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    luvabubble's Avatar
    luvabubble Posts: 33, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jun 8, 2007, 08:16 PM
    Why did he lose it?
    Hey there, my boy and I have been together for a long time, I am 18 and he is 19... there was a situation which I am confused about... sex has never been a topic for him and I until now, we have never had sex or oral sex besides the whole dry sex thing where clothes stay on... the other night when I stayed at his place he told me he wanted to make love to me and that he was ready.. so I then told him I was ready too... but as he was about to put himself inside of me he completely lose his excitement... what happened there? Is he scared for himself or for me?
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #2

    Jun 8, 2007, 08:20 PM
    Oh, girl, don't be upset. This is perfectly normal. It is called nerves. It happens quite frequently "the first time."

    He may have been afraid that he would hurt you, he could have been afraid that he would not be "good enough." There are many many reasons, but it is normal, so don't beat yourself up over it. Okay.
    luvabubble's Avatar
    luvabubble Posts: 33, Reputation: 1
    Junior Member
    		  
    #3

    Jun 8, 2007, 08:22 PM
    Thanks for that buddie? Does it make a difference if I have made love before and he hasn't? You think he might be intimidated?

    Oh and he also mentions about the "right setting"
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #4

    Jun 8, 2007, 08:31 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by luvabubble
    does it make a difference if i have made love before and he hasnt? you think he might be intimidated??
    Oh, yes, that could certainly be an issue with him. Does he know you have been intimate before?

    You see guys are afraid that they will not perform well enough for us girls. They are afraid that they will not satisfy us. He very well could have been experiencing performance anxiety.

    Just don't make a big deal about it. Don't even bring it up unless he does first, that could possibly make his anxiety worse.
    sugarpiehavoc's Avatar
    sugarpiehavoc Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Jun 8, 2007, 09:03 PM
    I think I agree with everyone. Your boy probably had performance anxiety. It's nothing to be worried about. Maybe he's just not as ready as he thought. It's funny, when boys are in that age bracket they can beat it by themselves for 20 times a day and not stress. The second they're around anything that excites them, they freak a little. Don't forget, men are typically viewed to be the strong ones so, they have a hard time admitting weaknesses.
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