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Bettylalu18 · Jul 31, 2013, 06:00 PM

Hi my name is Queenstar, and I'm a 21 year old Ghanaian female and I'm always dressed properly and I'm also very respectful but if there's something I noticed, it's that guys never approach me or ask me out and its something I don't understand. Is it because they don't feel attracted to me like they do to the blacks, hispanics, and white females? I mean guys always approach and flirt with my female friends, classmates, and relatives. And sometimes it's guys I have a crush on. I don't mean to sound jealous or anything. I mean at age 21 people would have expected me to start dating by now. Every time I see guys I like and I approach them, they say eww get away from me then they shove me away and call me a pest. It's as if they prefer my female friends and classmate to me and I never did anything to anyone. Whenever I go out I see lots of girls/women being checked out by guys and being called sexy and all that. And when I walk by, they grow disgusted and say they would never date me and If they were to rate me they would give me a 4 out of 10. I'm not that desperate to be imitating the other girls that behave like whores and I'm not showing off my body either. I really don't want to be a turn off to guys. What do you think could be wrong?

Wondergirl · Jul 31, 2013, 06:06 PM

I don't know you at all. You have known yourself for 21 years. What do think might be going on?

Alty · Jul 31, 2013, 06:43 PM

It sounds like you're hanging out with a very immature group of people. I would not expect this kind of behavior from adults, and at 21, you're all adults.

Fr_Chuck · Jul 31, 2013, 08:57 PM

Still sounds like you are hanging around high school guys,

And rating you 4 out of 10, adults don't do this.

I am sorry, it sounds like you are 15, not 21.

But you go out and meet more professional men, who wishes you to look and dress better,
If you want losers like you talk about here, dress and talk like a whore and they will have more interest

N0help4u · Jul 31, 2013, 09:51 PM

Your other post you are being bulled by women. You say guys do tell you they would never date you and they go as far as to este you. Talk to one of these guys that you feel you would be nost comfortable with and tell him you really need some constructive criticism on what males people go ewwww. Then. Get back to us with what he or they say and we can better help you.

J_9 · Jul 31, 2013, 10:22 PM

I approach them, they say eww get away from me then they shove me away and call me a pest.

Are you certain that these are 21 year olds? I do know of 12 year olds that might act like that, but not many 21 year olds.

joypulv · Aug 1, 2013, 03:38 AM

Just curious about one remark you made: you are from Ghana but are not black, hispanic, or white? And where do you live now? And if guys are attracted to your relatives as you say, aren't they your race too, and so what would race have to do with this?
To be very blunt, we don't know what you look like nor how you approach other people, both men and women. Plenty of people who aren't considered mainstream good looking do just fine by being friendly. Maybe your approach is awkward and uncomfortable? Maybe you try too hard? The easiest way to be friendly is to
a) say something nice about someone to their face
b) ask them about themselves
It bothers me that you are getting 'rated' when that shouldn't even come up, unless you are asking guys if they would date you.

N0help4u · Aug 1, 2013, 05:55 AM

OP said about girlls at school bullying her. Came back and put this up. I don't think she even bothered to reply to the other post when she came back to do this one

Fr_Chuck · Aug 1, 2013, 06:54 AM

For what it is worth, she appears to be posting from New York, my only thought may be some Jr College in one of the inner city areas.

N0help4u · Aug 1, 2013, 07:15 AM

Figures. I hope she tales ALL the advice we gave her

JudyKayTee · Aug 1, 2013, 07:26 AM

"Everytime I see guys I like and I approach them, they say eww get away from me then they shove me away and call me a pest.

Are you a pest?

Bettylalu18 · Aug 3, 2013, 04:23 PM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

I don't know you at all. You have known yourself for 21 years. What do think might be going on?

I don't know but I'm 21 and I'm getting older. Why are they doing this to me? Why are they shoving me away and going after my female friends and classmates instead? Or is it because they have something against me?

Wondergirl · Aug 3, 2013, 04:29 PM

Originally Posted by Bettylalu18

I don't know but i'm 21 and i'm getting older. Why are they doing this to me? Why are they shoving me away and going after my female friends and classmates instead? Or is it because they have something against me?

When did this start?

If you can't figure it out, you're going o have to ask a relative or good friend.

Bettylalu18 · Aug 3, 2013, 04:30 PM

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

still sounds like you are hanging around high school guys,

and rating you 4 out of 10, adults don't do this.

I am sorry, it sounds like you are 15, not 21.

but you go out and meet more professional men, who wishes you to look and dress better,
if you want losers like you talk about here, dress and talk like a whore and they will have more interest

It's not what you think, I'm really 21 and I really want to know why guys won't approach me. And you want to know something? I live with my ghanaian family and my parents don't allow me to date. As a matter of fact, they don't allow me to do anything and sometimes they abuse me for no reason at all. If my parents saw me dressed like a whore, they would insult me and threaten me to go home and dress properly. I honestly dislike them for that reason. I don't want to dress like a whore because I'm used to having my mom and dad dress me up badly like an old woman.

Wondergirl · Aug 3, 2013, 04:32 PM

Originally Posted by Bettylalu18

i'm used to having my mom and dad dress me up badly like an old woman.

Maybe that's a clue. What do you wear?

Bettylalu18 · Aug 3, 2013, 04:32 PM

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

"Everytime I see guys I like and I approach them, they say eww get away from me then they shove me away and call me a pest.

Are you a pest?

No, I'm not a pest I'm just trying to approach them. And when they called me a pest, I realized they don't like me so I rolled my eyes and said whatever you to them.

Bettylalu18 · Aug 3, 2013, 04:35 PM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Maybe that's a clue. What do you wear?

I usually wear jeans with a blouse and jeans jacket and a pair of jordans. I don't have any brand name clothing or really nice looking clothes. Because my parents don't want to provide for me for some strange reason :(

talaniman · Aug 3, 2013, 04:36 PM

Maybe you need a make over. You don't have to dress like a slut to look like a modern college student in America. That may help you fit in and not stand out as a target for bullies.

N0help4u · Aug 3, 2013, 04:38 PM

That's what I told her on the other post that the girls at the University that I work at gave the one girl a really really easy make over.

talaniman · Aug 3, 2013, 04:38 PM

Originally Posted by Bettylalu18

I usually wear jeans with a blouse and jeans jacket and a pair of jordans. I don't have any brand name clothing or really nice looking clothes. Because my parents don't want to provide for me for some strange reason :(

I'm used to having my mom and dad dress me up badly like an old woman.

Wha??