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slim6p · May 5, 2013, 09:52 PM

The child lives in NY and I live in NY. Her mother lives in ATL and doesn't provide for the child. The child stays at her grandparents house which I agreed to because she helps her cousins.

J_9 · May 5, 2013, 10:04 PM

Who has custody of the child?

Alty · May 5, 2013, 10:07 PM

Does the mother of the child have custody? Who do the support payments go to, your ex or the grandparents? Does the ex also pay support for the child?

ScottGem · May 6, 2013, 03:18 AM

Is child support ordered by a court?

There is nothing illegal about paying child support. However, if you are paying it to a person who is not caring for the child, then its ineffective and not very smart.

cdad · May 6, 2013, 03:56 AM

If the child is not with the mother and isn't going to be for some time then go back to court and address the problem. It is possible to transfer the payments to the grandparents if in fact they are caring for the child. This is not something you can do behind court orders. The courts have to allow it before it can be done.

Fr_Chuck · May 6, 2013, 04:00 AM

Not only is it "legal" it is required that you pay child support if there is a court order for it. You must pay the support as to terms of any written agreement in court. If child is somewhere else, you can go back to court and ask for change to custody or support agreement

slim6p · May 6, 2013, 04:28 AM

The mother has custody. She does not use the money on the child. I do everything from lunch money, school fare, groceries, etc. The grandparents do very little and my child barely communicates with the mother. Nothing is sent to the grandparents. The mother does not take care of her and told her "your 17 I'm not giving you any money ask your father". How do I go about handling this situation. The court refuses to cancel the support order. I provided information to the court and the JHO didn't want to hear it. She just told me she doesn't see why it should stop. Any advise?

AK lawyer · May 6, 2013, 04:38 AM

Originally Posted by slim6p

... The court refuses to cancel the support order. I provided information to the court and the JHO didn't want to hear it. She just told me she doesn't see why it should stop. Any advise?

Either you failed to effectively communicate the entire story to the JHO, or the JHO could be wrong. Have you considered appealing?

ScottGem · May 6, 2013, 04:53 AM

Not sure what JHO stands for. Acronyms vary by area. Did you actually appear in Family Court? I don't know what proof you provided. Maybe it wasn't sufficient. I would go and apply for primary custody. If you can prove the child does not live with the mother, than you should be able to get Primary custody. Or you can approach the court and explain that you don't want to end support, you just want it to go to the right place, in this case the grandparents.

Finally, a possible alternative is to sue the mother for fraud. Child support is supposed to be used on the child. If you can prove its not, then you could win a lawsuit.

P.S. Please don't start a new thread for follow-up. Us ethe Answer or Reply options to post follow-up to this thread.

AK lawyer · May 6, 2013, 05:17 AM

Originally Posted by ScottGem

Not sure what JHO stands for. Acronyms vary by area.

Judicial hearing officer

slim6p · May 6, 2013, 06:06 AM

JHO means judicial hearing officer. Her mother has custody now. It's a weird situation. My daughter went to court and stated she didn't want to be with me. And within a few months my daughter calls me crying telling me she made a mistake and is at the grandparents house. Not in ATL with her mother. I explained this to the JHO and her mother was on a phone conference during the court date. A pointed out numerous false statements and the court didn't want to hear it. I was told they don't see why child support should stop.

ScottGem · May 6, 2013, 09:24 AM

Originally Posted by slim6p

I was told they don't see why child support should stop.

See that is what I was saying. I suspect you went into court trying to stop support, not redirect it. And the court just saw someone trying to get out of paying support. If you had taken the tack that you were not objecting to paying support, you just want to pay it towards who is now caring for your daughter so that she gets the benefit of it, the court may have ruled otherwise.

So that's what you have to do. Are you paying directly or through payroll deductions or what? Again, just try to redirect the support or have primary custody transferred to you.