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    jac4444's Avatar
    jac4444 Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #21

    Sep 24, 2013, 07:25 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by J_9 View Post
    Indicates that you are going to have her charged and arrested for abandoning your child. That is not your case.

    You are trying to do the right thing, but using the wrong terminology.
    Yep that is why I am on here trying to get right terms. And opions
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    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #22

    Sep 24, 2013, 07:27 PM
    You need to go and get this modified one way or another, whether your wife adopting or going for a modification. As far as your wife adopting though its slim to none that you can do that without the mothers consent. I am sure she would fight it since she doesn't want your daughter having a passport. Going for full custody on the grounds that she plays such a small part in her life would probably be better.
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #23

    Sep 24, 2013, 07:32 PM
    What you do is go to court for modification of custody on the grounds of abandonment, not abandonment charges.

    For your wife to adopt, your ex would have to consent to her termination of parental rights. I don't see that happening in this case.

    Now, I'm not sure about Ohio law, but in many states a child who is "abandoned" for a certain period, this includes no FB, no phone calls, no child support, etc. may be able to have her parents petition the court for adoption. In Tennessee it is 6 months of total and complete no contact, including child support, I believe.
    jac4444's Avatar
    jac4444 Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #24

    Sep 24, 2013, 07:32 PM
    Yes you r right. I will probably take that rte as well. The standard course of action.
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    jac4444 Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #25

    Sep 24, 2013, 07:36 PM
    Think Ohio is 90 days with no contact. A person trying to reestablish contact after this is still abandoned the child weather paying support or no. However the person cannot be found. That is my interpretation. I can be wrong about that.
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    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #26

    Sep 24, 2013, 07:38 PM
    Go to court for a modification. You don't need an attorney for this. You will, however, for adoption.

    Contact your local family court. They will guide you in the right steps to take.
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    jac4444 Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #27

    Sep 24, 2013, 07:44 PM
    Trust me the lawyers have done nothing but increased my child support and lost visitation on paper when I was the payee. Now I did residential parenting on my own. And being mr.mom helped out too... lol... but now I did not think the ex would lay a goose egg on her daughter. But it is her loss and my gain. Dr dentist appointments have become much easier and contacting teachers at school as well.
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    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #28

    Sep 24, 2013, 07:46 PM
    Like I said, you can do this on your own. The adoption, however, is another matter. You will need attorneys for that if you choose to go that route.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #29

    Sep 25, 2013, 03:09 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by jac4444 View Post
    It is more of getting full custody and not having to worry abt any contempt charges. For 4 month i would meet at our dropping off point she would not show.i said the hell with it and quit showing up.
    I wouldn't claim abandonment here. I would simply show the court that you faithfully kept your end of the visitation for a month or more. And that even after you stopped, the mother made no move to have the visitation order enforced. Therefore you are asking that you be giving full legal and physical custody. Mention that you wish to get your daughter a passport for vacations and the mother is blocking it. Show that your daughter wants nothing to do with the mother.

    Check to see if there are law schools in your area, some provide clinics that can help you prepare paperwork and strategy.

    But, if you properly document and present your case, I would think you stand a good chance.
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    jac4444 Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #30

    Sep 25, 2013, 06:48 AM
    Yes my daughter is all ready to talk to the judge and even her ex boyfriend is tbere for evidence 3 rd party. He is even going to file for full custody on his 2 boys with her. I told him let me know when you file because I am going to ask her then for full custody I doubt she will. Since she thinks she is mother of yr. I figure I would talk to cps about the guidelines of abandonment. Before doing so I have an ace in the deck to force the hand.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #31

    Sep 25, 2013, 07:04 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by jac4444 View Post
    Yes my daughter is all ready to talk to the judge and even her ex bf is tbere for evidence 3 rd party. He is even going to file for full custody on his 2 boys with her. I told him let me know when you file becuz i am going to ask her then for full custody i doubt she will. Since she thinks she is mother of yr. I figure i would talk to cps abt the guidelines of abandonment. Before doing so i have an ace in the deck to force the hand.
    Again, I would NOT talk to CPS at all. And I would not play the abandonment card. The simple fact of the matter is that you have a visitation schedule. You have tried to keep up your end of the schedule. However, after repeated failures on her part, you want the schedule requirement to be dropped. And you also want full legal custody so you are not dependent on her to make decisions about raising the child.
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    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #32

    Sep 25, 2013, 07:10 AM
    Do NOT talk to CPS. Whatever you do, do not talk to them.
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    jac4444 Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #33

    Sep 25, 2013, 08:31 AM
    Ok. Hey you all been great. I will take the advice and get my kiddo.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #34

    Sep 25, 2013, 09:24 AM
    Good luck and keep us posted
    jac4444's Avatar
    jac4444 Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #35

    Sep 25, 2013, 09:26 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by ScottGem View Post
    Good luck and keep us posted
    Thanks give me a month or two.I am sure it will stir up a hornets nest... lol...

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