Should I say yes?

Thinkaboutit · Jan 11, 2015, 07:45 PM

Thanks that sounds good just didn't want to say too much don't want people to know how stupid I've been but that sounds good. I don't blame you for thinking I didn't listen I'm kind of good at that but I'm trying to do better wish me dad would talk to me more it would be nice to be able to talk to him instead.

Alty · Jan 11, 2015, 07:57 PM

Kiddo, I get it. I've never messed up as bad as you did, but I wasn't a perfect teenager. No one's perfect. NO ONE!

You made a mistake, you're young, you now have the chance to make it right. I believe I told you in your first post here that it wouldn't be easy to gain back your dad's trust, and it wouldn't happen overnight. But keep making good decisions, good choices, and it will happen. Your dad loves you, he's just not sure how to handle all this. Parents aren't omnipotent, we're just human beings. We don't know how to handle everything that comes along, and you kids don't come with handbooks. We play it by ear most of the time, and sometimes we do the right thing, and other times we don't.

Give your dad time. Until then, we're here. As long as you're willing to listen, I'm willing to answer. I may not always say what you want to hear, but I'll answer the way I would answer one of my kids, one is 3 years younger than you, the other is a year older.

I wish you could talk to your dad too, that would be the best thing. But if you can't, at least you're on a site where people care, people will give you good advice, and they won't steer you in the wrong direction. :)

Thinkaboutit · Jan 11, 2015, 08:35 PM

Thanks I understand why dad is being the way he is.I know what I have to do to get my dad to see that I'm trying to change. Just hope I can make the right choices and stay out of trouble. Hope this guy understand I really just want to do my job I don't mind being friends with him at work but I know if its more than that ill probably end up doing something dumb. So thanks for the advice

Thinkaboutit · Jan 14, 2015, 02:41 PM

I didn't got to work today called in sick, not sure if I can go back. The bosses son was talking to me yesterday and said he heard I liked to take pill and party so why won't I go out and have some fun with him and his friends. I told him I don't do that anymore. He said some pretty horrible things made me want to cry. I can imagine what people must think of me. I don't want to go back and work with him but if I quit I don't think it would look good either me dad would probably think I just couldn't handle it. Don't know what to do, I would have liked to punch him in the face can't believe I ever liked him

joypulv · Jan 14, 2015, 02:53 PM

Yes you CAN go back! You don't work for this guy. Steer clear of him and answer only to his father.
Do you have the sense now that he really did expect you to put out? Of course he did, and he doesn't give a ##%%$^ about anything except sex, because now he's angry, or at least annoyed. Good, he deserves to me annoyed. Poor selfish entitled boss's son.
Don't give anyone the satisfaction of quitting. Go back to work tomorrow, do you job, and IGNORE him.
If you think it's necessary, tell his father that you would prefer to able to not have to interact with his son except for basic work reasons. Don't say why. That puts you on record as wanting to keep your distance, in case the son decides to start rumors.

Homegirl 50 · Jan 14, 2015, 02:54 PM

You can share what happened with your dad. Ask him what he thinks you should do.
Go to work. Do your work and stay clear of him. If he approaches you again report him to his dad.

Cat1864 · Jan 14, 2015, 03:04 PM

I think you did a great job explaining to him that you are turning your life around. What he thinks doesn't matter because he just showed how immature he is and what his real intentions were.

In all honesty, you will have to learn to ignore those who want to focus on your past as you work to build a better future. As you show people through your hard work that you are changing, your reputation will change.

I suggest going back with your head held high. Do your job to the best of your ability. Learn all that you can from the job including how to work with people who you rather wouldn't. Hopefully end up with a glowing recommendation from your employer for your next job.

If the son continues to be a hostile or abusive, very calmly talk to your employer and see how things go from there. It may be the boss' son, but it should be handled as professionally as you can.

Good luck.

