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rbreiden · Sep 25, 2007, 06:02 AM

I am in Indiana. My ex hasn't seen the kids in three years partially because our case is assigned in Arizona and he won't sign the paperwork to have it changed to Indiana and he has supervised visitation per the special master in our case whom since he was assigned has resigned for safety reasons... hes afraid of my ex husband. My ex hasn't seen nor asked to see the kids in a year and a half. Is that abondonment? How do I go about filing paperwork on that?

ScottGem · Sep 25, 2007, 06:06 AM

No its not abandonment. Abandonment is when the parent disappears and makes no contact.

Even if it was abandonment, so what? What do you think that gets you? What do you want to do about it?

rbreiden · Sep 25, 2007, 09:14 AM

Well, if he hasn't sent me a letter to see the kids nor called and hasn't even sent them anything for their be days or christmas or any child support either than how is that not abondonment? Also what I would get is nothing. I won't gain anything from this other than documentation from the courts that he in deed has not done anything for these kids. The child support issue has been for seven years. Ive never received support from him but still allowed him to see them. He hasn't even tried to for over a year for whatever reason I am not sure. I thought that would be considered abondonment but wasn't sure.

ScottGem · Sep 25, 2007, 09:22 AM

Whether its abandonment or not is really moot. You gain nothing by filing abandonment charges against him. So why bother? I would concentrate on trying to get him to pay the child support.

macksmom · Sep 25, 2007, 10:16 AM

In Ohio, its 6 months of no contact and no child support. At that time you have grounds to file abandonment. But again, I go along with Scott, what is the point? Are you trying to terminate his parental rights?

Abandonment is kind of a mute point, even if you file that against him, it doesn't change what he's doing.

rbreiden · Sep 25, 2007, 10:27 AM

Someone told me it will terminate his parental rights. I have full custody and he only has supervised visitation but its been three years since he was arrested for going to their school and trying to see them without permission. Hes got major mental health issues. Anyway since I don't get anything from him and since he has basically disappeared why not terminate the supervised visitation and not have to deal with him causing problems sometime in case he has some crazy reason to resurface.

macksmom · Sep 25, 2007, 10:29 AM

Well it is extremely hard to get his rights terminated. And unless you have someone willing to adopt the children in his place it won't be done.

macksmom · Sep 25, 2007, 10:30 AM

And as far as him "resurfacing" he could do that weather his parental rights are intact or not.

rbreiden · Sep 25, 2007, 10:31 AM

I have my husband now who has been a father to them for the past four years more than their biological father ever has been . He supports them and does everything for them. But it was just something I was inquiring about. Don't know that I am going to actually try it or not.

rbreiden · Sep 25, 2007, 10:33 AM

There is a warrant out for his arrest here. I doubt he has any desire to resurface because of that but you never know. And with his parental rights terminated his chances of causing me chaos would be slim to none but they pretty much are that anyway at this point so I might not mess with it.

macksmom · Sep 25, 2007, 10:39 AM

Well if your husband is willing to adopt the children you may have a shot with the past history of the bio father.

Your best bet would be to contact an attorney, you can call around and find some that give a free consultation. At that time you can discuss with the attorney what the laws are in your area.

You just need to decide weather it is worth the hassle. The bio father isn't exercising his parental right as it is, so if they were terminated nothing (aside from paperwork) would really be different.

Just keep in mind, if you do decide to try it... if the bio father fights the termination it will be an uphill battle all the way.

rbreiden · Sep 25, 2007, 10:42 AM

That's why I've been inquiring about this. It might not be worth it. He disappears on his own so its probably not going to be worth all the hassle and money it will take in atty fees. We have an awesome atty I've had to use in the past with their bio father but I am pretty tired of atty fees. Something I need to debate is are the atty fees and battle to do this worth fighting the atty fees and battles that may or may not occur in the future. Thanks for all the infor guys. I appreciate your views on things.

ScottGem · Sep 25, 2007, 10:48 AM

OK, see this is why I asked the question initially of what you wanted to do. If you said you wanted to have your current husband adopt them, my answers would have been different. If that is what you want, then file for adoption. Get an attorney who will prepare the petition and tell you what you need to do to terminate the bio parents rights.

But if you are not intending on having your husband adopt, then there is no purpose in going through the hassle and unlikley prospect of getting them terminated. For all intents and purposes he has voluntarily terminated his rights by refusing to exercise them.

In the unlikely event that he does surface, you can deal with the issue at that point.