is so mean he hits caitlyn my sister he has crushed up pills and snorted them in his nose he has taken pills that don’t belong to him all of this in front of me and my sister and when we tell my dad he says we are liars and that didn’t happen but it did happen and a lot more than that happens there a lot more than I can tell you in this letter
I want someone to hear me I need to talk but no one will listen can anyone help me?

well I can't reallly help you in the matter of having you stay with your mom or dad... butyou can talk to me... cause I have gone through the same things... and I'm aboutyour age so I think the same way lol... you can talk to me ifyou want to =)
ill listen I promise

Hey Cory, I am here if you want to talk aobut this a little more... Sweet heart, I am so sorry you are in this position! Hugs to you sweet stuff, I have to tell you though, if this is really what has to happen, we need to focus on what you can do to make it good rather than bad... I will be here for a bit, if you want to talk about this. I know it must be so scary to even think about leaving your mom, school, and going to a place that you know nothing about, but you can do it sweet, I know you can... Why did the court award dad custody? Why was it said you couldn't be with mom?

I don't know what happened no one would listen to me my mom isn't bad I do know that she didn't do anything she has trouble paying bills and she works a lot trying to make ends meet for us, I don't want to go I will run away I will not trun in my work at that school. Mom says she will move there with us so she can be there all the time but I worry if she does that then our chances of going back are even worse cause she is there and will be more apart of our lives but in a way I want her there for me and my sister

Cody, why would your mom moving closer to you and your dad be a bad thing? Hun, that's a good thing 'cause she would be closer to you if and when you need her. You will get to see her more too.

This is where my family is where I wanted to finish high school it's a small town the one my dad lives in is huge I'm scared of the school I have never gone to such a big school

I can understand how scary that might be. That's really got to be quite frightening. Your mom said she would move near you right? She will be there for you, she is not going to turn her back on you.

Although it may be scary, it may just be a great opportunity to meet a ton of new people, get into new programs like sports and things like that.

I know it's hard, but try to think about the positives.

I agree with J, you have to think positive, even when life gives you these tests. It sure can be hard moving to a new school, but I want to tell you, when I went to a new school in the middle of tenth grade, I remember one person and I remember her well, she is still my good friend, and that was about 15 years ago. Good things happen no matter where you are sweet. You have the choice to make this or break this. I love the fact that you want to be with your mom, and from what you have explained I think I would too! I am so happy she is willing to be by you. It might even be a great idea to start something like a writing book, some where where you can write down random things that happen or thoughts about what ever. Put it in a safe spot and take advantage of it! Be prepared honey, take this on as a challenge to come out ahead, and what ever they give you, show them you can handle it! What ever they don't give you show them you can handle it. Call your mom often. Try and love your dad while you have this time with him, give him the chance to love you too.

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Originally Posted by ccc2

Hello my name is Cody I am 16 years old and I live with my mom and little sister Caitlyn in Bucklin Kansas.My mom and dad were divorced 7 years ago we have lived with my mom always she is the only one person we have even been with in last summer my mom got a lawyer to get more child support and then my dad filed custody we went to court in Kinsley last Monday and my we lost they say we have to go live with my dad and iam scared my sister is scared she cries all the time and so do I
The judge wouldn’t let us talk and they told me I would get an attorney and I didn’t no one cared no one would hear me the only person that has ever listened to me is the mediator lady when this all started and she said we should stay with out mom and I thought that it would be all over but it wasn’t my dad has been married for about 6 months to a lady that is mean to us she treats us so bad I can't even tell you how bad it is my dad drinks allot and sometimes he drives with us in the car when he is drinking
We don’t know anyone in the town he lives in and the school is huge iam in the 10th grade and I want to finish school out here in Bucklin where I have been for 3 years now my dad has a step son that has been in jail a lot they sent him to live with other people because he is so mean he hits caitlyn my sister he has crushed up pills and snorted them in his nose he has taken pills that don’t belong to him all of this in front of me and my sister and when we tell my dad he says we are liars and that didn’t happen but it did happen and a lot more than that happens there a lot more than I can tell you in this letter
I want someone to hear me I need to talk but no one will listen can anyone help me?

