[donotrun]

How do you make a law? There is not a law about emotional, mental, and sexual abuse without enough evidence, there should be a law to prevent this from happening in the first place. To me this is a crime and should be dealt as one.

[Fr_Chuck]

You form a lobby group, then you talk to and entertain a lot of your state congressmen. With this lobby group, you try to get those people elected that will support your view.

But then no law would stand up as constitutional ( Federal court) that did not include due process and proof beyond a reasonable doubt.
This is why of course there is a outcry by the ACLU and most liberals on the Federal Terrorist laws, they allow arrest prior to the actual criminal act,

And of course this is why each person has to be personally responsible and also not stay in such a relastionship.

[NeedKarma]

And of course this is why each person has to be personally responsable and also not stay in such a relastionship.

This is the crux. For the abuses you mention the victim most times has the opportunity to leave but chooses not to.

[ScottGem]

First YOU don't make a law, you elect legislators who write and enact laws for you. So you need to contact your local legislator and ask him or her about creating such a law. You don't need a lobby group as Chuck suggests, but I doubt if any legislator is going to waste time on a bill without knowing a lot of his constituents want it.

The key here is "without evidence". Our justice system is based on the presumption that one is innocent until PROVEN guilty. Therefore, any law that allows someone to be convicted without evidence that is beyond a reasonable doubt, is likely to be unconstitutional.

[GV70]

WITHOUT EVIDENCE??? We are not in 17th century.Salem witch trials dead.

[shygrneyzs]

If you were a homosexual and being emotionally abused, it would fall into the "hate crime" legislation. So how far away are other other forms of emotional abuse going to be looked at, in regards to legislation? In Delaware, verbal abuse towards a resident of a nursing home is now illegal.

To have a law like the one you describe, would involve some heavy petitioning to your Congressional delegation. Plus, how are you going to define "emotional abuse" and what would be the parameters involved? Would this "law" cover everyone from birth to death? How would it be implemented? What would be the punishment? How do you propose to change society? You would have to start at the very beginning of a life and teach tolerance and acceptance, plus a whole lot more. You would also have to go to every home and ferret out those who verbally and psychologically abuse their own children, spouses, other family members, etc.

I agree with you that such abuse should never be allowed to enter anyone's life. You see the results in many walks of life. While I do not have an answer on how to correct all the ills associated with these kinds of abuse, all I can do is confront it when I see it and teach my children not to engage in it. Changing attitudes is a very worthy cause, I just do not know if any law would make it change. There is that old saying that one cannot legislate morality. Even though it is tried, it often fails.

[donotrun]

You form a lobby group, then you talk to and entertain alot of your state congressmen. With this lobby group, you try to get those people elected that will support your view.

But then no law would stand up as constitutional ( Federal court) that did not include due process and proof beyond a reasonable doubt.
This is why of course there is a outcry by the ACLU and most liberals on the Federal Terrorist laws, they allow arrest prior to the actual criminal act,

And of course this is why each person has to be personally responsable and also not stay in such a relastionship.

Sometimes these abusive relashionships last years and the person being abused is not aware of the emotional, verbal, mental and even sexual abuse. Sometimes this cycle is so repetitive in which it is a mind game, and it is difficult to leave. During this time, how can someone be responsible for something they are not aware of and in which they are actually suffering or trying to leave but can't.

[donotrun]

WITHOUT EVIDENCE??? We are not in 17th century.Salem witch trials dead.

It might take time, help, and persistence but I am willing.

[GV70]

I am wondering about this man who had a terrible history with women and now I am dating ...I believe he likes me a lot as his girlfriend but I am afraid of him, I think he will hurt me emotionally. What should I do?

Mental abuse and the ones mentioned here are way worse than physical abuse but I don't see a way were justice can prevail or to prevent this to happen to anyone else.

This guy disrespected me the first day we went out. In the back of my head I was thinking I should let that pass because, I want to be with him and because I am so used to my family who is closed minded about everything and I don't want to be like them. I did not want to take everything so strict either, (as strict as they were) So I still went out with him.

I wanted a relashionship with this guy, it did not start well, we have broken up several times and gotten together again...I am so disappointed because I gave him all my love, time, attention and energy but he is not returning it the way I wish.

OK-I understand you are angry at this guy and you like to change the law with the clearest goal to punish him,right?And because your desire for it is not realizable you want to change the law and to imprison men without evidence?:D

[ScottGem]

I have to say, after reading the quotes that GV70 compiled here, that you have contributed to these problems. You had warnings signs and recognized them, yet you continued with the relationship. You really need to get counseling as to why you would ignore those signals. But I have to wonder about the story the guy would tell.

[GV70]

The therapist there gave me almost two hours of therapy ... Also I will return to talk to her for more therapy and group therapy as well.

Very well ! Let's talk about changing the law and punisment without evidences after your psychotherapy...

[donotrun]

Very well ! Let's talk about changing the law and punisment without evidences after your psychotherapy...

You misunderstood me or expressed myself wrong, I meant with evidence.

[donotrun]

I have to say, after reading the quotes that GV70 compiled here, that you have contributed to these problems. You had warnings signs and recognized them, yet you continued with the relationship. You really need to get counseling as to why you would ignore those signals. But I have to wonder about the story the guy would tell.

There is way more information that I cannot explain in detail on this site. I do not believe I contributed to these problems, I might have been vulnerable, but definitely I did not want or expect abuse to happen in fact sometimes abuse has to be defined to the victim. Even if I had warning signs it is still difficult to get out of a relationship like this and I understand that your point of view to this matter of abuse is difficult, but me being the victim, and having lived it, and over with now, I understand abuse and victims of abuse better. I need counseling of course, because of the damage he did to me which still remains. The guy would lie, or course.

[GV70]

You misunderstood me or expressed myself wrong, I meant with evidence.

How do you make a law? There is not a law about emotional, mental, and sexual abuse without enough evidence, there should be a law to prevent this from happening in the first place. To me this is a crime and should be dealt as one.

Try again...

[donotrun]

Try again...

Whose side on you on? The victim or the abuser?

[GV70]

Whose side on you on? The victim or the abuser?

When I post on Family LAW board -it does not matter.It is the law,it is not feelings

[donotrun]

When I post on Family LAW board -it does not matter.It is the law,it is not feelings

There are several people I can take advice from (that is why I am on this site)and I am glad there are members that reply with an open mind and in such an understating and smart manner, I am looking forward to members like that. I have a lot to debate about abuse and laws pertaining to this and I know laws have nothing to do with feelings. I will not debate with you on this site, since you seem somewhat stubborn, If you want to debate this subject try somewhere where putting your point across will have real results. I will put you on the ignore list but don't feel offended. There are more people you can chat with.

[NeedKarma]

Here let me help you understand. Originally you posted "without enough evidence" then you posted "with evidence". Which one is it? It kind of makes a difference.

[donotrun]

Here let me help you understand. Originally you posted "without enough evidence" then you posted "with evidence". Which one is it? It kinda makes a difference.

It is with evidence but it is hard to prove. When I said "without" that is what the law presumes because most of it is not seen but for me or others to be debated, evidence can be medical records, recordings, witnesses, and maybe his past history including criminal records. This is what I can tell you at the moment but of course I would have to learn more, and research if I decide to do so.

[NeedKarma]

My wife does family law and emotional abuse seems to be quite well defined by the law here. Most reasonable persons know when they are being abused and takes steps to correct it or remove themselves from the situation. The problem occurs when one party knows about the others person propensity to abuse and yet decides to pursue the relationship. Abuse is bad of course but it takes two to make that scenario work.