do I need help?
It sounds like you do need help in bolsterring your sense of self worth. You should never tie your happiness to the actions of another. You must love yourself for who you are knowing that you are a worthy and valuable person all to yourself.
Check out these books
FEELING GOOD THE NEW MOOD THERAPY
By David Burns And
FEELING BETTER, GETTING BETTER, STAYING BETTER
By Albert Ellis
And of course, if you ever do feel like ending you life call a cricis line immediately and if you are depressed for over two weeks seak professional help.
Best wishes,
Dwalex
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