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Well. I can help you out. The only thing I can say that you need to go to the school counselor and inform them about situation. Whatever you say to the counselor is between you and the counselor. Then get a video camera or setup a video cam in the room where your (brother) in-law. Then you can prove it to the court system and then you have to placed in an emergency family adoption. Which give you the option of calling your mom and tell the judge what going. Believe me it will work. I work with the DFACS system. I know what it like to be not herd. So I wish you well and hope you a better success and your mom will not have to worry about child support.

May I ask - how old is your sister?
At 16, normally the judge would ask you where you want to live. I don't know why they didn't.
I agree with most of the posts here. You have to try and stay positive. Make the best out of your situation.
Talk to your mom if that helps. Write to her, etc.

I can tell you running away will not solve your problems. It may actually make it worse.

My sister is 9, we had a weekend with my dad this weekend and it was great but his wife and the other kids weren't there my dad didn't yell at us like he always does I didn't get called names by his wife and my sister was happy too its sad that he can't see this, step brother wasn't there either so we felt like we had a place like a home, it has never felt that way before but when we go back and my step mom is there life will be hell again for me and my sister

If I set up a cam and it shows him doing things or the way we are treated will the judge have to look at it ?

I suppose if you had hard evidence of him mistreating you... Cody... take it easy for a second sweet! You don't want anyone getting really angry right?
Did you talk about how it was so nice to be with your dad and how he was totally different with out everyone else there?

Yes he was like my dad use to be a long time ago its never as good as being with my mom but it was a lot better but he don't see that, one time last summer I was on the phone with my mom while I was at dads and his wife was on the other line and when I got off the phone she said you need to tell your dad what you said about me , I dindt say anything about her all I said to my mom was I was ready to come home, she told my dad that I called her dirty names on the phone with my mom and I didn't I would never say the words she said to my mom, my mom would never allow me to talk that way, but my dad believed her and I got punished for it and it never happened, I told my mom when we got home and she called my dad and said those words were never said and all he said to her was well I wasn't there I don't know what was said, but because his wife told him to he punished me for something that never happened, she is mean to us she lies and my dad never listens to us when we try to tell him

And you know its strange because my dad hates her kids too he treats them like crap always yelling at them for the smallest things he is never nice to them and she is never nice to us how can a judge want us in the middle of that

I have been right there... where you are, I have had the same things happen to me. In my case I didn't have my mother to turn to. You are lucky to have a good mom. Remember when you talk to your dad, to tell him how sweet it was for you all to be together. And if you ever have a heart to heart with your step mom, add something like, I will be older someday, I will remember all of the things that happened, I will never forget the good or the bad. That one seemed to stick to the people I talked to. Because you are telling them you will be an adult some day and you will know when they were right and wrong. I am urging you to stay on the right path, make yourself stronger through the things you have to put up with...
I am urging you to be strong

I can't talk to them they don't listen my dad is always rignt no matter what he went 4 months without speaking to me and when I tried to tell him how that mad me feel he wouldn't even listen me and my dad went to a consleer bcause my mom told the courts that we needed to and I told the Man there that I was scared of my dad that he and his wwife are fake and how bad they treat us when the man asked my dad how he felt he said I think cody just said everything and wouldn't talk no more my dad thinks my mom puts this in my head well she don't he did it himself he didn't talk to me for 4months I called him one day and said I don't want to come to your haouse no more and he said that's OK your lazy I don't want you here and 4months later he called me and said I had to come see him

Are you still living with your mom now? When does the custody with your dad happen?

We are with my mom now and until the 20th of December

I am thinking about writing my dad a letter because I can't talk to him if I write the letter I don't want my mom to see it because she will tell me not to say things I don't mean but I hate him and I do mean that