[justhaveaquestion]

My boyfriend goes away maybe every other weekend with his family to a house they have.. all his cousins that he doesn't see often have houses near there [ a few houses apart] and when he goes their he doesn't call often last night the first time I talked to him was at 1230 at night is this okay.. don't guys want to check up on their girlfriend and see what their up to before 1230 at night. I know if I went away id want to call him and be like oh we did this were going here.. and just call na dsee what's up.. why won't he call..

[DrJLHutch]

This sounds like you and him are at two different levels. He's not calling because he doesn't see the relationship like you do. What you need to do is step back and run your life. Sounds like you're heading down the road of dependency. Was he recognizes this and possibly will start to take advantage of you. You may not want to hear this, but I have pretty good sight. When you in a relationship each party holds his own identity. They are identified by their independence, but recognize by their unity. Sounds like you have some personal issues. You need to resolve first before you take this relationship further if not, you will be heard emotionally. My advice may not be what you were looking for but right it's on time.

[justhaveaquestion]

That confused me a little haha.. he only does this when he's away.. and not all the time he claims he's busy and would have called earlier but when he's around his cousin he like.. finds it unnessessary to call me last time he called me in front of his cousin he complained and told him to get off the phone

[Ash123]

It fairly normal.

Not everyone checks in all the time... unless he has done something egregious I think he's acting OK. I know you'd like more but not all people give the same amount in a relationship... See if you can be chat with him about it and get his side if it makes you feel better. But I wouldn't worry too much.

How old are you?
Age can make a difference in how we approach our significant others...

[Ash123]

This sounds like you and him are at two different levels. He's not calling because he doesn't see the relationship like you do. What you need to do is step back and run your life. Sounds like you're heading down the road of dependency. Was he recognizes this and possibly will start to take advantage of you. You may not want to hear this, but I have pretty good sight. When you in a relationship each party holds his own identity. They are identified by their independence, but recognize by their unity. Sounds like you have some personal issues. You need to resolve first before you take this relationship further if not, you will be heard emotionally. My advice may not be what you were looking for but right it's on time.

Ok, I want to make a small defense for the poster.
I agree it is more her issues than his, but this seems a bit of over-analyzing given the modest and truncated original post. I am not sure I would say that she is "dependent", in psychology terms - and he is taking advantage of her - yet... But perhaps if we hear more of the story.

Note: "hurt" is not spelled "heard" and see also "insight" where you listed "sight"...

Thanks and pardon the intrusion, I just wanted to add some constructive angles...

[nicespringgirl]

It fairly normal.

Not everyone checks in all the time....unless he has done something egregious I think he's acting ok. I know you'd like more but not all people give the same amount in a relationship....See if you can be chat with him about it and get his side if it makes you feel better. But I wouldn't worry too much.

How old are you?
Age can make a difference in how we approach our significant others...

Exactly, I think it's very normal. Don't make it a big deal. Try to see things in a big picture and be more understanding about his situation.
It's too much for a man, that must call at certain time and when to call.. it's too hard for them. Their brains operate differently, u know that, do you?;)

[justhaveaquestion]

I'm 17 and he's going to be 19..

[talaniman]

I think you expect too much from him, and he is not willing to do the check-in thing. Let it go.

[Wondergirl]

If I were at a cottage with my cousins, I would be having fun and goofing around and swimming and not thinking much about what's happening back home. He's probably too busy to call and check up on you. Maybe you should also get busy, like read a book or two while he's gone, bake some brownies, try out a new recipe, clean your room, keep a journal of everything fun thing you do every day and five reasons you appreciate life--stuff like that.

[sGt HarDKorE]

Hey may just be busy with his family.

[justhaveaquestion]

You guys sound right.. thanks.. sometimes I just over think things I guess hah