Thinkaboutit · Jan 14, 2015, 05:24 PM

Thanks for the advice. Not to sure I can face him again, he said some pretty mean things to me. But I suppose I should go back it will be hard he made me feel really horrible I suppose its me own fault .But if he touches me again I swear I will punch him even if I do lose me job and me dad be angry with me

Wondergirl · Jan 14, 2015, 05:29 PM

Originally Posted by Thinkaboutit

Thanks for the advice. Not to sure I can face him again, he said some pretty mean things to me. But I suppose I should go back it will be hard he made me feel really horrible I suppose its me own fault .But if he touches me again I swear I will punch him even if I do lose me job and me dad be angry with me

No punching. Act like a lady, not a little kid. Just turn your back on him and walk away. He WANTS to get a reaction out of you. Don't let it happen.

Thinkaboutit · Jan 14, 2015, 05:40 PM

I understand that but its not going to be easy if I hadn't of been so upset yesterday I would have hit him when he tried to feel me up yuk. I don't really want to ever see him again. I'm just going to stay away from him and hope he doesn't come near me.

Cat1864 · Jan 14, 2015, 06:11 PM

Try to stay away from him but do not allow it to affect your job.

If he puts his hands on you, immediately report it to your boss and your father.

Thinkaboutit · Jan 15, 2015, 01:06 AM

I will try to stay away from him but something's we have to do together. I'm just going to pretending didn't happen. If he does it again I don'tknow what I'll do guess I will just walk away. Hopefully he will leave me alone

joypulv · Jan 15, 2015, 05:07 AM

If he touches you, shout DON'T TOUCH ME as loud as you can. Usually that's enough. He needs to know you mean it.
Too many teen girls, having been brought up to be nice to people, don't understand that it's OK to be really assertive, sometimes in a 'mean' sounding way, at times.
This is one of them.

Thinkaboutit · Jan 15, 2015, 06:15 AM

I couldn't do that people would think I'm mental. It would be embarrassing! If he does it again I'll just, I don't know, hopefully he got it yesterday he ain't getting nothing from me. I just don't even want to go back but I know I eed to do this so me dad doesn't think I'm just quitting cause its hard.

joypulv · Jan 15, 2015, 06:21 AM

You are wrong about what people would think. He tried to feel you up! If you don't want to shout, then speak loud enough for people to hear, but in a low voice, with your teeth clenched, and very slowly and enunciated -
DON'T
TOUCH
ME
There's no one in the world who doesn't get that.
Good practice for the future. I assume that you are an attractive girl.

Thinkaboutit · Jan 15, 2015, 06:28 AM

See the thing is he's me bosses son if I did something like that I'd probably lose me job. I been thinking heaps about it and I need to keep this job so I can show me dad I can change and make good choices. If I punch him or yell at him I'm going to lose me job I mean who would believe me anyway.

talaniman · Jan 15, 2015, 06:39 AM

You simply tell your boss and let him handle it. If you cannot stand for yourself and do what's right then all those good intentions and high hopes are out the window, and the snot just keeps using and abusing you. Probably has been doing it a long time to others, and sees you as an easy mark in the first place.

If you cannot stand for yourself in someway, you will fall for whatever this guy puts down for you.

catonsville · Jan 15, 2015, 07:18 AM

Stop the "Woe is Me" put your big girl boots on and do what the ladies here have told you to do. They are right and you need to get it done. This is getting to be" a soap opera".

J_9 · Jan 15, 2015, 07:22 AM

Stop playing the martyr and do what you have been told to do. Feeling you up is sexual harassment.

joypulv · Jan 15, 2015, 07:47 AM

It is sounding more and more like your whole partying past was an effort to be liked because you have always felt unloved and inadequate.
You have changed your outward actions, but not your inner sense of self esteem.
You CAN tell him not to touch you in a firm voice! You don't have to yell. No one said anything about punching. I said 'loud vioce' so that he would know that others heard you, and so that you MEANT it.
If you want to keep making excuses, then all your efforts to be someone secure in herself are lost.
I say tell him and others here say tell his father.
I'm just not sure how you will say it to his father, and think those 3 little words directed at the SON are better.
For all anyone knows, the father is protective of his son.