Check out some similar questions!

Rw93 · Mar 20, 2013, 04:15 PM

Me and my partner have only been together for 5 months. Me being 20 and him being 23. The first month we were together we couldn't keep our hands off each other. Around the 1 month mark sex slowed down to a couple times a week. He explained work was very stressful and he had a lot on his mind which was fair enough, everyone has their moments. But 4 months on and our sex life is nearly non existent. I'd be lucky to get sex once a week. He always used to give me back massages but he won't anymore either. I have tried to talk about it with him but he gets defensive and it's one excuse after another. What makes it worse is that he will always touch me and seem like he really wants sex but as soon as it gets further he pulls away and decideds he doesn't want sex. Apart from the sex our relationship is great couldn't get any better. What could be going on with him? I'm so confused and it's starting to really get to me now.

Fr_Chuck · Mar 20, 2013, 05:04 PM

In real like and working people, 2 or 3 times a week is normal even once a week is normal for many people. New couples the first month or so, yes, go at it all the time, but the new wears off and being tired and work and life slows it down.

So is he tired, what hours, is there stress, money issues ? Have you sat down (not in bed) and just discussed, perhaps try to plan days it will work in schedule.

CravenMorhead · Mar 21, 2013, 04:45 PM

The other option is that he's got a naturally low libido. This could be the pace that he's at for the rest of his life.

His reasoning is sound, exhaustion and stress are common and valid libido killers, but he's being a bit of a c*** tease too which isn't really fair for you. As Chuck mentioned you need to have a conversation with him. Non-judgemental and accusation free.

Another thing to consider, it has only been 5 months. There is a common habit of throwing good money after bad, or more time on a relationship that just isn't working. I am guilty of it and it is always about the beating of a dead horse. It ain't getting up. As well a healthy intimate life is as important as anything in a relationship and when that get's lacking, everything starts to fall apart. Just something to consider. What is your long term plan here?