[berrysweetncgurl]

I had been together with my boyfriend for 2 years, we have a 10 month old son together. We split up 2 months ago because of his drug addiction, he kept running off on binges every month or so and coming home with an empty wallet and I couldn't take it anymore so I kicked him out. He tried to still be with me, so I told him if he could kick the habit we could work on the relationship. Then he got really cracked out and started pushing me away. So I gave him his space and watched him wither away. When I quit coming around him all of a sudden he wanted me and would do anything to be with me. So I gave him another chance but still didn't let him move back in. As soon as I started trying to make it work again, he started pushing away again. I kept asking him to stop stringing me along and if he didn't want me, let me know. Ok fast forward now to 2 weeks ago, I was doing good, I was getting over him, or at least I thought, I felt better and when I came around him I made sure that I didn't let him get me down. So he started talking about he wanted to still be together. We spent a great night together and I was excited. We promised each other from the beginning of the breakup we wouldn't see anyone else for the time being and would definitely not bring another man/woman around our little boy. So I went over the other night to make him dinner at his house and he come out of the neighbors house with a cup of sugar, (she is the neighborhood ho, she sleeps with his roommate, has a boyfriend, and still messes with both of her baby's fathers) I was pretty pissed off.(by the way they had sugar at home?? ).. so I left and calmed down. Well I went back over last night and his roomates told me he wasn't home, but I went in his room and my kids car seat was in there (he was supposed to babysit him last night) so I knew something was up, I rode down the drive and he come out of her house with my kid (he said my kid was playing with her little girls, but my little boy was asleep:mad: ) Now he tells me to move on, Im so mad, I don't know what to do, I know I should leave him alone but it is so hard when you have a kid with someone and you love them. Plus every time I do leave him alone and start getting over him he weasels his way back into my heart and then just tears me up again. Im so tore up over this, I thought he loved me so why is it so easy for him to be cold to me and treat me like this? All I ever tried to do was help him be a better person by getting off drugs. Does anyone have any advice on how to get over someone you still have to see 2-3 times a week because you have a child with them? Anyone going through anything similar? It hurts so bad I don't know what to do

[fix-what-you-broke]

Take it from experience, you will NEVER ever change a drug addict,you can beg,scream,plead and it will not work, they have to make the decision themselves.
I know that you love this guy, but this relationship is not healthy for you or your child.
Only contact this guy if it is about your child,other than that let him go and realize what a mistake he has made by losing his family over drugs.

[InTheArmsOfGod]

Umm have you thought about getting full custody of this child and forcing him to clean up otherwise he will never see his child again? The problem is, you keep allowing yourself to get hurt by having him in your life. Yes, he's the father of your baby, but do you really want a drug addict recovered or not around your child or around you for that matter. That's not a healthy situation any way you look at it.

I don't know your background or financial situation, but you seem like a smart girl and I think you have to do what's best for you and your child. Keeping him around so he can hurt you over and over and possibly hurt is child just spells disaster.

We're not going to provide the answer for you, that's up to you. My advice is to distance yourself from this individual. It is a test of wills, but you must do it.

[berrysweetncgurl]

I am so depressed about this today:( Me and this guy haven't spoke for a couple of days and today he started calling early this morning about getting our son, I didn't answer his calls because I am worried he is going to try and take my son and keep him. So when I had to come to work I took my little boy to his grandmas house and she told me that my ex (her son) had called her earlier to try and borrow some money tp take this girl out today, I am so heated up because he won't even pay a dime of support to me for his son and now he is trying to borrow money to take her out?? Also he was trying to get my son so bad today, what was he going to do make a "family day" with the new girl and my son??

[Mom of 2]

First, you did the right thing in the beginning by kicking the bum out. You and your child do not need to have a drug addict around. Do you have proof that he is a drug addict? Does he have an arrest record, DUIs, anything that you can use against him in order to get sole custody? Having him submit for a drug test would also be in your best interests.

I have another thought, he is probably mad about the fact that you were the one that originally dumped him. The only reason that he wanted to get back together with you is because he wanted the chance to dump you.

In regards to him dating someone else, you have no control over that. I know it hurts, but it is something that you need to get over. Let this new girl have your drug addict ex boyfriend. It is unfortunate that he is not following through with what the both of you promised by not bringing other people around your son, but I would not think that a drug addict would be a very truthful or trusting individual. Why do you think that he would follow through with this promise? Only time will heal all wounds. You said that you were starting to get over him and then you took him back. If you could do it once, then you can do it again. Whatever you do, don't take him back. Go to a single mom's support group in your community. They are often free and are a good way to speak with women in similar situations. I belong to one and I can't even begin to tell you how much it has helped me. Hope this helps!!