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    ANGRY FATHER's Avatar
    ANGRY FATHER Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Mar 10, 2013, 05:09 PM
    My nine year old sexually attacked my three year old. Should we make a police report?
    My nine years old stepdaughter sexually attack my three year old daughter using a toy bowling pin. My three year old told me as soon as it happen, we had her check out at the doctors. Thank GOD no damage to her private parts.

    We had CYS come to my house and interview the nine year old. We were visited three times and the case dismissed by CYS. We are taking our nine year old to therapy because she admitted it to us, and the doctor, that she did this because she is sexually attracted to her stepmother. She did this terrible act to our baby because her older brother was in his stepmothers arms crying and hugging her about 16 year old problems. The nine year old was so angry at seeing her brother in the arms of her want to be lover, she took it out on her younger sister.

    I want to make a police report, but file no charges, because of my wife is afraid the police will file charges and take her away. Someone please let me know what to do. My baby still talks about it and it's been 8 months. No way is our nine year old around any children, especially our children.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #2

    Mar 10, 2013, 05:33 PM
    No I would not file an incident report with the police, and I think that 3 reports from CYS would be sufficient, along with continuing therapy for both children. You seem to be alert, and attentive to your children's needs and I think it healthy your 3 year old can talk about it, and you can reassure her.

    Maybe you can stand a bit of help yourself, I know I would need some after what you have been through.

    Good luck to you and your whole family, I know its difficult.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Mar 11, 2013, 02:35 AM
    A police report is a police report, they decide to file or not file charges, I would go with what you have done, seems like you are in control of it now
    jenniepepsi's Avatar
    jenniepepsi Posts: 4,042, Reputation: 533
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    #4

    Mar 12, 2013, 01:43 PM
    I am sorry this happened to your 3 year old.

    But what about your 9 year old?

    Why is she acting out her anger in this way?

    Did she penetrate her sister with the bowling pin? Or just touch her with it?

    Did she do it out of anger and aggression? Or more innocent child thinking 'i saw this somewhere, I wonder how it works'

    Please don't treat your 9 year old like a convicted sex offender.

    She is getting therapy right?
    dontknownuthin's Avatar
    dontknownuthin Posts: 2,910, Reputation: 751
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    #5

    Mar 12, 2013, 01:54 PM
    It sounds like this story is not being told in an unbiased or fair manner, and that you've decided your step child is evil. I am also confused because you claim it is your step child, and that she is also the step child of the mother figure (your wife?). Are there any parents around who aren't step parents for this 9 year old?

    This story sounds distorted to me - either the child is misunderstood or the story is being told wrong. Also, the authorities were already advised what happened so unless the intent is to treat a 9 year old like a criminal, no more reports are needed. As others have said, don't treat this girl like a sex offender. Therapy is appropriate but I wonder what is going on in the 9 year old's life and would wonder where she would get such an idea. Sounds like she is being abused herself and needs a safer home environment. That's just not an idea a 9 year old would come up with without having experienced it themselves or being exposed to that sort of thing another way.
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,591, Reputation: 2941
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    #6

    Mar 12, 2013, 03:55 PM
    I'm with dontknownuthin!
    How can you treat a 9 year old with such anger? She acts the way she does because of HOW SHE IS BEING RAISED!
    If you feel guilty then face your guilt, don't lash out. Try to understand her.
    It doesn't mean you have to coddle her or excuse her actions, which you don't understand aren't really in any way adult type feelings of sexual attraction, they are a desperate longing for love.
    And yes, please tell us how it is that you are both her stepparents. Were you married to her stepmother who was married to her bio father when bio mother was already dead or gone?

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