[sharday]

I don't know who my real mother all I know is she is from NC and I was adopted in to the family. The woman that adopted won't tell me who my mother is, they don't get along.

Who is my real mother?

[Stratmando]

I would try the Social Security Administration Location Services, they will get a letter to her, They won't tell you where she is, but she may contact you.
May be some other methods.

[JudyKayTee]

SS is not going to locate a birth mother when the child is adopted. Why would SS even have those records?

To the OP - how old are you? What is your date of birth?

WARNING: IN THE EVENT ANYONE ELSE HAS LOCATED THE MOTHER I CAUTION THAT THE OP MAY VERY WELL BE UNDER LEGAL AGE!

[ScottGem]

Your "real" mother is the person who raised you. Who was there to wipe your tears when you fell down and scraped your knee, who nursed you when you had a cold, who took you to get your first bra, etc. That person may not be your biological mother, but she is certainly your real mother.

If you were adopted, then when you become an adult, you can contact anyone of a number of services that seek to reunited birth parents and their adopted children. But it may not be that you real mother doesn't want to tell you who your bio mother is. She may not know or your birth mother may not want you to know.

[Stratmando]

I hadn't seen My Mom for over 40 years, remarrying changed her last name, I got a Book for Private Investegators Manual, and to Find a Parent, You can provide Info to the Social Security Administration LOCATION SERVICES, and they MAY be able to help you, sounds like either they don't provide that service anymore, or People aren't aware of it. Going to do a quick search.

Can't find any sign of it anymore.

[JudyKayTee]

You are right - this is much like the Post Office which at one point handed out forwarding addresses without blinking. Now it's loike pulling teeth -

Thanks for the explanation.

[ScottGem]

The SSA knows the current employer of every US citizen by SSN. So if you have a SSN, they can contact a person. But generally they only do so if there are pension monies due that person.

[joypulv]

I think sharday is saying that she was adopted by relatives of her birth mother, and they know who her birth mother is but won't tell.
Sharday, as said, you can't try to find out through legal channels until you are 18.

Be forewarned: if you aren't getting along as a typical teen, you may not like what you find if you do find your birth mother. Often children are rejected by a mother (out of shame and guilt, or drugs and crime, or a new family and a husband she doesn't want to upset or even know about you, or she can't support you - or just an inability to open up the feelings of giving you up). Often teen adoptees want to find a birth mother because they think it will be all love and acceptance. Not necessarily so!
Of course there are all sorts of ways to make it work, such as seeing each other little by little for a while, to adjust... but many don't work at all.

[JudyKayTee]

Joy, I agree - the mother is visible and I also took this to mean that the OP was adopted by a family member, knows who the mother is and wants to become acquainted with her.

And that's why I cautioned anyone about posting the info - all of your points are well justified and well explained.

[Synnen]

I detest the term "real" when used to describe a parent.

ALL parents are real---unless any of you have an IMAGINARY parent?

To the OP--If you are a minor, you will have to wait until you are 18 to search. Laws prevent us from helping a minor search for a biological parent. You must ask your LEGAL parent to help you.