[Man12345]

I've recently been getting very jealous and angry with my girlfriend on nights out. We are in a 7 year relationship and live together and share all the same hobbies. It's actually a really happy relationship day to day but the problems happen mainly on nights out together. Am not a big drinker and I am a social drinker. Very rarely drink in the house or mid week. Something inside of me flags something up, I.e. talking to a friend (writing it down it sounds so stupid and I know it really is) and I just can't let it go and it builds and builds and builds till I say something and it turns into a really raging argument! I feel myself just snap and even though I've never hit my girlfriend I have grabbed. I absolutely hate myself for this. Am not a horrible person normally and it usually takes a lot for me day to day to lose it but with a drink in me I ruin nights and occasions for her. I need help because she doesn't deserve this. She's the best person I've ever met. Any suggestions on how I could get help? Am taking a long spell off the drink.

[Confused fiancé]

I think stopping the alcohol is a start! But you need to try and find the reason as to why you have become jealous! Has she fone anything that may have broken your trust? Do u think there could be something that's changed with you that may have made you feel insecure. Have you spoke to her about this sober? You should express that you are feeling jealous so she can understand.

[talaniman]

AA would be a great help to KEEP you off the drinking and acting a fool. Maybe some anger management and some counseling on coping with your own resentments. Why let feelings build up and explode when you can learn better outlets for dealing with them?

[iamm_flawless]

I see where your going here? Jealousy hmm , the feeling is mutual especially if your partner is good looking but at times it can be a tad bit rough , the best thing to do is not to drink & see where your trust is in your relationship/friendship & maybe things won't be as hard nomore .

[joypulv]

The big question is if this happens without alcohol. It sounds like it doesn't. So staying sober is the solution.
There's no explanation that I have ever heard why some people are happy drunks and others mean, jealous, promiscuous, gregarious, you name it, there's a type for each person. Whether alcohol taps in to your deepest feelings is unclear.

We all experience jealousy. Look at any litter of puppies or kittens vying for mom's attention. It's part of survival. Unfortunately we humans can turn it into a poison.

In a healthy relationship, we let it out in little ways, joking or pretending to be hurt, or giving a little tit for tat. 'Oh so you like Tom Cruise over there, well I have my eye on Kim Bassinger over there.' 'I'm just a tough old garbage can you can run over every morning' 'What does HE have that I don't have?' Be funny, be clever, and accept the fact that contact with others is GOOD for the two of you to keep the juices flowing.